


Dobby's Rescue

by letterbomb98



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Albus Dumbledore Bashing, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Good Severus Snape, James Potter Lives, Lily Evans Potter Lives, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Mild Smut, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Regulus Black Lives, Remus Lupin Lives, Sirius Black Lives, Time Travel Fix-It, and I cringe now, but it's not all bad, this was my first fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-17 23:30:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 73,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21851455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letterbomb98/pseuds/letterbomb98
Summary: What would happen if Dobby accidentally sent Hermione back in time instead of to Shell Cottage after being tortured by Bellatrix?
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Hermione Granger
Comments: 61
Kudos: 720





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> So this is the first fic I ever wrote and I don't really like it much anymore.  
> But I'm going to post it so I can get used to formatting on this site.  
> If you want, the whole finished thing is on ff.net under the same name and everything.
> 
> If you can think of other tags I should add, please let me know.
> 
> Enjoy I suppose!

“I’m going to ask you again! Where did you get this sword? Where?”

“We found it – we found it – PLEASE!” I screamed. I screamed louder when I felt that cursed knife drag another letter. And louder still when her next crucio hit.

“You’re lying, filthy Mudblood, and I know it! You have been inside my vault at Gringotts! Tell the truth, tell the truth!”

She was mad. I always knew she was deranged- if her cackling at the Department of Mysteries was anything to go by.

“It’s a fake, it’s a fake! I swear!”

“Lies! CRUCIO!” I felt my throat scratch as another scream tore from me.

By this point I was beyond the comprehension of pain. Edging on the blackness clouding my vision. I held on still. But for what? I barely acknowledged movement to my left. Then I was wrenched up into the arms of that madwoman.

“STOP OR SHE DIES!” And that knife. That knife that branded me like cattle. Was at my throat.

“Drop your wands,” she whispered. “Drop them, or we’ll see exactly how filthy her blood is!”

And then I saw them.

My brothers in all but blood. Worse for wear with terrified expressions on their faces. I wanted to scream at them that I’m not worth it. To save themselves, get out and win this war. I was so tired. And the darkness so inviting. And I felt blood trickling down my throat into my cleavage.

I heard the sounds of apparition and noted the confused faces on the faces of those in the room. Could they still be considered people? After the horrors they’ve inflicted?

Bellatrix’s grip on me loosened only for me to be pulled into much smaller arms. I heard voices shouting but they sounded so far away. I heard a sickening sound next to me but couldn’t dwell on it before I felt the familiar, almost forgotten lurch in my stomach I was all too acquainted with in my third year.

I had to close my eyes to the nausea I was overcome with. And when I opened them I was met with very large eyes on a very small body. Which was covered in blood from the knife that was protruding out of his stomach. I reach out a shaking hand towards him.

“Dobby?” I croaked, my voice grown hoarse.

“Dobby is a free elf, Dobby is home” He whispered. I didn’t have the time to contemplate his meaning before his little body slumped to ground.

I let out what I could only assume was a sob. No tears left to cry. 

I heard voices to my right. Four boys were making their way over to my direction and if I looked close enough I could see the shape of a castle in the background behind them.

“What is this?” One voice questioned.

I don’t kn- oh Merlin! Pads, we have to get her to Poppy!” Another said.

I looked toward that voice. The voice belonging to a boy with messy hair and glasses.

“Harry?” I croaked before the blackness finally claimed me.

And my final, fleeting thought was of hazel eyes instead of green.


	2. Chapter 2

White. From the darkness of my slumber to the light of my conscious state. From black to white. I looked to my left and back to ..Black?

“Hello, the name’s Black, Sirius Black.” I’ve gone mad.

“I’m dead.” I have to be.

“No you’re alive, if only just.” Bellatrix has done it. I’m crazy.

“You’re ..dead.” 

“No, love, everyone here is alive.” He chuckled.

I tried to sit up only to be attacked with pain shooting through every nerve in my body.

“Easy, easy.” He said, shifting the pillows and helping me up. “You gave us quite a scare there yesterday.”

“Oh? And who is “us”?” I asked fearing the answer.

“Why that would be me. James Potter at your service,” he said with an exaggerated bow. “and with me are my two brothers, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew.” The other two boys waved awkwardly from behind him.

I felt the blackness creeping in my vision and was overcome with a sudden dizziness. My heart was beating rapidly out of time so loud I’m sure the boys could hear.  
Thankfully, Madame Pomfrey chose that moment to make a convenient entrance.

“Out! Out! I won’t have you boys harassing my patient!”

“But Poppy! We just wanted to be better acquainted with our lovely visitor!” Sirius said with a wink in my direction.

“I’m sure you do but at the moment she is in absolutely no condition for anything of the sort now OUT!”

With that the four boys scrambled for the exit just as Dumbledore decided to enter. I had to stifle a gasp, as it seems all my ghosts have decided to make an appearance.

"Ah! I can see our traveler has woken up!” He said.

“Yes and she is still very weak at the moment and is in no mood to talk to anyone-“

“Actually, I’d very much like to talk to Professor Dumbledore.” I spoke tentatively.

“Poppy, could you give us a moment?” Dumbledore asked, eyes twinkling.

“So, my dear, you seem to know my name, but I definitely don’t recall yours.” He said once the mediwitch had left, grumbling on about meddlesome headmasters.

“Yes, sir,” I began in a weak voice. “I- my name is ..Hermione” I started unsure of what to say.

“Alright then, Hermione, can you possibly explain to me how you were able to appear out of nowhere on Hogwarts grounds with a house elf?” He asked with a serious undertone.

In all the excitement of waking up I had almost forgotten about Dobby. I had to hold in a sob as I thought of the knife buried in his abdomen.

“Wh- what happened to him? After I..” I trailed unable to continue for the lump in my throat.

“He was buried toward the edge of the forest. I’m sorry, my dear, we couldn’t do anything for him. The knife was taken to be examined. It was a very dark object.” I nodded. Dark indeed if the throbbing in my left arm was anything to go by.

“Appiration is not possible on Hogwarts grounds and portkeys are to be set up with consultation from myself. Forgive me for pressing- it’s a safety concern you must understand, these are dark times- but how did you come to appear here?” He prodded.

“I- I’m n-not quite sure myself.” I began shakily. “W-what ..year is it?”

“The year is 1977. Mid-October to be precise.” He said with a calculating look.

I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t breathe. Bloody hell. My thought process immediately takes me to Ron. His favorite phrase. And Harry. Oh Merlin. Are they alright? They don’t even know about Dobby. I’m hit with a sudden loneliness when I realize my two best friends- my two brothers aren’t even born yet and I’m stuck with ghosts in the wrong timeline.

“Ah, I do believe we have an answer.”

“Sir, d-do you- is it p-possible for house elves to travel through time?” I asked once again fearing the answer.

“It has never been recorded, no. I do believe this to be an accident. I must ask, what were you doing immediately before arriving here?” His eyes devoid of any twinkle.

“I do believe Dobby’s attempt was a rescue mission. I don’t think it’s safe to say more. Bad things happen to those who mess with time.”

“Indeed a wise precaution. At this time however, time travel is still in developmental stages. I’m afraid at this point in time there is no way for you to travel back.” Dumbledore said in an empathetic tone.

I knew this. Time travel wasn’t theorized until 1974, wasn’t tested until 1980 and the time turner wasn’t even invented until 1982. I researched it extensively in third year. But to hear it out loud. It’s so finite, so real.

“Here, my dear, I understand this is difficult.” He handed me a tissue. I didn’t even know I was crying.

“I told you she was in no state for conversation! She needs rest!” Madame Pomfrey said as she ambled over with a multitude of potions and bandages.

“Indeed.” Dumbledore said standing up. “I think it would do best to let you rest and we’ll continue this conversation when you’re able.” And with that he was out the door.

“Alright dearie, let’s tend to your wounds and I’ll let you sleep.” She said giving me pain relief potion and made to reach for my left arm. I flinched out of her grasp and had to stifle a groan when my nerves were once again set ablaze.

“I know, dear. I know, but I need to clean it.” She reached for it again and this time I let her. I hissed as she unwrapped the bloody bandage. I looked away. I couldn’t stand to look at that foul word forever engraved on my flesh.

“Will it scar?” I asked knowing the answer already.

“Yes, I’m sorry. The knife used must have been cursed. The wound can’t close and it doesn’t stop bleeding so we have to dress it every few hours. Here take this.” She handed me a blood-replenishing potion. I glanced at my arm long enough to note the white already turning red.

“Upon further examination, it appears you are extremely malnourished,” What gave that away? “with a multitude of cuts and bruises, scrape marks, curse wounds, ect., and what appears to be a broken leg that never healed properly.”

At the end of her analysis, I chanced a look at her face. She had grown pale with eyes begging the question what happened to you?

“Sounds about right.” I whispered.

She continued to give me that same pitying stare. I heard shuffling and hushed whispers coming from an empty corner of the room.

“Try to sleep, dear. Sleep helps the healing process.” Only then did I realize that it was dark out.

I slid further down the mattress attempting to find comfort in my shot nerves. I exhaled slowly letting exhaustion take me under.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Congrats for enduring chapter 2!
> 
> It gets better I'm pretty sure.


	3. Chapter 3

I was caught in a tidal wave.

I was drowning.

I was screaming.

I couldn’t think of anything but the sea of pain I was in.

I registered a familiar voice. I could smell the stench of blood in the air. I opened my eyes and chanced a look. I screamed louder- if that was possible.

Fenir Greyback.

“Reckon she’ll let me have a bit of the girl when she’s finished with her?” He leered at me. He was so close I could see bits of flesh in his fangs.

“So ..soft. So ..young!” He drug a claw down one side of my face. I flinched. He laughed.

“I love it when they put up a fight.” He made to grab me but Bellatrix was faster.

She forced me to the floor and held me under another of her crucios.

“Where did you get that sword you filthy Mudblood!” She pulled out her knife.

“We found it! We found it!” I pleaded. I felt her knife dig in. I screamed.

“LIES! How did you get into my vault!?” I couldn’t focus on anything but pain.

“We didn’t! It’s a fake- a fake!” I cried.

“Greyback! It seems our guest needs some more ..efficient persuasion!” I saw him start to come closer. I tried to move but I couldn’t, I was petrified- whether by fear or spell I didn’t know.

“Let’s see if that pretty mouth is good for anything better than lies!” He came closer and started to unbuckle is belt. I screamed even more. He unzipped his pants. I opened my eyes.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

When I was blasted off my family tree, I knew the war was getting serious. Pureblood supremists had finally found a foothold. I’d always known that pureblood ideals were extreme. The first time I heard the slur, I knew no better synonym. I wasn’t taught to have one. When I saw that girl laying there broken and branded with the slur I was raised on, I knew I’d actually found a reason to fight. The war was suddenly not just to spite my estranged family. Whether the reason was simply to prevent more instances like this or specifically for this girl in particular, I didn’t know.

I could recognize the aftereffects of the Cruciatus fairly easily given my upbringing. I didn’t even need to look at her arm to see that it was a cursed wound, probably done with a blade that wouldn’t look out of place in my family’s vault. Any fool could see she hadn’t been eating well with how thin she was. The rest of her cuts and bruises were just the icing on the pitiful cake she represented. She looked like she’d been to hell. But she survived.

When James suggested we sneak down to the hospital wing under the invisibility cloak and eavesdrop, it was unanimous, but when we heard Poppy run through her list of injuries, needless to say we were shocked. Who was this girl? What’s her story?

After the mediwitch made her exit and the girl appeared to fall asleep, we all sat around on nearby beds and chairs.

We were silent for a long time.

“Merlin.” Remus exhaled. “Even I don’t come out that bad.” We chuckled weakly. It’s not very often Mooney makes a joke about his lycanthropy.

“You said it.” I agreed.

“Did you guys hear her?” James asked uncertainly. “When we found her? She looked at me and called me Harry.”

“Well, she asked me if I was dead.”

“She was probably not in her right mind, you saw the state she was in...” Peter trailed off.

Yes, we all definitely saw the state she was in. One look around me told me that we were all thinking the same thing. Once more we lapsed into silence.

Then the girl started to convulse on her bed. She was shaking uncontrollably her back arching off the bed. I immediately knew she was reliving the cruciatus again in her dreams. She started to scratch at her left arm, irritating the flesh even more. We were frozen. And then she let out a bloodcurdling scream and that sent us into action scrambling under the cloak before Pomfrey could see us. No doubt she heard the girl.

“We found it! We found it!” And she screamed more.

“It’s a fake- a fake!” She was still shaking and clawing at her arm as Poppy came rushing over to her bedside to try and wake her up. She screamed even louder than before and then she opened her eyes and I was trapped. Despite the obvious fear and desolate helplessness practically radiating from her irises, I was captivated by the warm, deep caramel color.

I expected her to start sobbing and clinging to the mediwitch, but this girl only shied away from every attempt to console her. Poppy then said something that finally pulled her back to reason and allowed herself to down a calming drought. She then held out her shaking arm and let Madame Pomfrey unwrap the blood soaked bandage. The girl didn’t flinch but she also didn’t look at the wound, but I knew my mates caught sight of it if their quiet attempts at swallowing their bile is anything to go by.

When Poppy finally left and the girl had drank a dreamless sleep potion, we knew it was time to go back to our dorm. The walk back to Gryffindor Tower was slow and silent. None of us trusted our voices to make a sound. We gave the password and made our way past the cold, lifeless fireplace and up the stairs to the seventh year boy’s dorms.

“She doesn’t look to be much older than us.” Remus said when we all settled on our beds.

“Who would do that to a person, let alone a girl?” James breathed. I could tell he was thinking of a certain redhead currently residing in the girl’s dorms.

“You know who.” I said darkly, not catching Peter’s panicked look. “My family for starters. And any other blood purest for that matter. They get off on shit like that.”

“Well there’s no doubt that she’s a muggleborn.”

“And what do you mean by that, _Peter_?” I asked hotly.

“Alright let’s calm down.” Remus stepped in. “It’s been rough and this is a shock we don’t need to pick fights with each other.”

Only then did I notice James rummaging in his trunk looking for something.

“What are you doing, mate?”

“Well, while you guys are having a little shit show, I am going to find out who this girl is.” He said holding up a spare bit of parchment.

“The map never lies, of course! Prongs, you’re a genius!”

“Why thank you, Mooney, it was bound to happen eventually.”

“Well? Get on with it, what’s this bird’s name?” I asked impatiently.

“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good…”

As the carefully drawn lines started to appear, our gaze immediately sought out the hospital wing. There in the bed where we just left her, was two inkblots in the shape of footprints with fifteen letters that will change my life forever.

Hermione Granger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Rich Text is something I like very much. HTML who?


	4. Chapter 4

When I woke up I take noticed that it was light out, probably morning. I sat up and was delighted to find that the pain was considerably less. I looked around for my wand and beaded bag panicking that they aren’t next to me. After spending almost a year on the run, I’ve grown rather attached. Only when I’m verging the point of hysterics does Madame Pomfrey come over to my bedside to once again give me potions and change my bandages.

“Where is my wand and bag?” I break off into a coughing fit, my throat still dry and raw from the nighttime excitement.

“Just over there. Here. I’ll get them for you.” She hands me a glass of water and I sip greedily before being reunited with my belongings. There was a palpable sigh when my wand was finally back in hand.

“How are you feeling, dear? You don’t seem to be shaking as bad which is a good sign for a fast recovery. How are your pain levels?”

“Fine.” I answer tonelessly. She frowned.

“I researched your wound and found that typical healing charms and salves will not close the wound so I’m afraid we’re going to have to stitch it up the muggle way. Is that alright, dear?” She said holding up needle and thread.

“Yes, fine.” Leave it to purebloods to not think about muggle medicinal treatment when cursing a wound. “Could you send for Professor Dumbledore? Now that I’m awake, I’d like to continue our conversation from yesterday.”

“Of course.” She said and she sent her patronus away with a message.

I used to be afraid of needles when I was younger. But now as Poppy stitches my arm, the repetitive sticking hardly phases me. Quite depressing that I realize I’ve been through much worse and fear worse things than silly needles. She wraps my arm once more and I’m pleased to note that the bandage isn’t immediately soaking through. The doors to the wing open.

“Feeling better today?” Dumbledore asks as he approaches.

When I don’t answer he continues on. “I always find that a good night’s sleep always help.”

I don’t even bother to point out that my sleep was most certainly not good. I put up a silencing charm around the area. “Sir, I think we need to discuss my situation as I am, as of right now, here indefinitely, and have no money, clothes, place to stay…“ I trail off.

“Ah, straight to business I see.” He begins with a twinkle that’s far brighter than what I saw in my own time. “You look to be around seventeen, correct? So I will have no qualms placing you in with the current seventh years.” I wonder what finally dulls that sparkle in my headmaster’s eye. “There’s a fund here at Hogwarts for muggleborns to be able to fill their needs. I have no doubt that you will be able to use a portion of that. Now tell me, what house were you in when you came from?”

“Gryffindor.”

“Excellent. And what classes will you be taking?”

“Newt level.”

“Wonderful, you will fit right in. When you feel well enough to attend class, I’ll let you get acquainted with our Head Girl, Lily Evans.”

He kept talking but I couldn’t hear anything else. My breath caught in my throat. Despite meeting the infamous Marauders, it never sank in that I’ll have to attend class and converse with everyone knowing their fates. How will I be able to look at Harry’s _parents_ and Harry’s _godfather_ without being overcome with guilt and grief?

“And what of my cover story?” I asked with a shaking voice.

“I’ve thought this through and I believe it would be best for you to be my godchild. You went to Beauxbatons but lived in London during summers. Deatheaters raided your home, murdered your parents, and, to explain your current state, tortured you before a house elf was able to apperate you here to me, as your sole guardian.”

“As long as nobody asks too many questions, I should be fine.”

“Well then, welcome home, Hermione…?”

“Granger, sir.” I said tried to hold in my tears.

“Welcome home Miss Granger.”

It’s true, I’m home.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

“Okay what’s the plan?” I ask looking at James’ tactical breakfast plate.

“We have double potions today with the Slytherins,” I nod. “We sit in the back of the class here.” He continued pointing to two broken pieces of bacon.

“You two are idiots.” Remus interjected.

“Snivellus sits here.” He points to a bit of sausage continuing on as if he didn’t hear. “Now we-“

“No, no hold up.” I cut in. “there’s no way he’s that _big_ , come on, mate. And he’s not greasy enough- oi! Mooney, pass me the gravy!”

“Why do I associate with them?”

“I wonder that every day, Remus.” A new voice adds.

“Lily-flower! How lovely of you to join us!”

“Sod off, Black. Potter, Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies. Now, tell me, what horrible scheme am I going to have to deduct points for today?”

“I’m so very glad you asked, love. Padfoot and I are going to get hurt in class so we can go to the hospital wing.”

“As much as I love the idea of you getting hurt, what’s so special about the hospital wing?”

“There’s a girl there!” James exclaims excitedly.

“Oh. Do I know her?” She asks barely containing her jealousy. I give Remus a look wanting to see if he caught it. By the twitch at the corner of his mouth it seems he did.

“Nah she’s new. Arrived two days ago.” He’s oblivious. The git chases her since year one but can’t see she’s jealous. Amazing.

“Well, I hope she’s worth it.” She said indignantly.

“She is.” I say before I can stop myself. Remus gives me a questioning glance. The prat probably picked something from that. Lovely. I clear my throat.

“Where’s Wormy?” I ask effectively drawing attention away.

“Dunno. Hopefully he won’t miss the show in potions.” James says going back to his tactical breakfast.

“There’s no point with these two is there?” Lily asks Remus.

“I stopped trying years ago.” He says.

* * *

“There’s the list of ingredients, now get to it! Those laughing potions aren’t going to make themselves!” Slughorn said jovially.

“Alright, Pads, you go switch the git’s alihotsy with a vile of aggripa and I’ll distract him. Oi! Snivellus!”

I made my way over to the storeroom chuckling as I went. I caught Remus’s shake of his head and laughed harder. When I returned with the purple vile, I noticed Snape’s face turning a deep shade of red. Amusing really, it’s a simple formula we figured out long ago: mention Evans, Snape changes color. No charm required. I deftly switched the ingredients and went back to James’s side.

“Shit, mate what’d say to make him that red?” I questioned.

“Oh just the usual, “Lily will never forgive you, you’re a deatheater” routine.”

“Wonderful. Now if I am correct-“

“A rare occurance”

“Then he should be on his last few clockwise stirs before we get blasted hot potion and infected with painful acne.” We shared a triumphant look.

“Have you thought about what we’re going to say to her when we get there?” He asked.

“I don’t have the foggiest.” It thoroughly escaped my mind through the planning that we will actually talk to her when we get there. I’ve wanted nothing more than to visit her and speak with her again but with no excuse to go-

My thought process was cut off by the predicted bang. Satisfied that James and I are thoroughly covered in the mess.

“Oh no! Boys, go, off to the hospital wing, the three of you, go on, I’ll clean this mess up.”

Wait three? Did I hear Slughorn correctly? Then I notice Snivellus practically drowning in the mess of potion. Hopeful we’ll make it to the infirmary with no incident.

“I knew you two were up to something.” No such luck. “Is it even worth it then? Your idiocy has hurt you both as well.”

“Actually, _Snivellus_ , it wasn’t about you. Don’t get narcissistic on us.”

“The only narcissistic one here is you, _Potter_.” He drew his wand but before he could cast anything, Pomfrey burst through the doors to the wing.

“Yes, Slughorn told me you three would be arriving. Put that wand away Mr. Snape. I will not have you boys dueling in my infirmary.” And with that she led us each to a bed and went off to collect the appropriate salves.

When she came back and started treatment, she was grumbling on about “unsafe conditions” and “what kinds of things they teach these students”.

“Who’s that?” Snape asked, his slytherin mask expressionless despite his curious voice.

“Never you mind, dears. Leave her be. Now I have to let that sit for a few hours, can I trust that you three won’t kill each other while I get some paperwork done?”

“Of course Madame, what makes you think you can’t us?” I asked with a wink. She scoffed and retreated to her office.

“Oh honestly.” A small voice whispered, inaudible to those lacking canine hearing.

I looked over, and I saw her. She was sitting in a chair near her bed looking out the window toward the Scottish mountains. The late morning sun lighting her silhouette, making her curls glow. She looked better than we last saw her.

“Honestly what, love?” She nearly jumped out of her skin at my voice. James looked confused as did Snape.

She locked eyes with me and I drowned in caramel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are you liking it so far?
> 
> Hopefully, it's picking up a bit.


	5. Chapter 5

**HERMIONE**

Silver, with flecks of blue. Rainy skies with gaps in the clouds. Hope in the bleak grey of the world. Even from across the room, I could see it in his eyes and I knew he was my undoing.

I took this quick minute to appraise the boy looking at me. High cheekbones, strong jawline, beater’s build, shaggy, raven colored hair. The corner of his mouth turned up and I remembered his smirk in the future when I asked him to show me the library at Girmmauld. But this boy is missing his tattoos and I find I miss them as well.

“Pads, stop scaring the girl.” I looked at the messy haired boy the voice belonged to. _Harry._ No. James. I was overcome with intense longing. Whether for the companionship of Harry or for the hazel eyed copy that will die in four years I do not know.

“Who are you?” A new, old voice addressed me. Snape. There was no doubt. This boy with a hooked nose and greasy hair will go on to sell out his best friend, turn spy, and inevitably kill the man that accepted his defection.

“Who are you?” I retort.

“Severus Snape.” I nod.

“Well? What’s your name?” He all but demanded.

“Now Snivellus, that’s no way to talk to a pretty lady.”

“How would you know, Black? You don’t seem to do much talking when you’re with them.”

“Yeah? Maybe you’d like some pointers since you can’t get-“

“Hermione” I interrupted.

They looked confused.

“Hermione Granger.” I added.

“A Winter’s Tale?” Snape questioned, expressionless as always.

“Correct.” I noted the confused looks on James and Sirius and added. “Shakespeare, muggle play. Hermione is a character.”

“Well then Hermione, will you be attending Hogwarts this year?” Sirius asked not even bothering to hide his hopeful expression.

“Yes, and before you ask, Gryffindor.” James and Sirius let out a whoop and hi-fived only to whimper when the acne on their hands became agitated. Snape merely scoffed and became disinterested immediately.

“So why come in the middle of term? Did you transfer from somewhere?” James asked.

“Beauxbatons, yes, and if it’s all the same I’d rather not talk about it right now.” My voice all but died with the last few words. I looked back out the window.

“My apologies. Do you know when you’ll join us for class?” He asked hesitantly.

“When I’ve recovered.” I whispered. Will I recover? Can I come back from this? The silence in the room was tangible.

“What’s wrong with your arm?” Snape broke it and Hell broke loose.

But I couldn’t hear anything. I couldn’t take in air. It felt as if I was underwater. I heard snippets of what the boys were yelling but nothing registered. And then I heard her. Her cackling. Her demented voice asking me to come out and play. To have a little chat, girl to girl. I felt myself trembling. I unconsciously started scratching the bandage on my arm. The edges of my vision going black. By now I was shaking uncontrollably. Scratching turned to clawing. I felt something cool against my cheek only to realize I must have fell out of my chair. I felt strong arms hoist me up. I started panicking trying to push her away to get the madwoman to release her hold on me. Someone forced my jaw open and pour something down my throat. Finally, I let the blackness take me once more.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

“What. The fuck. Was. _That_.”

“Shut your mouth, Snivellus.” James whispered in a deadly tone.

“I won’t have that language in my infirmary. If you won’t help go on and leave. I shouldn’t have let you stay with her in the first place.”

I couldn’t move. I just kept looking at the girl in front of me. I’d never seen anything to that extent. The look in her eyes, so far away and _broken_. And the frenzied panic when I picked her up off the floor like she _had_ to break away from me. I watched as Madame Pomfrey unwrapped the blood soaked bandage. She had ripped out her stitches with her clawing.

“Is that- Does that say..? _Fuck._ ” Snape breathed on the verge of hysterics, his face even paler than normal.

“You wanted to know what was wrong with her arm, _Snape._ Tell me. What was it you called Lily? In fifth year?” James said coldy.

Both drew their wands with curses on their tongues but before either could cast a voice interrupted them.

“Potter, Snape. Leave. _Now_. Mr. Black, come here.” I walked over and chanced a glance at James. He looked ready to kill. We locked eyes and he nodded before following Snape out.

I sat in the chair beside Hermione’s head.

“Here.” Poppy said holding out Hermione’s freshly stitched arm and a bottle of greenish substance. “the wound won’t close but the dittany and murtlap essence will still help a little. Just apply it and I’ll be back with a fresh bandage.” With that she scurried away.

I took the stopper out of the dittany and looked down at the small forearm in my lap. Her skin, so beautiful and unblemished and smooth, now forever marred with such a degrading word. I scooped a portion of murtlap essence and began to smooth that on as well. What kind of person would harm such a beautiful creature?

“Here you are, dear. Just wrap it around. It should hold the salves in place enough. Maybe if she’d stop clawing it, it’ll heal properly.” And she turned and left again.

I held her arm up and started to wrap it. She feels so fragile and looks _so_ small. I gently place her arm back by her side but continued to hold her small hand. I studied her face. I note how peaceful she looks, worry lines disappeared, brow unfurrowed. No trace of the fear and emptiness she wears in her waking life.

I don’t know how long I sit there with her until I feel a tap on my shoulder. I look up and see my friends gathered around the bed.

“Padfoot, mate, come on. It’s almost dinner.” Remus says in a knowing voice.

Reluctantly, I stand up and follow them out.

* * *

It’s almost a week before I’m able to see her again. Madame Pomfrey wouldn’t let her have visiters and when we snuck down with the cloak, she had been moved to a private room. In that time we took to what we do best, pranks. Mostly on Snape because he had it coming from that day in the hospital wing.

Life had carried on as it normally did. The only difference was the rumor of a transfer student. James chased after Lily. Lily hexed James. Remus studied in the library. Peter… Peter did whatever he does these days. It seemed I was the only one who couldn’t focus. Ever since we found her she’s been indefinitely planted in my mind.

When I finally saw her, she looked terrified. Who wouldn’t when Dumbledore decides to introduce you to the entire school at dinner? After she’s announced as a Gryffindor, she hurries over to our table and takes the vacant seat next to Remus across from Lily.

“I’m Lily, Head Girl, and I assume you’ve met the boys because they couldn’t stop talking about you. Dumbledore mentioned you and I have the same schedules? I’m not sure what Beauxbatons’s curriculum is like but I’ll help you if you need-“

“Evans, she just sat down. Let her breathe.” I chuckled.

“Actually, Sirius, I don’t mind, really.” She said as she reached out for a dinner roll. I noted her wearing long sleeves.

“Well, in that case, what’s your favorite subject?” Remus asked.

“I’m rather good with charms.”

“You’ll love the professor here, Flitwick? He really makes sure you understand the theory as well as the practical application.” Lily gushed.

I carefully watched her face. When she met Lily’s eyes, somehow her already broken look, shattered and she just stared, eyes glazed over, lost in her own world. I wonder what has her so caged.

“Come back to us, love.” I said, allowing my concern to show.

“Sorry, I just lost myself for a moment. Uh… I-I’m going to the library.” She started to get up.

“Do you need someone to show you the way?” Lily asked, brows furrowed.

“N-no, no. I’m sure I can make it.” She practically ran.

“Weird.” Peter mumbled. I bristled. Since when did I become so protective?

“Well, it seems we have another bookworm to join our unofficial club, Lily” Remus tried.

“What? Oh, yes, yes. Do you think she’s alright? Maybe I should go after her…”

“I think she just wanted to be alone, Lils” James said carefully.

“Yeah, she hasn’t been around a lot of people in a while. We probably just overwhelmed her.” Remus offered.

“I guess you’re right.” She looked dejected.

“Well we have some pranks to plan, so if you’ll excuse us.” I said standing, urging the others to follow.

We hurried back to our dorm and frantically opened the map to see if she made it to the library. When we saw that she wasn’t anywhere near it, we looked through the entire map but she wasn’t anywhere. Then we saw her appear in the seventh floor corridor.

“How could she just appear, you can’t apperate in Hogwarts.” Remus mused.

“Then how did she end up on the grounds when we found her?” James pondered.

“She had a house elf with her so-“

“Guys we have a problem.” I interrupted shoving the map at them.

Mulciber, Malfoy, and Dolohov were making their way in her direction. Without any discussion, the four of us ran through the hallways to try and intercept whatever sick thing these three were about to do. When we came close, we could hear voices.

“What do we have here? A little Mudblood.” Malfoy, I recognized.

“Aw, look at her pull out her wand. She thinks she can do magic.” Dolohov.

“Save it for real witches, sweetheart. Wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself. Grab her. I want to have some fun.” Mulciber. No one else is that sick.

We heard curses flying and came out from behind the corner to help, only to find three bodies on the ground and a heavily panting girl standing looking like a caged animal. When she finally noticed us, she muttered something about a “bloody map” but I was too worried with looking her over for injuries to pay attention.

“Are you alright?” I asked stepping closer. She nodded.

“We’re going to take these three to the hospital wing, they don’t look so great.” James said as he began to levitate the body of Dolohov.

“No, don’t. Just leave them here. I modified their memories already. Let them suffer a bit.” She whispered. Everyone was silent. We just continued to stare at this brilliant witch that just took on three Slytherins without so much a scratch. I cleared my throat to break the tension.

“Would you like us to walk you back to your dorm?” I asked hesitantly.

She nodded.

“Brilliant, Lily’s been going mad since you left. I think the responsibility of another human being has made her a bit barmy.” James laughed.

The walk back was painfully slow met with tense silence. But what do you say to a girl that just illegally altered the memories of boys that were about to harm her? The sad thing is that I don’t think this encounter isn’t the worst thing she’s been through.

When we walked through the portrait, we were met with a blur of red as Lily drug Hermione up the stairs to the girl’s dormitories muttering about “curfew” and “meeting the others”.

We walked up the stairs leading to our dorms and immediately fell on our beds exhausted. I was asleep before my head even hit the pillow.


	6. Chapter 6

**HERMIONE**

I woke up screaming again.

I reached up a shaking hand and pushed my sweat soaked hair out of my face. One look at my sopping red bandage told me I’d have to make a visit to the infirmary before class. Maybe she’d let me keep needle and thread with me since I keep ripping out the stitches. I guess this is what I get for forget to take Dreamless Sleep. At least I remembered the silencing charm. I knew I wouldn’t be getting anymore sleep so I laid there and allowed myself to catch my breath and calm down.

My thoughts traveled to my dorm mates. Aside from Lily, I’d only heard vague stories of the others and what they did in the war. Marlene McKinnon I knew died with the rest of her family when Voldemort paid a house call. Dorcas Meadowes died on a mission to raid the house of a deatheater. Alice Longbottom, of course right now she’s a Prewett, tortured to insanity. After being under that same witch’s wand, I can understand how one could go mad.

When light started to filter in through my bed hangings, I got up to wash the nightmare off my skin. Hissing as the water poured over various cuts that still hadn’t healed, I watched the water at my feet turn red. Satisfied, I turned off the water and stepped out, looking at my appearance in a mirror for the first time in months.

I knew I wasn’t beautiful before, and I wasn’t expecting much, but what I saw made my heart ache. I was deathly pale with dark purple, bruised circles that had made permanent residence under my eyes. Malnourished was an understatement. You could literally play the xylophone on my ribs and my hip bones could cut someone. My usual round cheeks were now a gaunt shell of the fullness they used to have. I had scars everywhere. A purple one leading from my right collarbone to just above my left hip, compliments to Antonin Dolohov fifth year. Multiple pale lines marking anywhere and everywhere from cutting hexes and living in the woods and dueling. A faint pink line scars across my neck and I know it too will turn purple from the dark curses on Bellatrix’s knife. The branding on my left arm may never scar if I keep clawing it when I’m distressed. At least now I can look at it without going into hysterics. I suppose the cherry on top of the pitiful sundae of my sad appearance is my deformed ankle from when I broke it that night with Harry in Godric’s Hollow. Poppy said I’ll walk with a slight limp the rest of my life because I never healed it correctly.

A knock on the door pulled me out of my self-pitying thoughts.

“Hermione?” It was Lily. “It’s almost time for class. Would you like me to wait so I can walk with you?”

“That would be wonderful, thank you.” I heard myself say in a voice that wasn’t my own.

I had to alter the uniform Dumbledore provided me so it would fit my small frame. When I walked down the stairs leading to the common room, I was met with five smiling faces that were contagious enough to pull the corner of my mouth up. Upon seeing this their smiles got even bigger if it were possible.

“Come on. I’ll walk you to breakfast and we can go over our schedule since Dumbledore put you in all my classes.” Lily said reaching for my arm. I flinched slightly but allowed her to take it anyway.

Breakfast was uneventful. According to the Marauders that is. Apparently, just putting a potion in Slytherin’s drinks causing them to cough red and gold bubbles is boring. Either way, after managing a small bit of toast without succumbing to the nausea in my stomach, I made my way to the charms classroom with Lily, pretending to look interested in her various tips and facts about the castle.

We sat towards the middle of the room while the Marauders took their post at the back. Once Flitwick arrived and told us we’d be learning the Disillusion Charm, I started to panic. Quick thinking told me to blend in and not draw attention to my intelligence. After observing others and gauging the average skill, I purposefully messed up a few times. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, my senses alerting me that I was being watched. Instinct told me to immediately get out of sight. So without processing my actions, I successfully disillusioned myself.

“Ten points to Gryffindor! Perfect execution of the charm! What is your name, dear?” So Flitwick noticed. Shit.

“Hermione Granger, sir.” I took the charm off.

“Ah, yes, Albus told me all about you. His Goddaughter, yes?” I heard murmuring start up, no doubt news would be all over the castle by lunch. “Of course. We expect great things from you Miss Granger.” No pressure at all.

“Thank you, sir.”

When we finally made it to lunch I was already tired of the whispers and looks. Even after years of being the Chosen One’s best friend, the whispers always get old quick.

“Don’t pay attention to them. They get some new bit of information and forget eventually” Lily said.

“Don’t worry, I’m no stranger to gossip.”

“Well, is it true then? Are you really his goddaughter?” James asked as the boys sat down.

“Sorry, Prongs has no tact-“ Remus began.

“Don’t worry about it. I had a friend who was the same way. And yes, to answer your question, I am.”

“Cool, so you can pull favoritism and get yours truly out of detention, right?”

“Sirius! How could you possibly think that! That detention is well deserved-“

“Evans, please, I was joking.” He said with a wink in my direction. I didn’t believe him in the slightest.

I watched as the boys inhaled their food in a manner that was reminiscent of the men in my time. Thoroughly amused, I continued to pick at my own plate. Nausea making it close to impossible to stomach anything. When I saw everyone start to get up I quickly picked up my bag and followed the rest of the Gryffindor seventh years to the Defense classroom.

“Merrythought’s a bit of a pushover, really. Nothing like her mother.” Remus whispered to me from his seat next to me. I’d read about her mother, Galatea. She taught many great wizards, Dumbledore and Voldemort himself included. I was looking forward to being taught by her descendant, but now I’m not so sure.

“It’s a shame really. She’s trying to follow such a huge legacy.” He concluded just as she walked through the doors.

“Alright class, all you’ll need today is your wands. Partner up. I want you to continue practicing strengthening your nonverbal shield.”

My nonverbal shields were actually fairly strong, I barely have to give it much thought anymore, it’s more like instinct now. Of course, I can’t necessarily advertise that now so when Remus sends me the first small stinging hex, purposefully let it pass unguarded. Remus immediately begins giving me pointers, proving what I already know of him being a great defense teacher. By the end of the lesson, I’d only blocked three hexes effectively placing me on par with the rest of the class.

By now the crowds of people have begun to suffocate me so I give the excuse of going to the hospital wing for pain potion and slip away to the astronomy tower instead to think.

Climbing the many steps up to the top, I fold my arms across my chest to fend off the chill in the autumn air and ponder this history this tower holds. Or will hold. Smuggling an illegal dragon, time-travel with a hippogriff and a “mass murderer”, many late night talks with Harry, deatheaters entering the school, Dumbledore’s death. I lean against the railing and look up into the sky where I know the dark mark would be. The wind blows and I shiver. I hear the creak of a floorboard behind me, interrupting my thoughts, I draw my wand and point it at the newcomer, curse on the tip of my tongue.

“I come in peace.” Sirius said holding up his hands in surrender.

I lowered my wand. Bloody war instincts. I sighed.

“What are you doing here, Sirius?” I asked tiredly.

“I could ask you the same thing.” He said coming to stand next to me at the railing. At my silence he continued. “When you didn’t come to class we got a little worried and went to find you.”

Or looked at a certain handy map, more like.

“I didn’t realize it was that late.” I said truthfully. I hadn’t realized.

“You also missed dinner. We have some food back in the common room, if you’re ready to head back?”

I nodded and followed him down the many steps.

“So why transfer from Beauxbatons?” He asked conversationally. “It can’t be the curriculum.”

“No, no, i-it was deatheaters, you see. My parents… they weren’t as lucky as ..as I was.” I schooled my features and balled my hands into fists to will the wave of grief down.

“I’m terribly sorry.” He whispered. It was a different sort of apology though, not the normal condolences you receive for a loss. No doubt he’s feeling responsible because of his family’s participation in such acts. I can’t mention any of this, however, so I simply just place a hand on his shoulder.

“It’s not your fault, don’t be sorry.” I look him in the eyes and saw his raw desperation.

“Thank you.”

* * *

**SIRIUS**

I’m not sure if she realizes the extent to what I’m thanking her for. Something in her demeanor makes want to tell her, despite barely knowing her. But she accepts me, even with my last name. My family could have taken part in causing her pain but she placed her hand on _my_ shoulder. My skin burned at her touch, lighting a fire inside of me and I knew I’d do anything to protect this girl and make her smile again. I wonder if this is what James feels like with Lily. That thought scares me out of my reverie and I say the password and we climbed in.

“There she is! I knew we were terrible, but did you have to run away that fast?” James laughed.

“Takes more than you four to drive me away. You’re just going to have to work harder.” She replied.

“Oh no, do you realize you just gave them permission?”

“Mooney, don’t act like you aren’t going to take part in this.”

“You better not prank her, James Potter!”

“Lily, love, you know I don’t make promises I can’t keep.”

Before Lily could hex James I drug Hermione over to the table where a bunch of sandwiches we collected from Kitchens earlier were.

“Here, I know you didn’t get dinner.”

“I’m actually not that hungry, in fact I think I might just go-“

“Oh no you don’t. You need to eat. Skipping meals isn’t healthy.” The sight of her scares me, like she is withering away before my eyes. I know she’s had it hard, that much is obvious but she barely touches any food at meals.

“Sirius. I don’t have an appetite to eat-“

“Yes and you never will if you continue to skive. Now come on. Just one?” I put on my best puppy dog eyes.

“Alright, fine.” She huffed and grabbed one. I smiled, she glared.

Satisfied, I led her over to the couch where the others were. We continued to talk about arbitrary topics. Hermione rarely spoke, only when addressed then she would return to her faraway look, similar to what I saw on the astronomy tower. I wonder what goes through her head.

She became more alert when we began to talk about the war.

“Did you hear? More muggles were found dead.” Lily spoke.

“How are they trying to cover it up this time?” Remus asked.

“They’re calling it a house fire.” James said with a steel voice. “Because the deatheaters used fiendfyre after they’d tortured the family just enough where they couldn’t escape but were still conscious. They burned them alive.”

“H-How do y-you know t-this?” Peter asks nervously. Fidgeting as he stuttered. I noticed Hermione stiffen next to me.

“Dad’s an auror. He was assigned the case.”

“I think that’s enough horror for one night.” I said effectively ending the conversation.

They tried to talk more but there was still an ever-present cloud over all of us. Then, closer to midnight, people started to head up to bed one at a time until it was just Hemione and I. I doubted she even realized, she was once again lost in thought. The fireplace was crackling embers.

“Why did you hold back?” I broke the comfortable silence. She jumped.

“What?”

“In class… Why did you hold back? I could tell you already knew the spells, why the façade?”

“Why the interrogation?” She immediately took the defensive.

“No interrogation, just curious. I can see you’re brilliant. Why hide it?”

She stared at me a long time before finally giving me an answer I didn’t expect.

“There’s a war outside these walls. In here, I don’t know who’s on what side. Anyone could be my next enemy once the year’s out. I felt it best not to put my potential on full display.”

“So element of surprise?” She nodded.

“See, I told you you were brilliant.”

And to my delight, she smiled.


	7. Chapter 7

**HERMIONE**

Over the next few weeks, 1977 started to feel like home. The Marauders and my dorm mates were very accepting and patient, even when I forgot the silencing charm on my bed. I studied with Remus and Lily in the library, let Marlene, Dorcas and Alice style my hair, turned a blind eye to James and Sirius’s pranks. I kept my nose down in classes, avoided Dumbledore’s curious stares, and stayed away from the Slytherins I knew to be deatheaters.

One night, in the beginning of November, I was lying in bed awake, breathing heavy from my nightmare, when I decided to go down to the common room and sit by the fire. It wasn’t until I was settled on the couch that I noticed I wasn’t alone.

“Sirius? What are you doing up? It’s half three.”

“Couldn’t sleep.” Was all he said while he continued to stare into the flames.

I was silently berating myself for not knowing how to help him when he broke the silence for me.

“Why don’t you take dreamless sleep anymore when you still have nightmares?”

“I was trying to get myself off the potion. Some nights I don’t have them, so it gave me hope. I’m sorry I woke you.” I explained feeling guilty.

“Don’t be sorry, I’m just worried is all. It seems terrible to go through everynight.”

“Yes, it is. But I don’t want to rely on a potion, that kind of weakness-“

“It’s not weakness, it’s healing. There will come a day when you won’t need it, believe me.” I didn’t get a chance to ponder this before I realize how close we’ve gotten. He takes a stray curl and wraps it around his finger before placing it behind my ear. “Never think you’re weak. You’re one of the strongest witches I know.” The tenderness in his voice makes my breath hitch and I clear my throat to get rid of the feeling.

“My cut has finally closed.” I say awkwardly. “No more stitches to claw out.” I laughed weakly.

He chuckles. “That’s great news, ‘Mione.”

I felt my tear ducts start to burn at the familiar nickname. I’m overcome with longing for Harry and Ron. For my brothers. For their familiar closeness. Before my tears could spill over, I buried my face into Sirius’s shoulder.

After recovering from his shock, he tentatively puts his arm around my shoulders, moving me closer where my face is now on his strong chest. I breathed in his scent and find that it’s exactly the same as it was in my time, leather and faint cigarette covered with expensive male cologne. A few tears leak out at this revelation. I opened my eyes half expecting the tattooed, tired, broken man with pain in his eyes, but instead I was met with silver eyes with flecks of blue that haven’t had everything taken from him …yet. More tears leaked out and he caught them with his thumb and brushed them away, whispering reassurances.

Eventually, I fell asleep dreaming of grey skies with blue peeking out between the clouds.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

I’ve never held a witch. Under any circumstance. I always kicked them out of bed and avoided them when they cried. But this witch, she had captivated me when our eyes first met weeks ago, and just now when her caramel eyes looked back at me with _so_ much pain and longing, I knew there was no rejecting her. She fought hard to keep her tears from coming, but when they did, and I was there to keep them from falling, it felt _good_. So I held her until she fell asleep and held her still. I didn’t have the heart to wake her. I hear her screams, I know she doesn’t sleep. So I let her rest on me.

When sunlight came through the windows, I figured it was probably time to wake her before people come down and get the wrong idea. So very gently I shook her shoulders.

Almost immediately she jumped into a standing position wand pointed directly at me. I didn’t even see her pull it out.

“Sorry” she mumbled and looked away a hint of pink touching her cheeks.

“S’alright I was just going to suggest we get ready. We have defense today.” I said standing up and stretching. She nodded and quickly made her way to the girls’ stairs. I smiled and shook my head before heading up to my own dorm. One quick glance told me Remus was the only one up. I turned and went into the bathroom to shower.

When I came out, James was up as well and Peter was nowhere to be seen.

“Where’s Wormtail?” I asked.

“I think the real question is where were you? You weren’t here when I woke up.”

“Really? Mate, don’t hold out. What’s her name?”

“Hermione. And it wasn’t anywhere close to what you’re thinking.”

“But it’s going in that direction.”

“What do you mean?” I asked immediately on guard.

“Please, Padfoot. You look at Hermione the same way James looks at Lily.”

“ _What_? You’re barmy.” I laughed.

“Actually Pads, I see it too. It doesn’t take a fool to see it.”

I looked back and forth from Remus to James a few times before turning around and heading for the door, school bag in hand.

“You’re all mad!” I exclaimed as I made my way down the stairs.

“Who’s mad?” Hermione. Perfect timing.

“Just James and Remus.” I said trying to sound as uninterested as possible.

“Ah, nothing out of the ordinary then.” We laughed.

* * *

The morning went by fast. Aside from a minor run in with Snivellus. Nothing too exciting. So natuarally all the Slytherins are where Gryffindor ties with mild sticking charms on them. When I walked into Defense and saw that all the desks were missing, my interest was thoroughly peaked.

“Alright, class, we’ve got a bit of a harder lesson today.” Marrythought said as she walked to the front of the room. “Who can tell me about the Patronus Charm?”

“Professor?” Some Gryffindor girl asked. “If it’s a charm, why are we learning it in Defense instead of Charms?”

Amusedly, I noted Hermione discreetly palm her face. No doubt she could already do this charm, just like everything else we work on. Once again I’m wondering who this girl is.

“Excellent question, that’s because it is actually one of the biggest defenses we can use. Who can tell me how? Miss Evans?”

“I protects the caster from dementors. The pure happiness that a patronus embodies scares away and can sometimes harm the creature.”

“Excellent! Ten points to Gryffindor. Now the reason this is such a hard charm to cast is because in any situation, you are to rely on quick thinking. This charm needs a strong enough memory in order to produce a patronus. It needs to be the happiest memory you have. Now who can tell me the incantation? Mr. Potter?”

“Expecto Patronum.”

“Correct, ten points! Now get to work!”

As everyone scrambled and began spouting the incantation fruitlessly, I watched Hermione look around at everyone before she waved her wand in the complete incorrect pattern. So I was correct, she can cast it. I wonder if I’ll get to see hers today.

I start thinking of happy memories. Nothing from my childhood, nothing involving Regulus. I think of my first quidditch match playing as a beater.

Nothing.

Winning the quidditch cup.

The tip glowed blue.

Finally completing my animagus transformation.

A faint, white tendril seeped out.

Being accepted as a son by James’s parents.

A few more wisps few out.

Caramel eyes.

The tendrils began taking a shape.

Sitting by the fire, holding a witch, her head buried in my chest, brown curls smelling of vanilla and roses.

A giant white dog- no _grim_ flew out of my wand and ran around the room tripping people as he went. I started laughing. I got a look at Remus’s horrified look as a wolf jumped out of his wand. I found Peter giggling at a tiny rat scuttling around him. I saw a white version of Prongs run by me only for me to wonder where his antlers were. When I looked at James he was staring open mouthed at Lily who mirrored his expression. An antlerless Prongs standing next to her and actual Prongs standing next to James. I laughed harder. Then I saw a white otter float by. I looked around for who cast it only to see Hermione with a genuine smile lighting her features following it with her eyes. I watched as a lone tear made its way down her cheek.

“Alright class, I’m seeing some wonderful work. Let’s talk theory. When two people’s patronus are compliments of each other, it is said that the two people themselves complement each other and are, in the basic form of the word, soulmates.” I disguised a laugh as cough and looked over at James and Lily who were blushing furiously and avoiding each other’s eyes. “When a person goes through an extremely happy emotional upheaval, such as falling in deeply love with someone, a person’s patronus can change to match that of the person they are in love with. Now as I said before, it takes a happy memory to create a patronus. Sometimes happiness can be substituted for obsession if the person is a recurring thought or presence in your life. If that happens then your patronus is the same as that person’s. Not to be confused with a changed patronus. However, some argue that love is the same as obsession.”

With that the bell rang leaving everyone to contemplate the meaning of their patronus.

* * *

Later on that evening when I walked into the common room I noticed a distinct lack of red hair hexing black. I walked over to where my friends are sitting.

“Where’s James and Lily? I asked sitting down.

“I can only hope they’re off somewhere talking about their patronus.”

“More like snogging.” Remus said with a laugh. I turned my head to the portrait where James just walked in hair messier than usual hand in hand with Lily who was trying discreetly to smooth down her blouse.

Someone gave a wolf whistle and the whole common room erupted into cheering and clapping. As Lily’s face turned a brighter red she quickly hid in the crook of James’s neck. When they joined our group, I looked over at everyone else. Remus and Peter were smiling slyly exchanging galleons. Marlene, Dorcas and Alice were going on about marriage plans. Hermione was observing the couple with a sad smile, another tear sliding down her cheek.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

The days since the patronus lesson flew by. James and Lily became closer than anyone thought possible. I suppose there really was a fine line between love and hate. Watching my best friend’s parents come together made me feel guilty but pleased at the same time. Guilty because Harry deserves to see this, and pleased because it means I haven’t changed much of the future and my best friend will actually exist. Sirius and I hadn’t talked about the night I fell asleep in his arms. I felt embarrassed, I don’t usually throw myself at anyone when I’m upset, but something in his eyes made me trust him.

“Are you going to Hogsmeade with us today?” Lily asked one morning at breakfast.

“No, I have a meeting with Professor Dumbldore and then I have some homework to finish up in the library.” It wasn’t a complete lie, I did have a meeting.

“Oh well that’s a shame, I wanted to show you some of the shops there. You’ll see us off though, right?” Sirius asked.

I nodded. He smiled. My stomach flipped. I marked it down as nausea.

After breakfast I followed the small group to the front doors and told them to have a good time. When a blonde witch I recognized as a Ravenclaw ran past me into Sirius’s arms. I felt a confusing pang. When she took his hand and started dragging him out toward the carriages, I recognized the feeling as the same way I felt in sixth year when Lavender kissed Ron. At the thought of Ron I felt tears welling up and rushed away toward the headmaster’s office, not seeing the confused look on Sirius and the aggravated looks on Remus and James’s.

* * *

Before I even sat down in the chair across from my “godfather” I knew I would not like this conversation.

“Ah Miss Granger, a pleasure to see you, my dear.” He said with a distinct lack of twinkle.

“You as well, Headmaster.”

“How have you been settling in?”

“Well, sir.”

“Too well, I’m afraid.” This caught me off guard.

“Sir?”

“I know you had something to do with Mr. Potter and Miss Evans’s relationship. I also see how close you are to Mr. Black. May I remind you of the importance of meddling with time?”

“Sir, I haven’t done anything but be respectfully distant. And to tell you the truth, I have changed anything. James and Lily were together in my timeline as well.”

“Maybe so but I can already see the ways your presence may affect things.”

“With all due respect sir, I think I’m the only one with that capability seeing as how I am the one who actually knows what happens.” I said coldly.

“I think we’re done here, Miss Granger.” He said turning away.

I stood up and quickly left his office slamming the door as I went. Who was he to decide? Time theory hasn’t been introduced yet but he has he gall to try to lecture me? I kept walking angrily not paying attention to where I was going until I heard a voice behind me.

“Mudblood!” Oh this should be fun. “Where’s you valiant, Gryffindor protectors?” Malfoy sneered in a manner that resembled his son.

“Oh don’t you know? The bloodtraitors are off fucking other mudbloods leaving this one for our pleasure.” Mulciber leered. I’d heard hushed conversations about the kind of torture he dealt involving a very different wand. The kind of torture I definitely don’t want to be a part of.

“Dolohov, hold her down.” I felt arms grab me from behind. I struggled. Mulciber slapped me. I felt blood fill my mouth and spit in his face.

“How does it feel,” I asked feeling adrenaline rush through me. “having my filthy blood on your fucking face.”

“Fucking face? Sweetheart with a filthy mouth like that you be seeing my _fucking face_ real soon.” He smiled slowly and ran a finger down my face before he gripped my chin and forced me to look at him. The next thing I knew his mouth was on mine. I had to suppress the urge to vomit so I could get my wand down my sleeve and into my hand. When I felt the familiar wood in my hand, I bit his lip _hard_. When I tasted blood I let go and sent a nonverbal slicing hex towards his crotch. By the sound he made, I hit my mark. I elbowed Dolohov in the chin to get free and dodged a curse that missed me but hit him. I quickly rounded on Malfoy who was standing to the side watching earlier but now had his wand out. I sent a successful petrification charm his way but not before he got a slicing hex on my thigh.

Satisfied the boys were in no shape to follow or do more damage, smugly noting the red slain on the front of Mulciber’s trousers, I walked away toward Gryffindor tower ignoring the pain in my leg and face. When I made it to the common room, it was, thankfully, empty.

I slowly sat down on a couch and lit the fireplace. I pulled out the beaded bag I always carry with me and pulled out dittany, murtlap essence, and bandages. I had just put the first drop of dittany on my leg before he portrait opened and the Marauders as well as my friends walked in laughing. Everyone stopped when they saw me. Then the questions started coming all at once.

“Who did-“

“Why is your face-“

“What did they do-“

“-should’ve never left you alone-“

“GUYS!” They all looked at me. “I’m fine.”

“Who did this to you? We’ll hex them.”

“You don’t have to, Sirius, I took care of it. Now, come here and help me with this dittany. It’s at an odd ang-“

“What do you mean you took care of it?” James interrupted as Sirius began healing me.

“Malfoy is petrified indefinitely, Dolohov got his with some dark curse- Not because of me! And Mulciber got a slicing hex to his cock.” When I finished everyone looked at me with shocked expressions.

“ _Fucking_ hell nice work, love.” I blushed under Sirius’s praise as James brought me in a side-hug.

“Yeah, Hermione, normally I don’t condone hexing slytherins but-“

“Wait, wait, wait. You’ve been allowing me to teach you in defense but you didn’t even need it?!” Remus asked cutting Lily off.

“Yeah sounds about right.” I said and everyone started laughing.

“Then why did you let me?” He asked between laughs.

“You’re a great teacher. Even if _I_ don’t need it.”

“Funny you should say that, I’ve actually thought about teaching.”

“Oh Remus, you’d be a perfect teacher!”

“Yeah… Well, what about you Lily? What do you want to do after Hogwarts?”

“I’ve always been interested in potions… but I’m also thinking about being a healer.”

I raised a questioning eyebrow at Sirius and James.

“I want to be an auror, like my dad.” James said proudly.

“I want to be an auror with James and bring in my fucked up family.” Sirius said, just as proud. “What about you, ‘Mione?”

“Oh, ever since fourth year, I’ve want to work at the ministry in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures branch.” I said slowly, noticing the Mauraders holding their breath.

“Any particular creature, love?” I could sense his apprehension.

“Werewolves.”


	8. Chapter 8

**SIRIUS**

I figured this conversation would come up. I didn’t expect it this soon and definitely not in this way. This is the conversation that will inevitably decide our friendship. I’ve always been known for my fierce protectiveness over my friends, some even say I’m reckless about it, but Remus has had a hard enough life already aside from the discriminative laws against him. So naturally, I’m on the fence, waiting with a baited breath to see what she says.

“Okay, I know what you’re thinking.” Not bloody likely. “But I actually want to change the laws regarding werewolves.”

“And why would you want to do that? Those laws keep us safe.” Dorcas has always been partial to werewolves. Greyback slaughtered her little brother a few years back. Even though her comments hurt Remus, we understand.

“Those laws are barbaric.” Hermione’s voice took a defensive tone. I noticed my brothers releasing the breath they were holding.

“Those laws keep _monsters_ away from civilized people!” Dorcas became hysterical. “Monsters like Greyback.” She spat.

Hermione immediately understood. Her voice took a deathly quiet tone. “Greyback is a monster, I’ll give you that.” Dorcas laughed humorlessly but before she could start in again, Hermione continued. “But you can’t discriminate a whole community because of the acts of one.”

Everyone was quiet, contemplating her words.

“But you don’t think werewolves are monsters? They eat humans, they hunt them.” Remus baited.

“Maybe one night a month they are, when they aren’t in their right mind.”

“So what’s in it for you? Changing the laws, if you can even get them passed?” James’s curiosity taking over.

“I had a friend once.” She began, once again taking on that faraway look. “I watched him suffer in ways surpassing the trials of his transformation. I saw the clothes he wore that were more like rags because that’s all he could afford. I watched him get sacked because people found out his secret. I watched him suffer full transformations without the potion because he couldn’t afford-“

“What potion?” Remus asked. She looked startled, then she paled. She obviously didn’t mean to say this.

“I-it’s c-called Wolfsbane Potion. I-it allowed him to k-keep his mind during t-transformations.”

“Why haven’t we heard of it? Shouldn’t it be on the market?” Lily asked.

“It was more of a personal thing, I used to brew it for him. I spent years researching.” She said uncertainly.

“Why don’t you patent it? If it’s as effective as you say, this could definitely help other werewolves.” James said hotly. No doubt he was thinking of Mooney.

“I want to change the laws first.” When James started to interrupt, she cut him off again. “No, think about it. The laws right now are so discriminative that the ministry would fully control the distribution of the potion holding it at a high price and making it that much more unattainable.” She took a breath before continuing in quieter tone. “Not to mention Voldemort has been gaining werewolves for his cause. Werewolves that don’t want to keep their minds on a full moon. And with his influence in the ministry officials, he would “promise” the potion only to those that join him. And I would be a target because I came up with the potion.”

After her speech, we all lapsed into silence. Once again there was a cloud over the group like there is anytime we talk about the war. I’m also, once more, speechless at her sheer brilliance and compassion. This witch can brew such a complex potion and for what? Just so her friend can suffer a little less? And the way she talked about the war with such tactical objectiveness that reminds me of James’s breakfast planning plates. Brilliant. And I tell her so and smile when she blushes ever so slightly.

We continue to sit there by the fire well into the night. No one talked, but no one had to. We were content to sit there with our thoughts. I started to contemplate my role in all of this. Obviously, I want to fight. I’ve wanted to fight since my mother berated me for being sorted into Gryffindor. Now that the fight is here, I’m taking a step back to look. It’s no longer just pranking the Slytherin’s robes a different color. It’s dark curses and death. It’s real.

I looked at Marlene and Dorcas, no doubt they’re fighting for they’re families. Peter, I’d hope he’s fighting for us, he was never close with his family. Remus as well, fighting for his friends that became his family. Lily, despite her sister’s hatred, she’s still fighting for her family. Alice has a fiancé to fight for. James, well, he’s been fighting since first year for Lily. I wonder what I’m fighting for. One look at the girl with brown curls tells me everything I need to know. What does she have left to fight for? She’s lost everything, and I’d kill to be her anything.

This onslaught of emotion jars me and I quickly stand up excusing myself to go up to my dorms. Footsteps behind me let me know I was followed.

“How’d you know, Prongs?” I ask. My confusion getting the better of me.

“Know what?” He seems just as confused.

“Know that Lily was _it_?” I saw Remus’s smug expression as he busied himself with turning down his covers.

“What?” Merlin the boy is oblivious.

“Nevermind.” I said quickly.

“No, no, no, you’re not getting out of this one, Padfoot.” He turned to James. “What he means is, how did you know that Lily is the only one for you?”

“Easy. Her green eyes captivated me and I knew I die before I let their fire go out.” He got a dumbstruck smile on his face before snapping out of it. “Wait Pads, did you find a girl?”

I opened my mouth to shut him up but he cut me off. “Is it Hermione? Have you finally admitted it to yourself?”

“ _What?_ No, no you’ve got the wrong idea-“

“Good, so you wouldn’t mind if I date her then?” Remus asked.

Before I could stop myself I growled.

“Ah, so you would mind.” He laughed.

“I do not fancy Hermione.” I said pointedly.

“Aw, Mooney we were so close.”

“He’s almost there don’t worry.”

“Nah, what I am worried about, however, where Peter is. I haven’t seen him all day.”

I cleared my throat ignoring their discussion. “So Mooney tell me, when are you going to ask Hermione if she’ll brew that potion for you?”

“Yeah, mate, it seems like it’d be worth it.”

“No, no I can’t ask her to do that. You heard her, the ingredients are probably too expensive and I’d have to tell her-“

“I’m pretty sure she already knows.” James interjected.

“Yeah, considering how smart she is, she probably figured it out immediately.”

“Not to mention the friend she had. She probably knew what to look for.”

By this point Remus had grown pale and started trembling, all too reminiscent of when we confronted about his secret our second year.

“Mate, she’ll keep your secret, and she’s definitely not afraid. I’ll bet she’d even be delighted to help.” James said softly trying to comfort him. It’s times like these when I wonder why we had to grow up so quick. Remus looked so much like a scared little boy it was heartbreaking. No kid should have to go through any of this.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right.” He said slowly.

“Of course I’m right, I always am.” We laughed.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

It was a few weeks before Remus sought me out. A few days after the latest full moon he found me in the middle of the night perched by the window in the common room staring out into the night sky.

“I was wondering when you’d come find me.” I said with a small smile, still looking out over the grounds. At his silence, I continued.

“You know I can never sleep on full moons. I’m too worried for my friend. Despite the distance I still know he’s out there, suffering. So I stare at the moon.”

When I finally looked at him he had a sheepish, apologetic look on his face. His face distinctly resembled his future counterpart. He still had calculating blue eyes and sandy, shaggy hair. The only difference was the haunted look marring his features and the multiple scars he’ll acquire from facing the moon alone. Even now he’s added a pink mark on the left side of his face from the previous moon. One more to the ever-growing collection.

“So you know then?” He said more as a statement than a question.

“Hard not to when you know the signs.” We fell into a comfortable silence. We sat for a long while just looking at the black velvet sky.

I broke the silence when I fumbled around in my pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He gave me a curious look when I handed it to him.

“The aconite and dittany I can get easily from Slughorn’s storage, the powdered silver, you’ll have to ask James or Sirius to get because you can’t touch it and it’s rather expensive and I know for a fact they’d love to help out, on the next Hogsmeade weekend I can get a good stock of valerian root from an apothecary and the rest of the ingredients can easily be harvested from the greenhouses.”

At his silence I went on with my ramblings. “I can even teach Lily how to brew it, she does well in potions and she wants to be a heal-“ I was cut off when he hugged me.

My breathing hitched slightly at the feel of arms restraining me. I forced myself to taking calming breaths and realize that it’s just Remus. Slowly, I put my arms around him and returned the embrace. I felt a tear make its way down my cheek as I remembered Harry and Ron’s hugs. I quickly abated the unwanted thoughts and focused on the werewolf currently seeking comfort.

“Thank you.” He choked.

* * *

As December rolled around and I lie in bed awake from another nightmare, I began to contemplate my existence in this timeline. I know that by brewing the potion for Remus I am changing the future slightly. Despite my reasonable explanation for not patenting the potion, it was really only an excuse because I’d actually feel guilty if I were to take the credit for Damocles’s work. I started to think about Dumbledore’s words about protecting the timeline. I can never get back to my own time, so I am effectively a part of this one. What do I want to do with this information? Or more basically, what do I want? An image of raven hair and grey eyes flashed across my thoughts involuntarily. Panicking I got up from my bed and quickly made my way down the stairs and through the portrait.

Lost in thought once more, I didn’t realize where my feet were taking me until I was in front of a door that resided in the depths of the dungeons. I recognized this door. Harry told me about his late night escapades in first year. Carefully, I stepped inside. Maybe I’ll be able to get answers.

As I approached the ornate mirror, I took the time to carefully read the engravings.

_erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi_

Gathering my courage, I looked at my reflection. I noticed myself free of scars, light in my eyes again, smooth left arm. And then Ron and Harry walked over to me and placed their hands on my shoulders and I swore I could _feel_ it. Then my parents walked up behind me and smiled with a look in their eye telling me they remembered me. The Weasley family followed shortly after. And then an older looking Remus wearing his teaching robes. And then a tattooed, attractive, older looking Sirius stepped up next to him and threw his arm around his friend laughing.

My knees buckled and I fell to the floor sobbing because I’ll never see them again. They’ll never look at me the same way again. I was thoroughly alone. I sobbed louder. And then I screamed in anguish and loss for my family.

Then I felt arms around me and I stiffened. I looked up to see Sirius looking at me with concern written in his grey irises. I threw my arms around his waist and buried my face into his chest. I was too distraught to be embarrassed. I felt his arms tighten around me and he began petting me hair. He pulled me into his lap and gently rocked back and forth burying his face in my hair and whispering reassurances to try to calm me down. And there on the floor in an unused classroom, Sirius held me while I cried.

Long after I had cried my last tear, I was still in his lap enjoying just being held for once. I avoided looking into the mirror after that because I didn’t want to feel the pain of loss anymore.

“What were you doing here” I croaked, my voice raw from crying.

“I could asked you the same question.” At my glare, he laughed. “Alright, alright. I was sitting in the common room and saw you run to the portrait. Thoroughly intrigued as to what had your knickers in a twist, I followed you.”

I nodded.

“Now, would you care to tell me what’s so horrible about our reflection that it had you crying and screaming? Because I know I don’t look _that_ awful.” He said with a laugh. I didn’t answer him but the sound of his heartbeat in my ear was lulling me to sleep.

“Or maybe it was the little girl with black curly hair running around. Because I can’t seem to find her anywhere.” But I was already asleep and didn’t hear him.

* * *

In the weeks following that night, I grew closer to Sirius. He would walk with me to classes, sit by me at meals, and a few times I even got him to go to the library. He’d always make sure I got enough snacks while studying and I made sure he actually did his homework on time. It was a comfort that was foreign to me in 1977 but it was welcome nonetheless.

When the next full moon rolled around on the day after a Hogsmeade trip, I started to make a plan to get the ingredients. I was to sneak in to Slughorn’s private stores after class on Friday, then on Saturday, I’d stop by an apothecary in the village. I asked Sirius and James to harvest some ingredients from the greenhouses in secret and they were all too happy to comply.

Sirius was overjoyed I was actually going into Hogsmeade instead of staying cooped up in the library studying. And even more so when I told him how I managed to steal from Slughorn. He pulled me into every store we walked past and despite already knowing the village well, I enjoyed his tour. He even bought me chocolate at Honeydukes and he didn’t complain when I drug him through Scrivenshaft’s just like I didn’t complain when he drug me through Zonko’s. I was even able to finish Christmas shopping for everyone.

When we all met up at the Three Broomsticks, everyone had smiles on their faces. Over a few rounds of butterbeer we joked about various things ranging from James and Lily practically being stuck together with a sticking charm to the girl that was so obviously following Remus around.

“So, ‘Mione,” James began. “I talked to my parents and they said you’re officially invited to my house for Christmas and New Years.”

I nearly choked on my drink. “Wh-What? No, no. I can’t possibly-”

“Nonsense, we’d love to have you everyone else will be there.”

“I’m perfectly fine staying at the castle, thank you.”

“Love, we know _you’re_ fine with it but the rest of us aren’t.”

Everyone at the table gave noises of affirmation.

“Besides, Christmas is a time to be with family,” Sirius continued. “And you’re family.”

A slow, watery smile started to grace my features. I nodded and they cheered.

Yes, these people _are_ my family.

* * *

The walk back to the castle was wet and cold and met with laughter. Sirius and James charmed snowballs to follow the Slytherins and that turned into an all-out snowball war. The war grew until all houses were present and even a few professors. Once people started leaving to go warm up, we were all that was left, James and Sirius continued as if their life depended on it. So Lily and I took it upon ourselves to end it. Making eye-contact with Lily, she nodded and together we dropped our levitation charm that was holding a huge roll of snow over the boys who, once they got over their sputtering and shivering, tackled both of us into a snow bank. Thoroughly soaked, we called it a day and sludged back to the common room to warm up by the fire after stopping by the kitchen for hot chocolate.

After warming up and chatting with everyone, I announced I was tired and headed up to my dorm. Once there I lit a fire under my portable cauldron and began making the potion for Remus. I was once again bombarded with my conflicting views on messing with the timeline, but then I thought of how much this would help Remus and I quickly threw the negative thoughts out the window. When I heard my roomates about to make their entrance, I quickly bottled up the potion, vanished the excess, and pulled my bed hangings closed.

I woke up early that morning and headed over to the boys dorms to find Remus. I didn’t bother to knock so when I opened the door and was met with four unconscious boys, I sighed in relief. I wasn’t hard to find Remus’s bed as his was the only one whose area was actually clean. I was halfway to his bed when I stopped. I looked at the owner of the bed I was in front of with utter disgust. I know the others notice when he’s not around but I hate that I’m only one who knows where he goes. When I see Peter trembling, I smile. I allow myself to ponder what he did wrong in order to receive the cruciatus.

“’Mione?” Sirius asked in a voice that was thick with sleep. “Whaddar you doing here?”

He doesn’t wear a shirt to bed. Oh, Merlin.

“J-just giving Remus his potion.”

“Oh.” He stretched. I blushed and looked away. He chuckled.

I cleared my throat. “So I’ll just give this to-“ I noticed Remus was now awake and watching the exchange with a smug expression. “I’ll see you at breakfast.” And with that I fled the room.

* * *

Later on that night, I sat up in the common room and watched out the window as a stag, dog, and rat ran off into the forest chasing after a humane werewolf. I smiled. At some point I fell asleep with my head against the glass.

I was shaken out of my dreams when the portrait hole opened and no one was there. When they took off the invisibility cloak, I locked eyes with Remus and he sprinted across the room, threw his arms around me hugging me fiercely, and cried.

“Thank you.” He managed.


	9. Chapter 9

**SIRIUS**

Sitting in the compartment on the Hogwart’s express surrounded by my friends, I thought about how truly lucky I was to have them in my life. Not a day goes by that I don’t appreciate James’s parents for taking me in. I can only imagine what Christmas would be like at Gimmauld this year. When I’d heard the rumors that Regulus was to take the mark over the break, I broke my fist on a wall and broke everything in sight. It took Both James and Remus to hold me back. After that I stayed up staring at the flames in the fireplace feeling numb. Thinking about the fanfare that would be going on in his celebration was making me sick. He will always be my little brother, even if he plays the perfect Black Heir so well.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and saw James with an understanding look on his face. No doubt he knows the direction my thoughts took me. That’s the thing about James, he knows. I never have to explain myself to him. We were brothers long before his family took me in. That just solidified the fact.

I turned to ask ‘Mione about her past Christmases only to find her trembling with nerves and wringing her hands, verging on tears. Something tells me asking about her past will only upset her more.

“Oh, ‘Mione you don’t have to worry. They’re excited to see you.” I tried to distract her.

“Oh! I.. I just- oh, what if they don’t like me?” She took the scapegoat.

“My parents will love you! I mean they took in Sirius and he’s a total dog.”

“You know, Prongs, I’m not very fawn-d of you right now.”

Hermione started giggling like mad. I wonder if she’s figured this secret out as well. Probably.

“Subtle you two” Remus said, not looking up from his book.

* * *

When we got off the train we drug our luggage over to where James’s parents were and watched amusedly as James officially met Mr. Evans. The nervousness was practically radiating off of him. After some thorough teasing, we prepared to apperate. Since Hermione had never visited, I offered to side-along.

Upon arrival I immediately looked at her facial expression as she took in the sight of Potter Manor. Her childlike excitement plain as day on her face made me smile.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” She asked.

“Absolutely.” I breathed still staring at her. She turned her head to look at me.

“Cheeseball.” She laughed and lightly slapped my arm.

“Well, if you’re done making our guest uncomfortable, Sirius, I’d very much like an introduction.” A new voice added.

“Sorry, mum.” I said sheepishly and cleared my throat. “Mum, this is Hermione Granger, Hermione, Dorea Potter.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Potter.” Hermione said formally.

“Please, call me mum. As much as you hang around my boys, you might as well be my daughter.”

“Alright… mum.” She said with a small smile.

“You’ll have to meet Charlus, my husband, at dinner. He’s currently working a case. Might as well call him dad as well.”

With that we’d made it to the front doors. Remus immediately stole her away to look at the library and I went with James to take our trunks up to our rooms. Once there, we congregated on his bed and started chatting away like old times. When we were younger we’d sit and talk and try to see who could stay up the latest. In the end we’d both lose, but we’d be so determined. We’d talk about anything under the sun and then we added Moony and Wormtail into our bed conversations. Prank ideas of our early years turned into the discussion of shaggable girls when we hit puberty and then turned towards the war and what we’d do.

“You ever think there’s something …off about Hermione?” James asks hesitantly.

“What do you mean?”

“I know she told us her parents were killed by deatheaters, but I can’t help but think her experience with the war is that …innocent? Is that the word?”

“You think she’s involved with dark arts?” I asked incredulously.

“No, no, I mean- …just-“ He sighed. “Pads, she has an arsenal of curses we’ve never learned or come across in books, she knows healing spells no one should _ever_ have to use, you saw how deathly sick she looked when she first got here, and her scars… there’s something about her.”

“Maybe she’s just had to grow up faster than we did. I don’t know, but when she’s comfortable enough to tell us, I’ll be there, I don’t want to push her.”

We were silent for a minute.

“You really care for her don’t you?”

“Yeah.” I said softly. There wasn’t a point in denying it. I did.

* * *

Later that night, I was woken up by the sound of screaming and immediately shot out of bed and ran toward Hermione’s room.

She lay there thrashing, back arching off the bed, clawing at the place I know her newly healed scar to be. I rushed over to her bedside.

“NO! It’s a fake- a FAKE!” She screamed more. I tried to shake her shoulders.

“No, please, stay away!” She whimpered, tears began streaming down her face. Her mouth hung open in a silent scream and she started choking. I shook her shoulders harder and called her name trying to get her to wake up.

When she finally opened her eyes and gasped in a breath, my heart broke at the terror and helplessness still blazing in her caramel orbs.

“Sirius?” She asked weakly before breaking down into sobs and the girl I’d seen repeatedly shy away from everyone’s touch wasted no time throwing herself into my arms for the third time since her arrival. I pulled her into my lap, sat against the headboard and ran my fingers through her soft curls repeatedly letting her know that I was there. I looked at the door and found all the inhabitants of the house looking on with mixed looks of sympathy and tenderness.

After a while she’d calmed down and the others had long since left to go back to bed. I continued to stroke her hair and felt content holding her in my arms. I wondered if there’d ever be a time when I hold her and she isn’t crying.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” I whispered into her hair.

She shook her head _hard_. “Okay, okay, we’ll just sit here.” She nodded and moved to where her head rested just above where my heart lies.

Eventually her breathing evened out and I moved us to where we lied under the covers, still holding her close and eventually fell asleep with the smell of vanilla and roses filling my nose.

* * *

With the days following, I was pleased to note there was no awkwardness between us despite waking up spooning like we’d been married for years. I’d never woken up next to a witch before and to my surprise, I didn’t mind. The new feeling this witch has been giving me have been confusing. I refused to analyze what this means but really, I knew what it meant. And I was terrified.

When Charlus called James and I into his office, it only made me even more scared.

“Boys, I know by now you understand there’s a war out there. Hell, you practically grew up on it.” He began. “I know you want to fight, and I’m not going to stop you. I’m just going to tell you to be careful”

“I think we understand-“ James started.

“No, you don’t. James, Sirius, I don’t expect to come out the other side of this war.” At our surprised looks, he pressed on. “But I intend to do everything I can to protect you and your mother before I meet my end.”

We were speechless.

“You’ve both found good witches. Good _muggleborn_ witches. Don’t think I didn’t notice Hermione’s arm the other night. You both need to be prepared to do everything in your power to keep them safe. Especially if that means putting yourself in front of a curse.”

He poured us both a round of firewhiskey.

“I’d do it.” James said. “I’d do it in a heartbeat.” I believed him.

“Me too.” I said finally.

He poured us another round.

* * *

The days leading up to Christmas were always my favorite. Dorea would bake with the house elves and set out homemade treats while the rest of us decorated and sang Christmas carols. James and I taking to more dramatic performances while Remus and Peter took to the actual decorating. When Lily showed up, the performances found an actual- though reluctant- audience. Hermione stood to the sidelines watching everyone with a huge smile that was contageous. So without further ado, I danced over to her held her around the waist and dipped her, catching her off guard. When she began to laugh I brought her up and led her around in a quick waltz running into everyone we could.

When everyone was bent over holding their sides with laughter at the childish ridiculousness of the situation, we stopped and caught our breath. Once we’d stood up, we noticed everyone smiling at us. I shared a look with Hermione to confirm she was just as confused. Then Remus, the smug bastard, pointed to the area above our heads. We looked up and saw a green sprig with white berries. We both blushed and looked away. Everyone laughed.

“Did you know mistletoe is actually poisonous? It’s the key ingredient in-“ I cut off her ramblings with a kiss.

It was a short kiss. Very chaste, very gentile. But I was wrecked. As soon as our lips met they began to burn and tingle. They were on fire, but they were ice cold. My senses were on overload. I could taste her nervousness and shock. I could smell the vanilla and roses I’d come to love. I was drowning and I didn’t want air.

I was caught, once again, by the fire in her caramel eyes. I gave her a nervous smile. She smiled back. I was done for.

* * *

Later that night we were sitting by the fireplace. I was a particularly cold night. Snow was falling and frost was covering the windows. We sat with hot cups of cocoa the house elves made us. Everyone else had gone to bed so I decided to ask a question I’d been very curious about.

“What’s your favorite memory of Christmas?”

She was quiet for a long time. I was about to ask again when she spoke.

“My fifth year, I’d spent half the break skiing with my parents, but I left early and went to spend Christmas with my friend’s family. We were actually at his godfather’s house and he was so overjoyed to have people over, he was singing carols and throwing decorations at anything that moved.” She finished with a watery smile.

“Sounds like something James and I would do.” I smiled thinking about earlier that day.

“Yeah, it was.” She said wiping her eyes. “What about you? What’s your favorite memory?”

“Every Christmas at the Potter’s is special. But this one might be ranking up there.” She smiled.

We were silent for a long time before she excused herself to go to sleep.

I stayed for a while longer thinking again. I tend to do that a lot now since she came into my life. Eventually I grew tired as well and headed up to my own bed. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

I was startled awake and immediately grabbed my wand from under my pillow and pointed it at my offender.

“I was just going to tell you Merry Christmas and that you should come downstairs.” James said slowly, hands up in surrender.

Bloody instincts. “I’ll be down in a minute. Sorry. Merry Christmas.” I smiled apologetically.

Once he’d left I quickly got dressed and went downstairs. I felt a little guilty when I saw everyone waiting for me around the tree.

“Don’t even think about apologizing, I know that look.” Lily said pointing a finger at me. I stuck tongue out at her and sat down in-between Remus and Sirius.

As I carefully ripped the paper on my presents I watched Sirius and James amusedly as they tore through theirs with child-like grins on their face.

I got some pretty nice gifts from everyone. Mostly books but they also got me some candy as well.

When I felt an arm around my shoulders I looked confused at Sirius before I saw what he was holding.

“Thanks, love.” He said putting on his new leather jacket.

I gave him a smile and unwrapped my last present witch was a another book this time from Sirius. “ _The Most Important Constellations in our Universe”_ Interest peaked, I opened the book only to find that every page was a picture of Canis Major.

“Well, you’re nothing if not modest.” I deadpanned before hitting him in the shoulder with the book.

“Alright, alright! Here’s your real present.” He fished around in his pockets before producing a small velvet box.

I opened it and gasped. It was a gold bracelet with the constellation for Canis Major interrupting the chain. There was a tiny ruby glinting in the place where the star Sirius should be.

“Thank you.” I said hugging him. I let him fasten it around my wrist.

“No problem, love. Merry Christmas, Hermione.”

“Merry Christmas, Sirius.”

I looked around at everyone and saw the love and compassion from everyone in the room. Despite the war raging outside, they are content to just be with each other. I felt a pang when I thought of what fate has in store for them. None of these people deserve this. _So change it_. I thought involuntarily. What if I did? I thought of Dumbledore’s warning. If I can’t go back anyway, then why shouldn’t I change everything? I already lost one family, I don’t think I could survive losing another. Besides, I know the key to destroying the man responsible.

* * *

After Christmas, once we were back, things more or less fell back into routine. I still kept my head down in class, the boys pranked Slytherins, The Daily Profit gave bad news, Peter still disappeared, Lily and James were disgustingly adorable. I still studied with Remus and Sirius still looked out for my well-being. I was glad our kiss didn’t change anything. I’d hate to add complexity to our close familiarity.

Everything was normal until one day toward the end of January.

We walked into our defense class and as soon as I saw the desks and chairs gone and the cabinet in the front of the room I started panicking. Surely they don’t teach boggarts to _seventh_ years. Surely this is a mistake, it has to be.

“Alright class,” Professor Merrythought said grabbing my attention. “I know you have already been taught how to deal with boggarts, but you were third years. By now I’m certain most of your fears have changed and most likely gotten worse. Today’s lesson is not about dealing with a boggart, it is about dealing with the worst and keeping a level head. I’m sure you all remember the drill, line up.” She said taking post by the cabinet doors.

I quickly scrambled to the back of the line. Maybe if I’m lucky we’ll run out of time.

I felt my hope dwindling as people dealt with their boggart with ease. Acromatulas, Hippogriffs, mummies, dead family member, a green curse flying their way, nothing too horrible. James’s was Lily’s dead body. Lily’s was her muggle home burnt to the ground before it changed to James’s dead body. Remus’s, as predicted, was the moon. Sirius’s was his mother yelling at his and his father cursing him before it changed to a boy that looked like he could be a slightly younger version of Sirius. Except he was wearing Slytherin robes and his sleeve was rolled up where you could see the dark mark. Regulus. I knew Sirius’s worst fear had already happened.

A few more people went before it was my turn. I took a deep breath but nothing could prepare me.

The boggart changed to take the form of the lifeless bodies of Harry and Ron, blood leaking out from underneath them. When I went to cast, it changed again.

Finir Greyback. He stalked toward me. “Ah, we meet again, my pet. Didn’t have enough last time?” He pointedly looked over my body. “Are you going to let me have a taste?” He licked his lips and began unbuckling his belt. “No.” I whispered. “Aw, don’t be like that. I know what that mudblood mouth is good for.”

It changed again. Bellatrix, holding a silver knife, tip soaked in blood. My knees buckled, I fell to the floor. “Now, are you going to tell me where you got that sword?!” She shrieked. “It’s a fake.” I whispered. “LIES. CRUCIO!” Despite it being a boggart my body still trembled. I screamed. “Tell me, Mudblood! What were you doing in my vault!?” She held up the knife. I started scratching my arm.

It changed once more. I started sobbing. In front of me was a giant stone archway with a black curtain flapping in the nonexistent wind. Everyone could hear Bellatrix’s sing-song voice screeching, “I killed Sirius Black.”

Still trembling, I got up and ran.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've made it this far, you must be truly desperate.
> 
> But thank you anyway. I hope this is providing you with some kind of enjoyment.


	10. Chapter 10

**SIRIUS**

When I stepped up to face my boggart, I already knew what to expect. My horrid father’s ever-present disdain and open disappointment, and my bitch of a mother’s shrieking and abuse. I still have the scar on my left forearm from the day I ran away to James’s house. However, what I didn’t expect was to see Regulus, my little Reggie, _branded_. I knew he played the part of the heir well, but I still feel as if I failed him. I’m supposed to protect him but I _left_ him. And now I know my fears are true.

I was still pretty shaken after that, but when I saw it was Hermione’s turn, I was intrigued. Maybe I’d get a glimpse at the mystery that surrounds her. I saw James on the floor next to another boy, but what thoroughly confused me were that his eyes weren’t the same and who was this other boy? I didn’t get to contemplate this when her boggart changed again. Fenir Greyback stood there and _leered_ at her. I felt a low growl in my throat at the things he was saying to her. It changed again and I finally understood where her nightmares came from. What shocked me was not _what_ was done to her, but _who_ had done it to her. Hermione let out a bloodcurdling scream and I’ve never wanted to kill my cousin more. But why did she look so …old? It changed again and I was more confused than ever. What’s so scary about a curtain? Then I heard the bitch say she’d killed me and she sounded damn well _proud_. But I was still alive.

I allowed myself a moment to be confused before I realized that all of this must have come from her experiences. I looked around for her only to find that she’d fled. I shared a look with my friends and they nodded. We sprinted as fast as we could back to our dormitory and quickly found the map just to watch as her footprints disappeared somewhere on the seventh floor corridor.

We ran as fast as we could, thankful for our quidditch physique, to the spot where we saw her disappear only to find a blank wall.

“You can’t- apperate- in Hogwarts.” Remus said between breaths.

“Then- we’ll wait- for her- to come back.” Lily panted leaning heavily on James.

“You guys- saw that- right?” I looked around at the small group. “Wasn’t- just me?”

“Yeah, mate- wasn’t- just you.” James looked thoroughly shaken. Probably had something to do with seeing his doppelganger lying dead in a pool of blood.

“Hey guys- I made- it.” Peter said finally catching up.

We eventually decided to hide behind one of the columns across from the wall and wait and see when she returned. A somber silence fell over us, each contemplating just _what_ we just saw.

What felt like hours later, a door appeared on the blank wall in front of us. We all stood up slowly. Waiting for something to happen. When nothing did, we walked over to it. James placed a shaky hand on the handle and turned.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

I was sobbing, I couldn’t breathe. I felt the weight of my world crashing down on top of me. No doubt the Marauders would want answers. I don’t even know if I’d be able to give them. So I ran. My lungs burned and my vision was blurry with tears. I made it to the seventh floor and paced in front of the bank wall. When I walked through the door, I cried harder.

I was at the burrow. I was home. But I was alone. There was no Molly cooking in the kitchen, no Fred and George laughing at their products, no Ginny running down the stairs, no Harry and Ron playing chess in the corner, no Arthur tampering with muggle inventions, no Bill shamelessly flirting with Fleur, no Charlie telling stories about his dragons. No one.

So I cried.

I pulled up my sleeve and noticed I’d drew blood with my scratching but thankfully the scar was healed enough it didn’t open again. Despite my dreams playing my nightmares back on a loop every night, seeing them in my waking life again was infinitely worse. I don’t know how I would handle meeting the real versions. And I hope I wouldn’t have to.

After a few hours, I heard the sound of a door handle being turned and immediately drew my wand. But it wasn’t deatheaters and it wasn’t Slytherins and it certainly wasn’t any members of the Weasley family. I let a few more tears fall and lowered my wand. It was the marauders. I sat back down on the couch and continued to stare into the fire. I felt the couch dip in the places next to me. Everyone had crowded around me, offering their confused comfort in their closeness. I felt an arm around me and didn’t have to guess to know it was Sirius. Fuck _Sirius_. He’d just heard his cousin singing that she’d kill him.

“I know you want answers, but just… just give me a minute.” I whispered. Everyone nodded.

We sat for a while in silence. I knew they were getting restless. I don’t think I’d ever be ready to tell them. Remus seemed to notice so he started off with gentle probing.

“So, what is this room? We’ve never seen it before.”

“It’s called The Room of Requirement or to some The Come and Go Room. It takes the form of whatever you require.”

“And what did you require?” Lily asked slowly.

“Comfort. Something from home. A place to think.”

“So this was your home?” Sirius questioned looking around.

“No, no- well sort of.” I laughed. “It was one of my best friend’s homes. I’d come stay during vacations sometimes. This is The Burrow.” I finished nervously.

“The Burrow? But isn’t that where the Weasleys live?” James asked.

“Yes.” At their confused looks I continued. “My best friend is Ron Weasley.”

“There’s no Ron Weasley, we would’ve known-“

“I know.” I cut James off. “There’s no Ron Weasley _yet._ ”

Everyone looked confused.

“I’m a time traveler.” More silence. I grew nervous and I started to ramble. “My birthday is September 19th, 1979. I came from the year 1998-“

“Wait, wait, wait. How did you get here?” Remus asked.

“I’m sure you remember the house elf that was with me?” At their nods I continued. “I think it was an accident. A botched rescue mission.”

“Rescue mission?” Lily asked uncertainly. The boys paled, most likely remembering the state I arrived in.

“You remember I was in the hospital wing for close to two weeks when I first got here?” Lily nodded. I took a deep breath and rolled up my sleeve. She gasped. “I was being questioned. I had something that B-Be-Bellatrix thought we’d stolen. My two best friends were taken to the cellars of Malfoy Manor and I was held back. She carved this word into my arm and she held me under the cruciatus so many times I’d lost count. She was about to give me over to G-Gr-Greyback but my friends managed to escape thanks to Dobby. Then Dobby brought me here. I’m guessing his apparition was botched because B-Bellatrix threw a knife that landed in his abdomen and killed him.”

Silence again. Everyone had pale faces. Lily’s face had tear tracks running down her cheeks. Sirius’s arm around me tightened almost painfully.

Finally James spoke. “The two boys… the redhead was Ron I’m guessing?” I nodded. I knew where this was headed. “Were they the ones held in the cellar?” I nodded and pressed on. “The other one, he looked just like me.”

“His name is Harry James Potter. He’s your son.” I watched Lily carefully, she seemed to be on the edge of a jealous breakdown.

“He has green eyes. They say they’re exactly his mother’s eyes.” James knew immediately he smiled, looked toward Lily and blushed. She still looked downtrodden but when she met James’s eyes and saw his goofy grin, she let out a few happy tears and laughed.

“He’s lovely, Lils. Exactly like you, but he gets his quidditch skills from his father.” At James’s curious look I continued. “Youngest seeker in a century. McGonagall let him on as a first year. Caught the snitch every time.” Both future parents looked incredibly proud.

“So you knew us then? In your time?” Peter asked.

I sighed heavily. “There’s a war going on. Right now and where I come from.” I began.

“So we died.” Remus concludes.

I sighed again. “Not all of you.”

“Tell us.” Sirius says gruffly.

“I can’t.”

“Then can you tell me about my death since everyone knows?” He asked coldly. He stood up and started to pace.

“Sirius-“ I began but he cut me off.

“No.” He stopped pacing. I stood up and reached a hand out. He looked me in the eyes once before turning and walking to the door. I turned and went to the window. The door slammed.

Sirius left, and I cried.

* * *

A week later found me sitting in the library writing an essay for transfiguration. Or trying to. I told myself it was pointless to be upset about this, that there were more important things. Things were tense in our group. No one wanted to ask me anymore questions for fear of the answers. I’ve tried to leave and avoid everyone, but Remus, James and Lily weren’t having it. They always drag me back to tense situations. Situations where you could cut the silence with a knife. Situations that’d end with Sirius storming out. Situations ending with pitying looks and me pretending everything was fine. It has to be. I went seven years without letting my emotions get in the way, why is it so hard now?

“He really does care about you.” I continued to write. “He just doesn’t like to let his guard down. And you came in and blew through all his walls he’d built up. And when he saw that you’d been keeping something from him… he felt attacked.” My quill stopped but I didn’t look up. “His defenses are on overload right now.” Remus finished.

“For someone who hates Slytherin ideals so much, his self-preservation is certainly up to scratch.” I whispered.

“Comparing me to snakes now are you? No better than my fucked family?” Where’d he even come from?

I sighed dejectedly. “Sirius, by now you should know I’d never hold your family against you.”

“What would you know about family? As I recall, you don’t have one.” His words cut me.

“Are you quite done?” I whispered.

“Yeah. We are.” He left. It was worse than anything Bellatrix could’ve done. I looked at Remus. He had an apologetic look on his face.

“I suppose his offense is on overload as well?”

“He just wanted you to hurt as much as he does.”

“Mission accomplished.” I wiped a tear from my eye. I cry too much I noted.

We fought like cats and dogs from then on. Any time we were in the same room it turned into a screaming match of who could hurt who worse. We both suffered. Our friends suffered. Our worst row came when Dumbledore pulled them out of class and broke the news that the dark mark was found over Potter Manor and Charlus and Dorea were dead. He screamed and raved and broke anything in his path. His grief only added on to his warpath. He screamed at me that it was my fault because I could’ve stopped it. I screamed back that he’d lost the only family that ever wanted him so he was just like me. Then we dueled. I didn’t actually want to hurt him, not that I’d have gotten the chance. I poked at the infamous Black temper. All I could do was put up protegos while his hexes, backed by his anger, tormented broke through them. He only stopped when I fell to the ground after a slicing hex got my side. I heard his wand clatter to the ground. He left me again.

* * *

The tension was still thick as blood when Valentine’s Day rolled around. We weren’t screaming and arguing at each other anymore, much to the relief of our friends, there was just tense silence.

I didn’t know how Valentine’s Day could get any worse until we walked into potions class. Slughorn was in the middle of writing the ingredients list on the board but I knew exactly what it was.

“Ho ho! Today we have a treat! As it is Valentine’s Day why not celebrate with a love potion, hm? No, no, I’ll be assigning your partners.” Meddlesome fool. “Ah, yes here we are, Mr. Lupin with Miss Meadowes. Mr. Snape with Miss Parkinson. Mr. Potter with Miss Evans.” He rambled off more names clearly putting together his own power couples. I was pulled out of my thoughts when I heard my name. “Mr. Black, you’ll be with Miss Granger.” Silence. Everyone in the class was silent. It was no secret we fought all the time these days. I caught a few Slytherins snickering at their own table.

I went over to our table and kept a safe distance between us. “Now who can tell me about Amortentia?” Slughorn asks, the smug bastard.

“It’s the most powerful love potion in the world, it smells different to each person based on what attracts them.” Lily said almost verbatim.

“Ten points to Gryffindor! Now everyone get to work.”

We didn’t speak to each other, we didn’t glance at each other. The two hours went by and I was suffocating the entire time. Bloody emotions. I tried to suppress everything so I could work. I didn’t realize until it was too late that I’d forgotten to tone down my skills. A quick glance around told me that a few people were doing just as well so I kept working.

“Oh no you don’t. You’re not botching this one up for me. Screw your cover story.” Sirius said breaking the silence for the first time in a week. I ignored him.

When we’d finished and Slughorn started coming around to check I couldn’t stay silent anymore.

“I can’t smell anything.” I started to panic. I actually wanted a good mark on this one.

“Neither can I. What did you do?” He accused.

“Me? I didn’t do anything! Maybe if you got your head out of your arse, you’d take the blame for once!” By now our rows were becoming legendary and we had gained an audience.

“You’re the one that purposefully screws everything up, don’t try to pin this on me!” Even Slughorn was watching with rapt attention.

“Everything _is_ your fault though! And- _Merlin_! Did you _have_ to smoke a fag before you came to class?” I scoffed.

“Please, as if you didn’t frolic through the fucking rose bushes on your way here.” Someone started chuckling. I looked over to find Remus barely containing his laughter. I rounded on him.

“And you! You probably helped him out, didn’t you?! Bathing him in his cologne so he wouldn’t get caught!” He laughed harder. The rest of the class joined in.

“Remus didn’t do shit! And you’re one to talk, you’re practically swimming in your fucking vanilla bullshit perfume! Probably trying to suffocate me! Go ahead and get me out of the way.” The class lost their shit.

I stopped then. The classes was laughing hysterically, Slughorn was looking at us with a proud smile. I’d realized that I ran out of my perfume weeks ago. I remembered being upset because it was another thing from home that was gone.

“Sirius, I ran out of my perfume weeks ago.” I said in a shaky voice. His head snapped to mine, then he blushed.

“I broke my last bottle of cologne last week when we… when we fought.”

“Fucking finally!” James yelled through the laughter that was dying down.

“I think that deserves full marks for both of you!” Slughorn said jovially.

I began to panic. I smelled the potion once more to make sure. When class ended I bolted, heading outside to get some air. I remembered my first time smelling Amortentia. I smelled new parchment, freshly mowed grass, and Ron’s hair. All comforting scents that made me feel safe and at home. I knew I wasn’t attracted to Ron in any way anymore. Not only could I never have him now, when he left Harry and I in that tent, it broke us. But now, I smell leather and cigarettes covered up in expensive male cologne that I know belongs to Sirius. And it makes me feel safe and it’s like coming home. It made me realize that it’s time to let go of the life I used to live in 1998, because I’ll be okay without it and I’ll see my friends again, I’ll just mean something else to them.

Once again my mind disconnected from my feet which led me to the thestrals. I walked over to one and started to pet it’s leathery neck. Its white eye bore into me.

“Sorry, I don’t have any meat for you.” I whispered.

I looked over at a tiny foal and slowly stepped over to it, avoiding sticks and leaves so not to startle it. When it noticed me, I crouched down and held out my hand, palm up. It slowly crept over and nudged it. I laughed when it closed its eyes after I started to scratch its neck.

“So you can see them too?” I turned around, startled, and drew my wand.

“I know the past few weeks have been rough, but I really don’t intend to hurt you anymore. Never again.” I lowered my wand slightly. Sirius kept his hands up but took slow steps over to me.

“And what if you do? What if I say something else you don’t like? Or if I have a secret I literally _can’t_ tell you?” My voice was like steel despite the tremors in my heart. “What if you leave me again?”

* * *

**SIRIUS**

“What if you leave me again?” Her voice cracked on the last word, betraying her. Her voice reverberated in my mind

She still held her wand out pointed at me. Her hand started shaking and she let it drop. Her steely resolve was crumbling before my eyes and I so badly wanted to build her up again, but I know I was the one to break her this time.

“I’ll never leave you.” I whispered. She looked up at me. Trying to find my lie. “I can’t stand fighting with you. We said hurtful things. I _cut_ you. I swore I would protect you and I was the one that hurt you.” My voice cracked. Only then did I realize I was crying too.

She walked over to me. Tear track marking her face, hair wild and unruly, caramel eyes behind thick eyelashes. She’d never looked more beautiful.

“I’m broken.” She said.

“I’m damaged.” I replied.

She put her arms around my neck and my hands fell to her hips.

“Quite the pair we make.” She said

“We deserve each other.”

She kissed me. And it was nothing like the time before. I was dying and she was living. I was cold and she was hot. I was nothing and she was everything. We poured our frustrations into each other and all there was was passion. There were sparks and there were fireworks. She was it. I nibbled on her bottom lip and she gasped. I greedily took the opportunity and explored her mouth with my tongue. We battled for dominance in a way that resembled our fights. I pulled her closer. And closer still, I wanted our ribcages to crack open and merge and our hearts become one.

We were breathless. I leaned my forehead against hers and we locked eyes. The molten caramel was swirling and sparkling reflecting her passion. I kissed her forehead and trapped her in a tight embrace, her head resting on my heart. I ran my fingers through her soft hair and held her. I felt her small fists tightly holding onto my jumper like I’d disappear if she let go.

I’m not going anywhere.


	11. Chapter 11

**HERMIONE**

The next morning I was called to Dumbledore’s office. I was expecting this. I knew word would get around about my boggart lesson and the Amortentia probably solidified this meeting. I walked up to the gargoyles with trepidation. What kind of bullshit will this meddling fool throw at me today? I didn’t wait for pleasantries before I sat down in the chair opposite my “godfather”.

“Miss Granger.” He began, not even looking at me yet. “I have to say, I expected you to come to me far sooner than now.”

“And why is that, professor?” I feigned ignorance. He looked at me then.

“Because I expected you should’ve needed a way to cover up your mistake.”

“Mistake, sir?” I asked incredulously.

“Yes, you of all people should’ve known not to face a boggart in front of your classmates.” I couldn’t believe it. “Now, it seems that the rumor mill had died down, until yesterday that is.”

“Ah yes, and how did you expect me to get out of that one, professor? I simply couldn’t just back out of brewing a potion-”

“No, but you didn’t have to share your findings with the class.” He sighed and turned away.

“I want you to take an unbreakable vow.” He said at last.

“No.” There was no fucking way.

“Then we’ll wait for you to change your mind.” With that he flicked his wand and all the doors and windows shut. I didn’t need to hear the clicks to know they were locked.

“You bastard.” I snarled, my eyes flashing dangerously. I knew I couldn’t take him in a battle and so did he. He simply smiled.

We stayed like that for hours. Me glaring, him smiling. Eventually, a house elf popped in and gave Dumbledore a plate of food.

“What, are you going to starve me into submission?” I scoffed.

“If that’s what it takes. Just remember you’re only hurting yourself.” He smiled and went back to his food. Eventually my stomach growled involuntarily. He chuckled.

We went like this for days. My snide comments matched with his jovial taunting. My nightmares came back fiercely. I know I looked a wreck. Dark bruising under my eyes, matted hair, and my movements became lethargic, what little weight I had put on since arriving was deteriorating again.

“Fine.” I breathed, giving in to the weakness that a rather significant hunger pain brought on.

“Wonderful!” He quickly strode over to where I was laying and knelt down in front of me. I pulled myself up into a kneeling position and grasped his hand and glared.

“Do you, Hermione Jean Granger, promise to never speak about future events to anyone who doesn’t know?”

“I, Hermione Jean Granger, promise to never speak about future events to anyone who doesn’t know.”

A faint wisp flew from the tip of his wand and wrapped itself around our hands. Quickly, while the Vow was still being placed, I spoke.

“And do you, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, promise to not meddle with my life here in 1978?” I smiled at his shocked expression.

“I, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, promise not to meddle with your life in 1978.” Another wisp wrapped around our hands and I quickly finished the deal before he could add anything else.

“You should’ve been placed in Slytherin. Leave my office.” He said turning away to start pacing, probably to think over the implications of the vow I just trapped him with. I smiled and left.

Weakly, I made my way down the stairs. When I opened the door, leaning against the doorframe, I started laughing at the sight before me. The Marauders and Lily- even Peter- were all camped out in the hallway, blankets and pillows and all. My laughing must have roused them because Sirius immediately engulfed me in a hug. I flinched _hard_. He backed away. I started hyperventilating. My vision started going black. I barely registered I was on the floor. Someone had taken my hand. I heard a voice asking me to squeeze their hand if I could hear them. I squeezed lightly. And then I smelled the familiar leather, cigarettes and cologne. I buried my face in something soft and let the feeling of safety wash over me and let a soft thumping noise lull me into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

When Hermione said she had a meeting with the Headmaster I didn’t think much of it, I trusted the man. When she didn’t come to class later I worried that there was something wrong. When she didn’t come back to the common room, I looked at the map and sighed in relief when I found both of them still in his office. When she didn’t come back the next day, but was still sitting in his office, I began to worry again. I tried to ask McGonagall what was going on but she wouldn’t give me an answer. The rest of us were growing worried as well, so we went to the gargoyles and spit out every piece of candy we could think of, Lily even tried all kinds of muggle candy. The gargoyles wouldn’t budge. So then we decided to camp out and wait. Minnie gave us detentions for blocking the hallway and missing class, but she stopped when she say how worried we were about our friend. I could tell she was getting worried as well.

Finally, after six days, we heard her laughter. I didn’t take the time to look her over before I hugged her. I felt her flinch and stepped back. What had happened in there? She started breathing fast and trembling. She looked like she did when she first got here. Surely Dumbledore wouldn’t do this to her, right? I lowered her gently to the ground and sked her if she could hear me. When she squeezed my hand I gently put my arm around her shoulders and the other under her knees. She buried her face in my chest like she does anytime she’s distraught. I ran quickly with her in my arms to the hospital wing, I didn’t have to look behind me to know my friends were close behind. We burst through the doors and immediately Poppy was on us.

“Why is it always you four in he- Oh! Poor dear! Get her over to a bed! What happened?”

“We don’t know, she was up in Dumbledore’s office for six days and she came down the stairs and just collapsed.” I said putting Hermione on a bed. She whimpered when I tried to pull away and she fisted my shirt and held on tightly.

“Just sit with her, dear. The rest of you out so I can run tests.” I sat behind her and watched as Pomfrey flitted about, running test after test.

Then she got really angry. “She’s showing signs of starvation and sleep deprivation. Her body couldn’t take it anymore so she collapsed. She’s probably having a relapse with her nightmares.” She explained through gritted teeth. “You’re not going anywhere Mr. Black, I fear right now you’re the only thing keeping her from going into a coma.” I was shocked. And angry. Why would Dumbledore do this to Hermione? Most of all I was feeling guilty because I couldn’t protect her.

Madame Pomfrey sent her patronus to Dumbledore asking him to come to the infirmary immediately and then she started pouring the necessary potions down Hermione’s throat.

When Dumbledore got there, all hell broke loose. Poppy started in on him, releasing a dam of anger about endangering a student, a child nonetheless. Dumbledore just stood there with a small smile on his face. I wanted to punch the bastard. He ended her rant when he held up a hand and spoke at last.

“It was a necessary evil for the greater good.” She stared at him for a long time.

“Was it really necessary? Making her a pawn in your chess game?” With that she turned away and went back toward her office.

I glared at the Headmaster the entire time before he finally closed the doors after his departure. I sighed and looked at the beautiful witch in my arms. Her tiny nose buried deep into my shirt, the cloth bunched in her small fists.

“You’re so strong, my love.” I murmur sadly. I shift us lower in the bed and move my arms to protectively surround her. And with that I fell asleep.

* * *

In the weeks following, Hermione slowly got better. It was like she was at square one again. She wouldn’t tell anyone what happened between her and Dumbledore and she had to physically restrain me from hexing the old coot. I felt helpless. She told me there was nothing I could’ve done and it wasn’t worth getting expelled over. I didn’t believe her. Whenever she had a nightmare and woke up screaming in the middle of the night, she’d always sneak over to the boys’ dorms and crawl under the covers with me. This appeased the helpless feeling. It felt good to be needed. To provide comfort for someone.

When a Hogsmeade weekend rolled around sometime in March, and Hermione drug me into a broom cupboard and started wringing her hands, I smiled. She was trying to ask me to go with her. She babbled on in a cute manner, I studied her small bashful smile and the light pink on her cheeks. I cut off her ramblings with a kiss and told her I’d love to go to Hogsmeade with my girlfriend. Her smile grew wider at the title and she forcefully pressed her lips against mine. Snogged me within an inch of my life she did.

Everything was fine for once. We spent the day looking at all the shops, I bought her things when she wasn’t looking and slipped them into her bag, and I convinced her to go through Zonko’s. We met the rest of our friends at the Three Broomsticks and were laughing over a butterbeer when the screaming started.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

I woke up that morning feeling as if something wasn’t right. I brushed it off as nerves over my first date with Sirius. When we walked into the Three Broomsticks, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I chalked that up to a chill in the wind. When I heard screams I felt foolish, I briefly thought of how Mad Eye would have berated me for not keeping constant vigilance. I looked out the window and saw deatheaters walking through the village and blowing up shops, someone had already cast the dark mark above Hogsmeade. Immediately I fell into action. Despite it being a few months since I was last in a fight, my muscles and instincts didn’t forget.

“Lily!” She was just standing there in shock. “Get the younger years to the castle, there’s a secret passage in the storage room in Honeydukes.” She nodded. “James, go with her.” He nodded and they both ran.

Remus and Sirius stayed with me protecting the students from the curses the death eaters were shooting.

“Where’s Pete!” Sirius yelled. I had a good idea where Peter was, but I wasn’t about to bring it up now.

“I don’t know! He might have made it back to the castle!” Remus yelled over an exploding building.

“Stay focused!” I yelled. We’d formed a triangle of sorts. Death eaters were closing ranks. Then I realized, they aren’t trying to kill us. This is a trap.

I quickly realized that if we stayed together, we’d play into their game. So I ran forward and pushed into one of the deatheaters knocking him into his partner.

“ _Incarcerous!_ ” I tied both men together and ran.

“HERMIONE!” I turned and looked. Half the death eaters gave up the fight with Sirius and Remus and were now coming after me. I sent tripping jinxes over my shoulder in an attempt to slow them down. I ran into an alleyway and quickly disillusioned myself and silenced my feet. I watched as the remaining deatheaters that followed stopped in the middle and became confused. I sent a nonverbal Bombarda to the building next to them raining stone and debris down on them.

I ran back to the main street where I came from but couldn’t see Sirius or Remus anywhere. I saw Lily leading some scared third and fourth years across the street to Honeydukes that’s when I also noticed a deatheater making the movements for that dark curse that Dolohov got me with fifth year. I quickly sent a nonverbal Langlock to try to reduce the effect of the curse.

“ _Protego Totalus!_ ” I sent towards Lily trying to protect her and the younger teenagers. The curse hit my shield and cut through it but it held out enough. I allowed a moment of triumph that it worked until I saw someone send a jet of green light toward her.

“LILY!” I screamed. She was hit and flung back into the wall behind her. I ran over to her and got there the same time James did. I quickly looked her over. She had cuts everywhere but she was breathing.

“She’s okay, she’s okay, just in a bad way, she’ll be fine. Take her out of here.” James scooped her up into her arms and ran as fast as he could with a bleeding leg.

Then I heard her. Her maniacal laughter. Her screeching voice that haunts my dreams.

“Well, if it isn’t my bloodtraitor cousin. Tell me, where’s your little mudblood girlfriend?”

“Fuck of Bella.” Sirius. No he can’t be dueling her. I ran.

“Really now, that’s no way to treat family, is it cousin? Crucio!” I heard his screams. I saw him writhing on the ground.

“Come on Bella, you can do better than that!” My breath caught at the familiar words. A flash of an older Sirius falling through a black curtain. I put myself between Sirius and Bellatrix and fired curse after curse at her. No one touches what’s _mine_.

“ _Lacarnum Inflamerae!_ ” She dodged it easily.

“The girl’s got a fire in her! I’ll be sure to put it out!” She screeched sending more curses and jinxes toward me. The thing about her fighting style is that she tends to throw in joking hexes, she likes to play.

“ _Avis, Oppugno!_ ” My birds exploded in her shield leaving a cloud of feathers obscuring her vision just long enough for me to get off my next curse.

“ _Carpe Retractum!_ ” The rope wrapped around her ankle and brought her to the ground.

“How does it feel- _Incarcerous-_ knowing you’ve been brought to the ground- _Diffindo_ \- below me, a _fucking mudblood_.” For once the bitch was speechless. I noticed Remus off to the side limping trying to help Sirius, both watching. I saw that all the death eaters had stopped.

“ _Serpensortia!_ Because you like snakes so much, _Bella_.” I spat.

I heard a hissing sound that made my blood run cold. _He_ was here. He must have told the snake to back off. I turned around and there he was, clapping with a smile on his vile face. The first thing I noticed, was that he actually had hair. I started to laugh. This of course confused everyone. He ignored me.

“When the retrieval was taking a long time, I figured I’d come down here myself and see what the holdup was.” I noticed a few deatheaters bow their heads, whether out of shame or fear I didn’t know. “Ah, but now I see. For a mudblood you are quite the duelist. Tell me, did we cross paths where you come from?” Now I get it. Wormtail must have relayed to him that I am a time traveler and that this Hogsmeade weekend was a perfect opportunity to kidnap me.

“Hm, not you personally, _mice_ to meet you, however, it seems someone’s _ratted_ you out to Dumbledore, so you might want to run home with your _tail_ between your legs.” I was still running on adrenaline and Gryffindor bravery and I hoped that my little bluff will come true in the next few moments or my cheek will surely get me killed, time traveler or not.

He did, however, look affronted by my sly puns. “That old man? Let him try to stop me.” He said with a disdainful sneer. I remembered Harry telling me once that his hatred stems from Dumbledore’s suspicions.

“I did try, Tom. But it seems, you didn’t want to be stopped.” For a brief moment I saw fear flicker in Voldemort’s red eyes before he schooled his features once more. I ran over to the side where Sirius and Remus were. No one dared move.

“No, you insipid old fool. I _can’t_ be stopped.” He raised his wand.

“Everything can be stopped, Tom.” Dumbledore finally pulled out his own wand.

“ENOUGH!” And he cast.

The last time I saw a duel of this magnitude, was between the same two people in the Department of Mysteries. The duel lasted for what seemed like ages, you could feel the magic crackling in the air. Each casting powerful spells. Finally aurors showed up and deatheaters started disapperating before they could be caught, Voldemort being the first to go. Aurors rounded up as many as they could. Remus, Sirius and I started limping back to the castle.

Madame Pomfrey was a sight to behold. Constantly rushing from bed to bed administering as much help as she can. A few healers from St. Mungo’s flooed in to help and take some of the patients that were worse off. All in all I consider it a victory because no one died. But the looks on my friends’ faces tell me they’ve never seen anything like this.

“You’re not even phased.” Remus observed, face pale.

“I’ve had my fair share of battles, Remus.” I whispered.

“You were brilliant. Fucking reckless. But brilliant.” Sirius admired, still trembling from the effects of the Cruciatus.

“You all were” I said with a small smile.

“So this- this is only the beginning?” James asked. He hadn’t left Lily’s side since he got her here. She still hadn’t woke up yet.

I simply nodded.

Looking around at my friends, these friends that have become my family in 1978, I realized that I don’t want to lose them. When I saw Bellatrix curse Sirius something _snapped_ and I could’ve killed her. I’m not letting these people go. Harry will have his parents, Sirius will never go to Azkaban, and Remus will never be alone. Wormtail will be outted. I will protect what’s mine. And I will destroy every horcrux and the bastard that made them. With that thought, I rolled over on my bed and fell asleep.

* * *

I was woken up by the sound of yelling. I pulled out my wand and went to see what was going on. James, Remus, and Sirius had their wands drawn on Snape who had his wand trained on James.

“What makes you think we’ll let a _deatheater_ anywhere near, Lily?” Sirius snarled. Remus was actually growling.

“Don’t forget it was _your_ kind that did this to her.” James hissed. Snape was angrier than I’d ever seen him.

“I didn’t do anything.” He got out between gritted teeth.

“And that’s been your problem since first year. You. Never. Did. Anything.”

“James, please.” I said quietly trying to keep this from going too far.

“You might as well have been the one who cursed her.” James said.

“ _Sectumsempra!_ ”

“NO!” I rushed over to James’s body, blood was leaking from everywhere. His body was riddled with cuts. Sirius and Remus were staring in shock at their best friend that was lying on the floor in a pool of his blood. Snape’s anger had completely vanished replaced by guilt, even if it was James Potter.

“ _Vulnera Sanetur! Vulnera Sanetur!_ ” His blood slowly traveled back into his body. I levitated him over to a bed and ran and got bandages and some potions. I removed his shirt and winced at the angry slice across his chest. I wrapped the bandage around him and coaxed the potions down his throat.

“Stay with him, let me know if he wakes up or if the bleeding starts again.” I said to Remus and Sirius. They nodded and walked over to his bed.

I walked over to where Snape was and led him out into the hall. I put up silencing charms.

“How did you know how to heal that?” He accused.

“Really now? That’s the first thing you say. Not ‘sorry I almost killed your friend’ or ‘thank you for not reporting me for using a dark curse’?”

“How do you know it’s a dark curse I cr-“ He cut himself off.

“I know you did. You’re the one who taught me the countercurse.” His eyes widened comically.

“So it’s true then.” He whispered.

“Yes, now let’s talk about how you’re going to get back into Lily’s good graces.”

“Oh fuck, she’s never going to forgive me for this.”

“Probably not, but I know how you can get her to at least be in the same room as you.”

He looked skeptical. “What did you have in mind?”

“You’re an Occlumens correct?”

“I’ve been lear-“

“Great. Now, I want you to spy for me.” He frowned and sneered, eyes flashing dangerously.

“I’ll get killed.”

“You’ll probably get killed either way. Want to die with Lily thinking you’re a dark arts fanatic or with her thinking you’re brave because you’re ricking your life getting us information?”

“Fucking Gryffindors. I see your point.”

“Wonderful.” I smiled.

“You should’ve been placed in Slytherin.” He grumbled.

“So I’ve been told.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found one of my author's notes for this chapter where I tried to explain my reasoning for blatant dialog exposition.
> 
> No one likes dialog exposition.
> 
> Not even me. Feel free to skip, guys.

**HERMIONE**

Lily finally woke up the next day. Sirius wasted no time telling her who put James in the bed next to her. Lily was angrier than when Snape had called her a mudblood. Looking around at my second family I took note of their stricken expressions. It was clear they hadn’t faced anything to this degree yet. Despite suffering their personal losses, they’d lived in blissful ignorance behind the castle walls. Being Harry –The Chosen One- Potter’s best friend made me spoiled with my own brushes with death. I knew they’d want to fight just like I did. They’d join the Order in a heartbeat.

Since I’ve come to the decision that they would not be dying this time around, I’ve figured it’s best to let them know what exactly we are up against. I was going to tell them everything. And it was going to destroy their innocent ignorance.

With that in mind, after everyone had been healed, I led them up to the Room of Requirement. There we found a small replica of the Gryffindor common room- loveseats, armchairs, and a raging fireplace all emblazoned in red and gold. I asked a house elf to bring us tea and motioned for them to sit.

“So, why couldn’t Peter come? If it’s important, shouldn’t he be here?” James asked innocently.

The elf came back, I told him to bring back firewhiskey.

“I’ll get to that.” I said and took a sip of tea. “I’ve decided that I don’t want to sit back and watch history play out. Since I can’t go back, this is my home too and I’m not going to stop fighting.” I chanced a look around me, they were waiting for more. Sirius gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.

“I should probably start at the beginning, or more specifically, my beginning.” I cleared my throat and began.

“By now you could probably guess I’m a bit of a bookworm.” They chuckled. “When I was eleven, I got my Hogwarts letter, but being muggleborn, I didn’t know anything about the magical world. Not wanting to be at a disadvantage, I read every book I could before boarding the Hogwarts Express the first time.”

I sipped my tea and took a big breath.

“I’d read about a savior. The person who defeated Lord Voldemort, the only person to ever survive the Killing Curse.” Lily gasped. “He’d done the impossible, I know, but he had only been a year old. They called him The-Boy-Who-Lived.” I looked closely at the mix of calculating and disbelieving looks trying to figure out how a one year old could do it.

“Imagine my surprise when I met the boy on the train to Hogwarts also for his first year. Imagine my surprise when he didn’t even know why he was so famous in the wizarding world.” They looked befuddled.

“He was raised by his muggle relatives who lied to him for half his life about who he was. His parents had died that night along with Voldemort.”

“How do you know about his relatives? That couldn’t have been in books.” Remus reasoned.

“You’re right. He told me because he was my best friend.” Everyone paled.

“Not, n-not Lily and...” Sirius couldn’t even finish. I nodded sadly.

“When you mean muggle relatives, you don’t mean…?” Lily trailed off.

“Yes and not a day goes by that I don’t want to hex your horse of a sister.” I said heatedly. “But don’t worry, it won’t come to this. Harry will grow up with his parents.” I said more to myself than anyone else.

“Why was Voldemort after us? We couldn’t have been anything special to him.” James asked after a moment of silence.

“You were. There was a prophecy made about a boy who would go on to defeat him. There were two babies who fit the qualifications, you two and Alice and Frank’s child.” I paused. “Inevitably, by going after Harry, he had chosen his equal.”

“What happened to Alice and Frank?” Lily asked quietly. I sighed.

“Once word got out that Voldemort had perished, his most loyal followers wanted retribution.”

“They killed them?” Lily gasped. I shook my head.

“Worse. Bellatrix, Rodolphus, and Rabastan Lestrange held them under the Cruciatus. They tortured them to insanity. Neville grew up with his grandmother. We’ll save them from their fate too.”

“How?” Sirius rasped.

“I’m getting there. Just-“ I poured myself a glass of firewhiskey and tossed it back . “I’m sorry. James and Lily were placed under the Fidelus Charm for just over a year after Harry had been born. Sirius was, naturally the secret keeper.” Sirius looked proud. “At the last second, about a week before Voldemort’s downfall, you switched. You said that anyone could guess that you knew and you were afraid of giving up your best friend.” A few tears started to leak down my face. I closed my eyes. “There was a spy in the Order. Everyone blamed everyone. You chose Peter to keep your secret. No one would’ve suspected him.” I took another deep breath. “Peter was- _is_ \- a deatheater. He betrayed you. Handed you over.”

Remus swore. Sirius growled. James was in disbelief. Lily had tears running down her face.

“Sirius tried to go after him, to kill him, once he’d realized, he chased Peter to a muggle street. Peter framed Sirius for the murder of twelve of those muggles and himself as well as the deaths of Lily and James. Peter cut off his own finger, set off an explosion, turned into his rat animagus and hid for twelve years while Sirius went to Azkaban with no trial.” There were even more tears streaming down my face. Sirius looked livid, like he could kill Peter right now.

“H-he can’t be a d-deatheater.” James was still in disbelief.

“Prongs, it makes sense. He disappears all the time. He even wears long sleeves all the time come to think of it.” Remus was getting angrier with every word. “Why didn’t I realize? In the future?”

“Dumbledore had sent you on missions for months at a time to convene with other werewolves. You weren’t around enough to notice, and there was so much death and confusion, not to mention Harry being born.”

Everyone was quiet. They were grieving the loss of their friend. I told them this was the reason he wasn’t with us to hear my story. They reasoned that Peter had told Voldemort about me and that was why there was an attack on Hogsmeade. We sipped our tea for what felt like hours.

“You were at war where you came from. I feel that wasn’t the end of the story.” Remus broke the silence with what was more like a statement than a question. I nodded taking that as my cue to continue.

“You all know I’m skilled with a wand, more than what books teach.” They nodded. “We have been fighting since we were eleven. We’ve been up against trolls, three-headed dogs, giant chess boards, cursed bludgers, giant acromantulas, a basilisk, dementors, mass murderers, werewolves, a dragon, merpeople, cursed objects, deatheaters, traitors, horrid teachers, centaurs, reporters, the bloody Ministry; I’ve been petrified, held at the bottom of the lake, I broke into the ministry-twice, rode on the back of a thestral- twice, I’ve been tortured, cursed, splinched, believe it or not, I’ve actually time traveled before this, and finally before I came here, I’d been on the run living out of a tent for the past year. And Harry and Ron were with me the whole way.”

Everyone looked thoroughly shocked. Mouths hung open.

“Fucking hell, love.” Sirius said thoroughly astonished.

“Why would you have to go through all of this if Voldemort was defeated?” Remus questioned.

“The night Lily and James died, Voldemort didn’t actually die, only his body did. He made horcruxes.”

Sirius paled. Everyone else looked confused.

“What’s a horcrux?” Lily asked innocently.

“It’s extremely dark magic that splits your soul. You have to murder someone to do it.” Sirius said. Lily gasped.

“So do you know where it is?” James asked me.

“I have an idea where they are-“

“Did you say they? As in more than one?” Remus asked with wide eyes. I nodded. James and Sirius swore.

“The bastard made more than one? It’s bad enough to do it once.” Sirius raved.

“I believe at this moment he has five, in my time he had seven.” I explained.

“The most powerful magical number.” Lily whispered.

“So what’s our plan? Clearly you’ve thought this through.” Remus asked.

“Yes. I have a rough outline of major events coming up and we can save as many as we can along the way. But we have to do it secretly, Dumbledore can’t know I’m changing things. He’s already put me under an unbreakable vow.” They nodded understandingly.

“So what’s the first thing that happens?” Sirius asks.

“Dumbledore’s going to ask you to join the Order of the Phoenix at the end of this year. It’s imperative you do, he already knows you want to fight, if you decline he’ll know something’s amiss.”

They nodded.

“And when do we get the horo-thingies?” James asked impatiently.

“Horcruxes. There are windows of opportunity to obtain each one. The tricky part is destroying them. In my time Harry had killed a basilisk with the sword of Gryffindor so the venom was embedded in the sword so we were able to destroy the horcruxes. But since it hasn’t been killed _yet_ , I’m going to have to learn how to control _fiendfyre_.” I said.

“No. No way-“

“It’s either that or we go kill a basalisk.” I cut Sirius off. Everyone was silent.

“Love, do you have _any_ stories that are happy and _not_ life threatening?” Sirius asked finally.

I laughed. “I punched Lucius’s son, Draco Malfoy, in the face my third year. Then, I went back in time and watched myself do it again.” Sirius barked out a laugh.

“Come on, there’s got to be more!” James said between laughs.

“I kept an illegal animagus beetle, who was a reporter, in a jar for a year after she wrote horribly things about us. I set Snape’s robes on fire my first year, he was our potions professor for years. I-”

“No way Snivelly was a _professor_.” James said through laughs.

“Remus was. Best Defense professor we ever had.” Everyone laughed harder. Remus went red in the face.

“Now hush. Let’s see… Oh! My second year, I brewed polyjuice potion for Harry, Ron, and myself, but I accidentally put cat hair in mine. I was in the hospital wing for weeks.”

“You turned yourself into a cat?” Sirius laughed.

“You brewed pollyjuice? When you were _twelve_?” Lily looked put out.

“A cat?! Did you guys not hear?” Looked around at his mates then back at me. “I think that deserves a nickname, Kitten.”

“That’s exactly what you called me in the future.” I said with a watery smile.

“You know what they say, great minds and all that.” Sirius said pulling me into his lap.

“That’s our cue to leave.” Remus said, awkwardly getting up.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

We didn’t hear the rest of our friends leave as we were too thoroughly wrapped up in each other’s company. What was this witch doing to me? She makes me crazy I swear. Somehow, her legs had ended up on either side of my lap. I held onto her hips and slipped my thumbs under her shirt and rubbed slow circles against the heated skin over her hipbones. I broke from our kissed and looked into her eyes and found her caramel orbs swirling with passion. She gave me a dopey grin that I couldn’t help but kiss away. Her arms snaked around my neck and played with the hair at the nape of my neck, sending splendid shivers down my spine.

I pulled her hips down and she gasped. I broke the kiss and went to her neck, licking, suckling, nibbling, up and down. I stopped at her pulse point at sucked, drawing an intoxicating sigh from her. She started to grind on my ever-present arousal and we both gave a breathy moan. She giggled nervously. Then it occurred to me that I could very well be the only guy who’s ever been in this position with her. This made me pause.

“Is everything alright?” She asked smile fading.

“Everything is wonderful, Kitten.” She smiled at the name. “I just want to do this right. You mean a lot more to me than a quick shag.”

“You mean a lot to me too, Sirius.” I kissed her. I broke it before it could become too heated.

“I want to go slow with you, and savor every moment we have.” She smiled. “And if we don’t stop now, I’m afraid I might lose all control over those morals.” She chuckled and moved off my lap. She rested her head on my chest and I protectively wrapped my arms around her. We sat there just enjoying each other’s company for a long time.

She was about to fall asleep when I asked her a question that’s been plaguing my mind since she told me her story.

“What happened to Regulus?” I whispered.

“Hmm?” She asked sleepily.

“After I went to Azkaban and Voldemort had been temporarily defeated… What happened to Reggie?”

She turned to face me. “January 1979, Regulus was said to be killed by Voldemort himself.” My heart broke. “It wasn’t Voldemort, Sirius, Regulus had defected and he tried to fight Voldemort from the inside. He found a horcrux, but in retrieving it, Voldemort’s defenses killed him.”

I was placated by the fact he’d changed sides in the end but his death still hurt. She touched my face and wiped away a tear I didn’t know had fallen.

“He’ll live. We’ll go with him to get the horcrux. He’ll fight with us and we’ll protect him.” I nodded and gave her a small smile.

“My beautiful witch.” I murmured into her hair as I held her closer.

“My handsome Snuffles.”

“What the hell’s a Snuffles?” I asked her but she had already fallen asleep. I conjured up a blanket and draped it over us. I held her close and quickly followed her into a blissful sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

**SIRIUS**

“Are you sure you want me with there with you?”

“Yes, of course. It’s good to have another perspective on this.” Hermione assured me.

“So Remus and I will be here with the distraction,” James said as he pointed to two bits of toast on his plate. “Lily will be along shortly and cause an argument creating an even bigger distraction.”

“Why do I have to be the dab of marmalade? Why can’t I be the strawberry?” Lily looked crestfallen.

“You’re really sweet, and you go well with me. Strawberries and toast doesn’t work, _marmalade_ and toast however-“

“Save your sappy breakfast food flirting for another time. Now, will you be able to get us enough time to get into Dumbledore’s office?” Hermione cut James off impatiently.

“”Mione, I think you underestimate our talents, you and Pads will have _plenty_ of time.”

She sighed. “Alright, when do we do this?”

“Tonight at dinner. I should be done with the potion by then.” Remus said. “And the house elves adore me so I’ll have no trouble spiking everyone’s drinks”

Hermione still looked apprehensive so I snaked my arm around her and pulled her into my side.

“By the time we make it back, you won’t be the only kitten, Kitten,” She smiled.

“As long as I’m still the only one you call Kitten, I could care less.” I barked out a laugh.

* * *

Later that night we were hiding in an alcove across from the headmaster’s office. I had to admit that it was much more comfortable being cramped under the cloak with a girlfriend than with three other boys. Accidental hand placement definitely wasn’t as awkward and much more enjoyable. I still didn’t understand why she chose me to be with her for this. Remus would have been a better choice, he pays way more attention to detail than I could. Although, the thought of Remus under the cloak with Hermione didn’t sit well.

I was about to ask her how close it was to dinner time when the door opened, halting any words from escaping my mouth. We watched silently as Dumbledore walked out, whistling a jovial tune as he glided down the hallway toward the Great Hall. Hermione let out a breath she’d been holding. I chuckled into her shoulder and relished the shiver that my breath caused. We heard telltale meowing and took that as the sign to go ahead with the plan. I chuckled at what I imagined the Great Hall looked like at that moment.

“Fizzing Whizzbees. Fudge Flies. Cockroach Cluster. Acid Pops. Ice Mice. Treacle Fudge. Pixie Puffs. Sugar Quills.” Exasperated, she turned to me and asked, “Why didn’t we ask Lily or James what the password was?”

“You mean, why didn’t you?” I looked at the gargoyles. “Snickers.”

She scoffed. “Muggle candy.”

We stepped up on the staircase. “I think they’re pretty tasty.”

“I don’t care for peanuts.” She made a face.

“What? How? That’s like saying you don’t like treacle tart.”

She smiled innocently at me.

“ _Really_? That’s it, you can’t be my girlfriend.” She punched me in the arm and I laughed. We sobered up quickly when we were faced with the closet that held Dumbledore’s pensive. She took a deep breath and opened it.

Whatever I was expecting a pensive to look like was not this. I knew what pensives were for, but my parents always thought I was too reckless to even be close to theirs. Then I was disowned so I didn’t matter. So I never knew what they looked like, so when I saw the giant bowl that looked like a fancy sink without a spout, I was intrigued. I watched as Hermione took a deep breath, closed her eyes and touched the tip of her wand to her temple. I was amazed at the tangible memory that came out attached to her wand. She dropped it in the pensive and the memory swirled around. She grabbed my hand.

“Ready?”

I nodded. She leaned over and put her head in the liquid and I followed suit.

I felt Hermione’s hand clamp down on mine harder. I opened my eyes and scanned the unfamiliar room. Everything was black, dark, and depressing. You could practically feel the dark magic that covered the place. The lavish furnishings and décor, no matter how depressing, looked expensive. No doubt this belonged to purebloods. I saw a haggard looking Lucius and an older looking Narcissa standing with a younger boy that had to be the kid Hermione said she punched.

There was commotion behind me so I turned to look and my heart dropped to my stomach. Hermione never said what memory of hers we’d be looking at. She just said there were some details she wished to revisit thinking they could lead her to another horcrux. I now understood why she took me instead of Remus. She trusts me implicitly, she wouldn’t show this memory to just anyone.

I felt honored, but also apprehensive to what I was about to witness.

I saw three young people, no older than I was, bound at the wrists and being manhandled by disgusting people that looked like they belonged in Knockturn Alley. I involuntarily growled at the one holding Hermione by her hair. She was dressed in the same outfit she was wearing when she arrived in my time and I had forgotten how sickly she looked. Thinking of how she looked when she arrived was not helping in this situation considering I was about to watch how she came to be in that state. I looked at the other two boys that were with her. Redhead was definitely a Weasley and the boy with black hair had a striking resemblance to James. Both of them looked about the same, if slightly better, as Hermione’s malnourished state. I didn’t get a chance to contemplate why Harry’s face was swollen before I heard my cousin’s screeching voice.

“What is this?” Hermione’s hand clamped tighter if it were possible.

“We’ve got Harry Potter!” Fenir Greyback. I recognized him from Hermione’s boggart. Half-man half-beast, utterly repulsive. He was wanting a reward. A reward for handing over children. Remus always said he had a sick thing for children.

Just then the Malfoy boy was drug closer. Despite the animosity, I had a small thread of respect for the boy for lying despite knowing exactly who these people were. _Merlin_ , Lucius looked so bloody eager. Narcissa looked withdrawn, encouraging her son.

There was an argument over who get the credit and who would be calling Voldemort. It was sickening.

“STOP!” shrieked Bellatrix, “Do not touch it, we shall all perish if the Dark Lord comes now!”

I took note of her panicked state. Her normal insane expression was now wide-eyed and frantic. I watched her the men who were holding a sword. I figured this must have been the sword Hermione said had the basilisk venom in it.

“Where did you find this sword?” she whispered frantically to Greyback, brandishing it in his face, “Snape sent it to my vault in Gringotts!”

“It was in their tent.” He rasped.

“Take these prisoners down to the cellar, Greyback.”

“Wait,” said Bellatrix sharply. “All except. . . . except for the Mudblood.” I growled involuntarily even though this was a memory and they couldn’t hear me. Greyback gave a grunt of pleasure. The sick bastard. I didn’t want to think about what came next.

“No!” shouted the redhead. “You can have me, keep me!” I had to respect this boy. He was willing to take the place of his lifelong friend knowing he might not come out of it. I felt guilty for a moment when I almost wished it was him instead.

I watched my deranged cousin drag Hermione over to the middle of the floor and push her down. My Hermione seemed to have stopped breathing. I pulled her to me and put my arms around her. There was no warning when Bellatrix sent the first Crucio. I held Hermione tighter. Her screams cut through me.

“Where did you get that sword?!”

“We found it.”

My heart was beating erratically. But I couldn’t let myself be drug into situation. I had to try to catch details.

Her screams chilled me to the bone.

“You’re lying, filthy Mudblood, and I know it! You have been inside my vault at Gringotts! Tell the truth, tell the truth!”

Another scream, I was practically snarling. I wanted to rip my cousin’s throat out.

“What else did you take? What else have you got? Tel me the truth or, I swear, I shall run you through with this knife!”

I saw the glint of the dagger. I knew what came next. I turned my Hermione’s face into my chest and held her. She was rubbing the scar that had come from the screams I am listening to. I grabbed both her hands in mine and forced her to look into my eyes. I saw her terror written on her face as if she were the one screaming. I leaned my forehead against hers and whispered reassurances trying to keep her on me instead of what was happening just outside our bubble.

“What else did you take, what else? ANSWER ME! CRUCIO!”

I’d had enough, I don’t know how but I somehow managed to pull both of us out of the memory. I never lost a point of contact with Hermione as she collected her memory from the pensive and closed the cabinet. I never lost contact when we walked back to Gryffindor Tower. I especially didn’t lose contact when I sat on the couch and pulled her down to sit between my legs. My back against the armrest and her back against my chest, I held her. She never cried. She continued to hold my arms, which were around her waist, in a death grip.

Eventually, her rigid posture relaxed against me and she turned her head to where it rested on my heart. Her grip slacked and she closed her eyes. I thought she had fallen asleep when she finally spoke.

“She kept going on about her vault.” She whispered.

“Yeah, she seemed right panicked when she saw the sword.”

“She thought it was in her vault, so she thought we had been in her vault.”

“And she wanted to know if you took anything else.” I said quietly.

“She was in Voldemort’s inner circle in my time, I don’t doubt Voldemort trusted a horcrux to her.”

“Especially considering how she thought Voldemort would kill them all if he was summoned.” I supplied.

“Her vault would have been perfect. You can’t rob Gringotts.”

“And the LeStrange vault is in the furthest depths of the caves. It’s also guarded by a dragon.”

She looked thoughtful, biting away at her lower lip trying to work through some problem.

“I’m not sure how trusted she is yet, I don’t know if he would have given it to her yet.”

Just then the portrait crashed open and Remus, James, and Lily burst through laughing. I was astounded at how comfortable Lily was with James considering they had just pranked together. She looked like she belonged.

“Oh, good. Must’ve worked then.” James said flopping down into an armchair.

“You should have seen it, Padfoot.” Remus said sitting on the couch at their feet. “So many kittens-“ He couldn’t finish because he was laughing to hard.

“And then Lily comes in to try and argue with me,” James took over. “But she couldn’t keep a straight face.” He too fell into bits of laugher.

“I was doing rather well, until Dumbledore walked past as a kitten.” There were tears coming out of her eyes. “He still had his beard.” By this point we were all laughing.

“It’s a shame you couldn’t be there.” James said after we’d settled down.

“Yeah, you even gave us the inspiration, ‘Mione, and you missed the fun of it.” Remus said.

“But it was for a good cause.” Lily said turning her attention to Hermione. “So did you find any good information? You said it was about a location for one of those soul bits right?”

“Yeah, I did.” Everyone waited with a baited breath. “We’re going to have to break into Gringotts.”

* * *

**HERMIONE**

The end of the school term couldn’t have come fast enough. After taking note of where each horcrux was likely to be, I began to draw up plans to acquire them. Graduation would mean that we would be able to follow through with these plans without Dumbledore breathing down our backs. Naturally, everyone was shocked when I said we’d have to break in to Gringotts, but after my explanation, they realized it was likely the only way, as it was pointed out, Sirius was still disowned and didn’t have access to the family vaults.

I met with Snape to confirm how trusting Voldemort is with both Bellatrix and Lucius. He told me Bellatrix is more like his loyal lapdog than a servant, so there’s no doubt she has a piece of his soul hidden away. He also said that Lucius and Narcissa are to be married later this year and Lucius had boasted about Voldemort hinting at an important present to be in his possession. The Gaunt ring I know to be in a small shack in Little Hangleton, and I know Regulus will be going to a cave to retrieve the locket in less than a year’s time. The fifth horocrux is still a mystery to me. I’ll need to research Ravenclaw and Gryffindor heirlooms more.

NEWT exams were under way and for once I wasn’t a nervous wreck. I supposed field experience coupled with lower educational standards really took away the challenge that NEWTs were supposed to be. Unfortunately, that didn’t carry over to the other seventh years. Lily and Remus were a wreck up until the exams. James and Sirius pretended everything was fine then broke down in a panic right before each exam.

One afternoon, late in the week, we were waiting outside a classroom. All other exams were already tested and we were waiting for the practical for our final exam, Defense. One by one I watched each of my friends walk in to the room and come out looking wrecked but overall relieved. The proctors cast a charm that prevented anyone from spilling information about the practical, so I had no idea what to expect when I walked into the classroom.

When I saw what looked to be a forest area I was instantly confused and looked around for the proctor. Then I heard a howl. Recognizing the significance of such a sound I looked into the artificial night sky to find a full moon. I heard a howl again, closer. I ran. I zig-zagged and made sure to rub my scent on different trees before running in an opposite direction. In an attempt to confuse the werewolf, I howled as well before sprinting off once more. I came to a clearing near a lake and came to a studdering halt.

Four figures appeared in a cloud of black inky smoke wearing silver, glinting masks. Without wasting time to think I fired off spells while dodging theirs. I was able to stuptify one while receiving a cutting hex to my wand arm. I hissed in pain and turned around to face the other opponents. Two sent identical red spells at me and I crouched and cast _incarcerous_ and bound one deatheater. One of the remaining two sent a purple curse at my leg that burned through the fabric and licked my skin like fire. I petrified the deatheater responsible and limped out of the way of another curse, green this time. I easily disarmed and bound him before collapsing on the ground in exhaustion.

My relief was short lived when two dementors swooped down from the night sky. _Bloody simulation._ Before the cold emptiness could consume me, I quickly thought of sitting in front of the fireplace at the Potter’s household on Christmas Eve. I sent out my patronus and was blinded by a large white dog form. _Padfoot_. I stood there in shock for a moment while the shrieking sounds of dementors fleeing faded away.

The forest surrounding me faded away and I was met with three thoroughly shocked people. One was my defense professor and the other two looked to be aurors.

“That was the most intense simulation we’ve scored.” The female auror said finaly.

“And by far the most impressive. I really hope you’re considering being an auror, we could use a good fight like you.” I recognized the voice and realized with a shock that this was Mad-Eye Moody. Of course, now he still has both legs and both eyes so he can’t be called Mad-Eye yet.

“T-thank you, sir.” I breathed, finally.

“Simulations are based on your previous experience as well as what your skill with defense magic is capable of.” I nodded at my professor’s explanation.

“I’m very curious how you would know how to confuse a blood thirsty werewolf, take down four dark wizards, and survive a dementor attack.”

“Moody please, this girl is exhausted and those curses were very real, can’t the interrogation wait? It’s a wonder she’s still standing.”

Moody huffed but stayed silent. He continued to look at me suspicion clear on his expression. If he still had his fake eye, no doubt would it be going mad.

I sat down on a transfigured bed while a healer began to heal the burn on my leg. I knew it would leave a nasty purple scar to match the one on my chest. The curse hurt just as it did the last time I was hit.

“You know, everything in that simulation, came from your experiences, meaning that it was nothing you haven’t faced before.” My professor said quietly.

Without looking away from my leg, I reached up and hooked a finger in the collar of my shirt and brought it down a ways to expose my purple scar in an answer.

She gasped. “Please professor, we both know the state I arrived at this school in. I’m no stranger to the war outside.” I said, still not meeting her eyes.

We were silent for a long time, the only sound coming from the healer who had finished wrapping my thigh and had moved on to the cut on my arm.

“You know, I couldn’t help but notice that your patronus was no longer the otter it was at the beginning of the year.” She said with a smug grin. I blushed. We both knew what that meant.

I was in love with Sirius Black.

* * *

As soon as I was released from the classroom having received full marks, I made my way down to the dungeons. After Harry first taught us how to cast a patronus, I read every book the library had on the subject. I didn’t believe that something like love could really change one’s purest embodiment of happiness. When I saw that Tonks’s patronus had changed to match Remus’s werewolf, I was still unconvinced. When I saw the white silvery grim shoot out of my wand, I realized it in that moment. It makes sense really, I feel safe with Sirius. It’s no wonder his representation would protect me as well.

I came to the door I was searching for and turned the nob. I slowly walked over to the mirror. Once again I read the ornate inscription.

_erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi_

What do I truly desire?

I looked in the mirror and felt tears prickle at the corners of my eyes but for a very different reason this time. I saw myself standing with a huge smile. All my scars were still present but I looked truly happy. Sirius was standing behind me his arms wrapped around my protruding stomach. That was when I noticed the glinting ring on my left ring finger. James and Lily stood next to us holding a small black haired baby with no scar on his forehead. Regulus stood next to Sirius with a hand on his shoulder. Remus stood with Andromeda and Ted and a smaller Tonks between them. The entire Weasley family was there with much younger boys all running around in-between everyone’s legs.

It was my family and it was happiness.

I wasn’t sure how long I sat there watching the happy scene. Sirius eventually found me. He didn’t say anything, he just sat down and put an around me and pulled me against his side. We both looked in the mirror for a long time.

“What does it show?” Sirius asked quietly.

“You’re hearts greatest desire.” I whispered. He nodded and pulled me tighter against him. I wondered what he sees.

“When you didn’t come find us after your practical we were worried.”

“Apparently, mine was the most intense simulation they scored.” I moved my leg to where he could see the bandage.

“What’d you have to do?” He whispered as he lightly brushed his fingers over the wrappings.

“Run from a werewolf, fight four deatheaters, fend off two dementors.”

He exhaled slowly but didn’t say anything.

He held my hand and rubbed his thumb across my knuckles. He paused at the faint scar on my index finger.

“When I think about this war that we’re about to fight in, I become afraid. Afraid that all my friends won’t make it out. When I think about you fighting alongside me, I become terrified but incredibly proud.” He looked up at me. “When I look in the mirror, I see you standing with me and Prongs and Lily and Remus and little baby Harry running around being chased by a little girl with black curly hair.”

I felt a tear fall down my cheek. “ _Expecto Patronum_ ” I whispered. A silvery Padfoot ran around us before disappearing again. “I see the same thing, Sirius.” He looked at me for a long moment.

Silver meeting caramel.

“I love you, Hermione Granger.” I smiled.

“I love you, Sirius Black.” He grinned.

* * *

Within the following days, Dumbledore had given everyone a letter asking them to meet in his office after the graduation ceremony. There was no question what it was about. I had already given fair warning what Dumbledore would want from everyone.

The ceremony went smoothly. Sirius loudly proclaimed his undying love for Minnie, to which she replied in jest that he has one final detention, a tear slowly making its way down her cheek. James proposed to Lily during their Heads speeches. Dumbledore passed out everyone’s certificates. I finally felt that prideful, accomplished feeling I’d been working towards since I first walked through this castle. For a long time I never thought I’d make it through. I looked at James and thought about how proud his parents would have been if the war hadn’t taken them. I thought about Sirius, who lost his parents to the war as well in a much different way and how they didn’t even come. I thought about Remus and his father’s open disgust towards him and wondered why he bothered to show up. I met Lily’s parents and tried not to notice the absence of her sister. We all lost our family but found it in each other.

Later that evening found us in the headmaster’s office. I listened to him explain why we were chosen and the dangers we will face. I watched everyone immediately express their willingness to fight. I tried not to notice McGonagall’s sad eyes watching her students pledge their lives to the Order and I tried even harder not to scowl at Dumbledore’s barely hidden excitement at the prospect of more pawns in his game.

Little does he know, there’s a new player.


	14. Chapter 14

**SIRIUS**

“It’s hot.”

“James, quit whining.” Lily panted.

“At least it isn’t raining.” Remus added.

“Maybe this is why Dumbledore went alone last time.” I chuckled at Hermione’s grumbling.

After many weeks into the summer, we were finally all available to go retrieve our first horcrux. Ever since our induction, Dumbledore has had us doing multiple missions for the Order. Remus was immediately used as a gateway into werewolf camps, something none of us were happy about- especially Hermione- when he came back with multiple new scars and injuries. James and I had been partnered on reconnaissance missions while Hermione and Lily took our second shifts. Peter, much to everyone’s dismay, had been inducted as well and sent on his own missions too. Hermione warned us we’d have to still play his friend so not to gain suspicion from Dumbledore.

It felt like it’d been forever since we were together as a group. Hermione seemed to think that Dumbledore was doing this on purpose to alienate her, especially from me. We all agreed that after we got this horcrux we’d have a drink like old times. Despite being just a month out of school, we’ve all managed to age a few years. So here we were, in the sweltering heat, in the middle of a clearing, in Little Hangleton, searching for an ominous shack.

“Are we there yet?”

“Do you see a shack, James?” Hermione asked exasperatedly.

“A shack isn’t much to go on…” Remus grumbled, it was close to another full moon so we couldn’t blame him for being on a shorter fuse.

“I’ve found horcruxes with _much_ less information. The fact that we know where it is and what it is, is a _lot_ to go by.” Hermione’s patience seemed to have thinned considerably in the past hour. I threw my arm around her and pulled her into my side.

“Sirius, it’s too hot!” She cried, trying to throw me off. I barked a laugh and locked my arms around her while she struggled. Everyone had stopped by now, amusedly welcoming the distraction. Eventually, Hermione gave up trying and stopped with her face buried in my chest with my arms tightly around her in a hug. She didn’t return the embrace.

“You smell.” She said finally. Her voice muffled by my shirt. I started chuckling and stopped.

“Smell?” I muttered.

“Of course you do it’s scorching out here!” James laughed.

“No, no, _smell_!” At they’re confused looks, I transformed into Padfoot and pranced around with my nose up in the air. The breeze blew through the air, lifting my fur, I turned my snout into it and sniffed. At first, all I smelled was grass and mud, then I smelled the faint scent of wet, rotting boards; I also caught whiff of something dead, some decaying carcass.

I perked up my ears and turned to my friends all staring with expectant faces, I woofed and gave chase in direction of the strange scent. I smiled in a way only a dog could, it had been a long time since I last ran as a dog. The electrifying feeling of the ground beneath the pads on my paws to the wind cutting through my thick fur. I looked to my right and saw a disgruntled Lily holding on for _dear_ life on the back of Prongs. I barked at her and she glared. I looked over my shoulder and snorted. Hermione had jumped on Remus’s back and despite lagging behind severely, her smile was huge and her laughter infectious, hair blowing violently in the wind, my heart melted at the sight.

Finally, we made it to a rundown shack, James and I changed back. Remus and Hermione brought up the rear.

“Maybe we should become animagus.” Lily said to Hermione in a shaky breathless tone. We all chuckled. I caught Hermione’s smirk; I raised a challenging eyebrow at her. She held her chin up defiantly and stuck her tongue out. I chuckled and ruffled her hair.

“If you two are done flirting, can we go see what the horrid smell is.” Remus said, scrunching up his nose distastefully.

“Yes, please, it doesn’t take werewolf senses to know that something died in there.” Lily said holding her nose.

“Not in there,” Hermione piped up, cautiously walking around the shack giving it a wide berth, wand in hand. “The Gaunts nailed a snake to their front door.”

“You know, for a family that took pride in being direct descendants of Slytherin, they had a funny way of showing it.” James said, disgusted.

I watched as Hermione began muttering all kinds of revealing spells and warding spells attempting to find hidden traps. I observed, completely engrossed as she bit her lip and waved her wand in complicated patterns breaking down wards and enchantments, a small crease formed on her brow in concentration. I heard James snort and looked over to see him attempt to hide his laughter behind his hand while Lily hit him on the arm and gave me an appreciative smile. I heard Remus mutter something about a “love sick puppy” and I rolled my eyes. Maybe I’m going soft. One look at my brilliant witch sighing frustrated and running her hand through her wild curls told me I didn’t mind.

“Finally!” Hermione shouted and rushed to the front door. With one hand covering her nose and the other cautiously reaching out for the knob, we waited with a baited breath. She turned it, pushed it open and waited. She sighed and smiled. We all crowded around the doorway and peered inside. Hermione cast a detection spell. Nothing. She walked slowly, testing each floorboard until she found one that was slightly raised. She put pressure on it and it creaked loudly.

Lily screamed. What seemed like thousands of snakes of all different breeds slithered toward Hermione. She froze. I cast the first spell I could think of, which happened to be levicorpus. Hermione shrieked as she turned upsidedown.

“Don’t worry, Kitten, I’ve got you.” I tried to placate, that only seemed to make her panic more. James and Remus were shooting multiple fire, cutting, and stunning hexes at all the snakes. Lily pointed her wand at the largest cluster of danger noodles and cast a nonverbal bombarda and shrieked as snake guts exploded on all of us. At the loud noise, the rest of the snakes slithered off. I carefully let Hermione down. She staggered a bit and I caught her.

“Sorry.” She said sheepishly. “I don’t very much like snakes. Getting petrified by a giant one will do that to you.” She chuckled weakly. I held her tighter. As amazing as her unruly adventures truly were, I still don’t like to think of her in any kind of danger. I’d never tell her this because she’d only believe me to think her weak when really it’s quite the opposite and it would only lead to a pointless argument. Fortunately, she doesn’t question why I hold her to me so tightly, she just lets me.

Remus walked over to the board that creaked earlier and carefully cast a levitating charm on it. The piece of wood easily flew into the air and back on the ground next to the hole that was left in its wake. While keeping an arm around Hermione’s waist, I led us over to peer down into the dark hole. James cast a quick lumos and lowered his wand inside. The thick black void seemed to swallow the light from his wand. Lily sent a flame into the hole and it too did nothing for visibility.

“You’ll have to lower your hand into the hole to retrieve the ring” Hermione whispered. “One of His sick tricks. You can’t see what will likely attack you.”

“Bloody protections” I grumbled.

“I’ll do it, I’m the one that brought you guys-“

“No!” Remus and I shouted at the same time. I looked at him curiously.

“Werewolf healing.” He said. “It’s a bit better this time of the month, so whatever is going to get me, won’t do as much as it would to any of you guys.”

Hermione thought for a moment before conceding. “Fine. But whatever you do, do _not_ put that ring on. That’s how Dumbledore died last time.”

“I thought Snape killed him because the Malfoy spawn couldn’t.” James asked frowning.

“Technicalities.” Hermione said with a wave of her hand. “The curse would’ve killed him anyway, so basically-“

“Don’t put the ring on I got it.” Remus said kneeling down next to the empty space where the void was waiting for him.

He took a deep breath and slowly lowered his hand in, hissing as he got down to his wrist. We watched helplessly as his face contorted with pain. He continued to push on stopping to take deep breaths and grit his teeth. When he was almost down to his upper bicep, he let out a shaky laugh.

“I feel it.” He took more deep breaths and started to bring his arm out. He let out a strangled grunt. I felt Hermione’s grasp on my arm tighten, likely to leave half-moon marks; I didn’t realize when she began to hold it. With a final, strangled cry, Remus brought his arm fully out and collapsed on the ground, panting and sweating. We all rushed over. Lily gagged at the sight and had tears running down her face. All James could do was hold her and stand in shock. Hermione immediately went into healer mode retrieving all sorts of potions and bandages from her bag while muttering healing spells. All I could do was stare. I had watched Moony transform before, once on a moon when we didn’t leave in time. The sight of his arm had nothing on that. I looked like it had been grinded to a pulp, every bone was crushed and the skin flayed and hanging in bits. I wouldn’t know until later that night when Hermione tells us that he’d been cursed severely as well giving his arm an underlying purple tinge. For a guilty moment, I was glad Hermione hadn’t been the one to retrieve the bloody thing.

I watched with rapt attention and admiration as Hermione forced blood replenishing potion and skele-grow and multiple other potions down his throat while simultaneously muttering spells and applying dittany and murtlap essence. While she was wraping up the last bandage and forcing a sleeping potion to his mouth, Remus looked at me and muttered “Lucky dog.” Before falling unconscious.

James, coming out of his own stupor, lifted him up into his arms. We agreed to meet at James and my flat and we watched the two boys disapperated. I watched as Lily levitated the board back into place and Hermione scooped up the ring into her bag, careful not to touch it. We walked outside, making sure to leave no trail behind before we too disapperated to go to the flat.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

As soon as I saw Remus’s arm in shreds, I had an intense flashback to Ron getting splinched. My mind went into overdrive and the next thing I knew James was disappearing with a bandaged Moony in his arms. I didn’t register the extent of my healing until I followed everyone to James ad Sirius’s flat and was immediately pulled into a bone crushing hug.

“Where did you learn healing like that?” Lily breathed, releasing me.

I chuckled weakly. “Lots of medical texts.”

“That kind of healing doesn’t come from books.” James noted.

I cleared my throat. “No, no, that… comes from experience.” I whispered. Everyone grew silent. Sirius wrapped his arms around me from behind protectively. The only noise was Remus’s even breathing from the couch.

“It seems that we don’t really know you, despite what you’ve told us.” Lily ventured cautiously.

“That’s because everything you know is part of an objective timeline that isn’t specific to me other than my involvement.” I explained.

“Well why don’t we play a game, yeah? Bit of quid pro quo?” James said as he disappeared towards the kitchen. When he came back he was holding a vile filled with clear liquid.

“Where the hell did you get Veritaserum?” I asked incredulously.

“Nicked it.” James said.

“Liberated it.” Sirius added.

“Brewed it.” Lily said.

I sighed exasperatedly.

“Shouldn’t we wait on Remus?” I asked.

“Nah, he hates this game.” James said as he poured the potion.

“Besides we’ll tell him all about it anyway.” Sirius said making his way over to an armchair. I tried to walk by him but he grabbed me around the waist and tugged me to sit in his lap.

“So the rules are pretty simple,” James said as he sat down and pulled Lily into a similar position as I was. “We can ask each other any question as long as we’re prepared to answer it as well. The serum is mixed with butterbeer so we won’t get too drunk but we’ll also be compelled to tell the truth for that turn. Just drink and ask someone a question, they’ll drink too and you’ll both answer. Makes sense?”

Everyone nodded.

“Alright, I’ll start us off easy,” James said taking a drink. “Who was your first kiss? Mine was Marlene.”

“You already know it was Severus.” She said.

“Yeah but I didn’t. What the hell?!” Sirius looked put out.

I started laughing. “Oh come on, even I could’ve guessed that they were friends for years.”

“Alright then so I’m to assume your first kiss was either my godson or the redhead bloke because you were friends for years?”

“Why don’t you ask me and find out.” I challenged. He smirked and took a drink. I followed.

“Kitten,” He said sweetly. “Who was your first kiss? Mine was Bellatrix.” I sputtered and looked at him with wide eyes.

“She held me down against my will, don’t give me that look. Now answer the question.” He smirked.

“Viktor Krum.” I mirrored his smirk. It was James’s turn to sputter.

“Krum?”

“Seeker for the Bulgarian National Team in my time. Son of Iyalko Krum who-“

“Who’s only the best chaser in the league this season!” James looked like he would faint. Lily condescendingly patted his head while trying- and failing- to hold in her giggles.

“I think that truth has a story attached to it.” Sirius gave me look.

I sighed. “Fourth year we had the Triwizard Tournament and Viktor was one of the champions. He invited me to the Yule Ball and that was pretty much it. He took me for a walk by the gardens, it was very sweet.” Sirius scoffed.

“What happened after that? Did you guys date?” Lily asked with a dreamy look in her eye.

“No we didn’t date.” I laughed. “He couldn’t even pronounce my name correctly.” Sirius laughed at this, clearly over his moment of jealousy. “By the end of the year the war had started again and he went back to Bulgaria, we tried to send owls but I stopped after a while, I was too afraid they’d be intercepted.” Everyone had a somber look about them at this point.

I cleared my throat. “Lily, what’s the hardest potion you’ve ever brewed? Mine was the Wolfsbane potion I used to brew for Remus.” I tried to lighten the mood.

“Oh, I once tried to brew Felix Felicis, it didn’t go so well.” She laughed. “The potion ended up having the opposite effect so I went around that day with the worst luck you could imagine.”

“I remember that day,” James chuckled. “You came into Binns’s class and simultaneously tripped, spilled your entire bag on the floor, ripped your uniform and hit your head and knocked yourself out cold.”

“Ah, yes. Lily’s bad luck turned into James’s good luck when he got to carry Lily up to the hospital wing.” Sirius said wiping tears from his face from laughing so hard.

“What’s the biggest rule you’ve broken? I’m an unregistered animagus so I think that takes it.” James asked once everyone had calmed down.

“I practically kidnapped someone and then blackmailed them.” At their shocked faces I continued. “She was a reporter and she wrote horrid things about Harry and I and I figured out she was a beetle animagus so I kept her in a jar for a while. Then I told her to write a truthful story about the return of Voldemort or I’d out her as unregistered.”

“Pads, your girlfriend is fucking ruthless.” Everyone came out of their shock at this and laughed.

“I know.” Sirius said fondly. I smiled.

Everyone took turns asking questions. On more than one occasion we broke down into fits of laughter over a favorite prank or spell mishap. I told them about Fred and George’s legendary exit in fifth year and James and Sirius named them worthy heirs to their legacy. Sirius asked me if I ever hexed anyone and I told them about Edgecombe signing the cursed parchment and her permanent disfigurement. Lily asked about my first instance with the term ‘Mudblood’ and I told her about Draco and Ron’s wand backfiring. They asked what my least favorite subject was and I told them about my dramatic exit from Trelawney’s class. Eventually, they got to more depressing questions that only I could answer. And it basically turned into them asking about my past. I didn’t mind, however, I wanted them to truly know me. My past comes with that.

“What’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever done? I think mine would have to be becoming animagi. Even though we were successful, it was still really idiotic.” Sirius was trying to go for a lighthearted question, but the Veritaserum had other plans. My mouth moved of its own accord.

“I howled at a werewolf on a full moon to attract its attention away from Padfoot.” Everyone paled at the confession. I took a deep breath.

“That one deserves a story I think.” I cleared my throat. Sirius snaked his arms around my midsection. “You all know how I used a time turner in my third year to take more classes right?” Everyone nodded. “Well, that was also the year Sirius broke out of Azkaban. We all thought that he was after Harry when really he was after Ron’s pet rat who was actually Pettigrew. To make a long story short, Sirius cornered all of us under the whomping willow and Remus was there and everyone was arguing and we realized who the rat really was and in all the commotion Remus had forgotten to take his potion. It was a full moon that night. He transformed and Padfoot tried to protect us but ended up getting injured. By this point Harry and I had gone back in time so the other me was in the forbidden forest and I howled to draw attention away. The werewolf chased us through the forest, it was quite terrifying until a hippogriff chased him away. Then, Harry conjured a powerful patronus and saved Sirius from dementors, and we flew on said hippogriff to free Sirius from a classroom where he was being held to be kissed.”

Everyone was silent contemplating my story. So quiet that no one noticed the figure on the couch sit up. “How can you be in the same room as me?” Everyone jumped. “How do you not fear me after I ch-chased you?” His eyes were flashing gold with emotion. He was verging on hysterical.

“Remus…” I stood up slowly.

“No! How can you look at me?” His hands were grasping his hair. I noticed his bandage turning red from his frantic movements.

“Remus. Calm down, you’ve opened your wounds…” I walked towards him.

“I’m a monster. Even with the potion I- I- I’m dangerous. I’m a monster.” His voice cracked on his last word and he fell into the couch, palms into his eyes, elbows resting on his knees. He looked as broken as he felt. I crouched down in front of him and slowly grabbed his hands and pulled them away from his face so he would look at me.

“You are not a monster.” I whispered. “It was a bad situation and we never blamed you.”

“I could’ve hurt you. I would’ve never forgiven myself.” His eyes were no longer flashing, his pale blue eyes shown with so much anguish I felt my heart shred.

“You didn’t hurt us. And you did forgive yourself.” I gave a small smile and he slowly returned it. “It’s no use blaming yourself for something you didn’t do.”

“Yeah, mate, this was in the future and I’m pretty sure it won’t have a repeat performance.” James placated.

“Yeah, I don’t plan on becoming a mass murderer and distracting you any time soon.” Everyone started chuckling. I gave Remus a relieved hug and went to change his bandages.

“So do I get to interrogate you too?” Remus asked.

“Well I think so since you decided to wake up.” We chuckled.

“Could you tell us about your scars? You already know where mine come from.” My hands stilled for a moment on his arm. I took a breath and finished wrapping his arm. I went back to sit with Sirius. He immediately put his arms around my middle a lot tighter than before.

“You already know where this one came from.” I gestured to my left forearm. Sirius growled. “This one,” I pointed to a thin white line at my neck. “Was when Bellatrix held me at knife point right before Dobby rescued us.” I rolled up my pants leg and pointed out a thick, raised mark on the inside of my ankle. “This one was when I broke my ankle at Bathilda Bagshot’s house. Harry and I went to Godric’s Hollow to see his parent’s g-gravesites. It was a trap, Voldemort knew we would go there and his snake attacked us and then He showed up. We were lucky, but I’ll always walk with a limp now.”

I held up my right hand and undid my glamour charm so everyone could see the deep, white lines that spell ‘ _I must refrain from being a filthy little know-it-all_.’ “My fifth year, Dolores Umbridge was made the defense teacher. She used blood quills on all of us as her form of detention-“

“Did she use it on Harry?” Lily asked, anger ever-present on her features.

I nodded. “His said ‘ _I must not tell lies.’_ ” I replaced my glamour charm. “Don’t worry, I gave her over to the centaurs in the Forbidden Forrest.” I said ominously.

“Pads, like I said, _fucking ruthless_.” Sirius smirked.

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and lifted the bottom of my shirt so everyone could see the purple scar that mars my still too thin torso. I heard a gasp. “This one I also got fifth year. Harry thought Sirius was being tortured in the Department of Mysteries so Harry, Ron and I as well as three others rode thestrals to and broke into the Ministry. It was a trap, Sirius wasn’t there but deatheaters were.” I felt Sirius tighten his hold. I let a tear fall from my still closed eyes. “I was fighting and he started to say the curse but I silenced him before he could finish. They said it’s probably the only thing that saved my life. It was purple fire and it felt cold, like my nerves were freezing rather than being burned. I was in the hospital wing for weeks. And-” I choked back a sob. “They said that because it hit my abdomen, the chances of having kids are almost non-existent. And after being under the Cruciatus so much…”

I broke.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

I looked around at the shocked faces around me. Remus was pale, making the scars on his face more prominent. James was staring a hole in the floor while holding an equally shocked Lily. She had tears pouring down her cheeks. I tried not grimace at the obvious pity reflecting back from her emerald orbs knowing that Hermione wouldn’t like to be pitied.

And Hermione. _Merlin_. I knew she’d suffered through some shit, but I never expected this. I’d always assumed she’d want kids eventually. Now it seems life is holding it at arm’s reach. Hasn’t she suffered enough? I held her tighter, she buried her face in my chest. I kissed her forehead and rubbed circles on her back. She cried harder if it were possible. I methodically ran my fingers through the curls I love so much and wondered how long she’s held on to this piece of information.

“Did Harry and Ron know?” Even though I whispered it, everyone heard it.

“No.” She croaked. “Ron was practically in love with me, he wanted a huge family like what he grew up with, and Harry,” She cried. “He would’ve pitied me. He always wanted his own family…” She trailed off and I gently guided her head back to my chest. I continued my ministrations and whispered reassurances.

Eventually, people began to nod off. Remus was in a dead sleep on the couch. Lily was asleep on James’s shoulder. James was fighting to keep his eyes open. His exhaustion won out and he carried Lily to his room. I looked at the sleeping witch currently resting on my chest. She was the first to succumb to sleep. I marveled at the peaceful expression on her face. How such a girl can go through all she has and stay so strong and still be able to have peaceful sleeps. I put one arm around her back and the other under her knees and made to stand up. She began to whimper. I held her close and quickly stood and walked us down the hallway to my bedroom. I laid her down on top of the comforter and quickly pulled off her shoes and outer robes before tucking her underneath the covers. I quickly threw on pajama bottoms and made to leave to sleep on the couch when her voice stopped me.

“Stay?” It was barely whispered but compelled me as much as a shout would. I walked over to her and crouched to where we were at eye level.

“Are you sure?” I said quietly. She nodded. I went around to the other side of my bed and got underneath the covers and wrapped my arms around her small frame and held her close. She rested her head on my bare chest right over where my heart lies.

“Do you have a shirt I could borrow? I don’t particularly want to sleep in jeans.” I chuckled and told her which drawer to look in. She quickly got up and began to search through my drawer for a suitable shirt. To say I was surprised when she confidently- and might I say deliberately- began to undress knowing I was watching, was an understatement. I was, however, very happy with her color choice for knickers. When she pulled the shirt over her head I groaned.

“You are going to be the death of me, witch.” Something about seeing your name across your girlfriend’s back really ignites a fierce possessiveness in a bloke. She wears Black well. And so does her arse.

“Your quidditch jersey is soft.” She said once she was back under the covers. “And it smells like you.” I laughed.

“I’ll let you keep it,” I promised. “If you enlighten me as to what I smell like.”

She gave a small smile. “Leather, like your leather jacket, and a faint smell of muggle cigarettes before they’re lit, and it’s masked by your cologne, as if you tried to hide it.” She closed her eyes and breathed deep. “You smell the same as from my time.” She admitted.

“I do?” I was intrigued.

“Yes, I was surprised when I got here, but when you first held me, I was taken back to when your older self hugged me Christmas of my fifth year.” She smiled. I smiled too.

We laid there in silence for a long time. I thought she had gone to sleep. Then I remembered a question that’s been bugging me since the day I found her by the thestrals.

“Hermione?” I whispered.

“Hmm?” She murmured sleepily.

“Can I ask you one more question?” I felt her nod on my chest.

“Who allowed you to see the thestrals?”

She sighed. “It was during the Department of Mysteries battle. I’d been cursed, but I was still conscious. The Order had shown up and everyone was fighting. Bellatrix was there and Sirius was fighting her. She was playing with her hexes and Sirius was laughing. We were in the Death Chamber, there was this archway with a black curtain blowing in the nonexistent wind. Harry said he could hear whispers behind it but I never heard anything. Bellatrix sent a stunner at Sirius and he was hit and sent through the veil. Time seemed to stop, Remus was holding Harry back. Harry was screaming. But Bellatrix was _skipping_ through the room screeching “I killed Sirius Black””

I’d seen the veil she described, and I heard my cousin’s sing-song voice gloating my death. It was her boggart, one of her _worst_ fears.

“I’m not going anywhere” I whispered. She turned around and looked at me. In her haste, my jersey had fallen off her shoulder. I placed my hand against her cheek.

“Sirius, I can’t have kids. There won’t be more Blacks.” I brushed my thumb across her lips.

“Love, we don’t need kids to be happy. We could adopt if you want, but I’m also content being the cool Uncle Padfoot.” She cracked a small smile. “Reggie can carry on the Black name, it was never of importance to me anyways.” I kissed her forehead and moved to kiss each of her closed eyelids and then each of her cheeks. “I’m in love with you, not your ability to give me children.” And I kissed her lips, softly, sweetly.

“Can’t is a strong term, Kitten. Don’t give up hope, yet.” I whispered before our exhaustion got the better of us and we both fell into a tranquil sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah and we've made it to my cringy smut scene.
> 
> So WARNING: for smut. I have bolded the first and last bit of the scene so you can skip it.

**HERMIONE**

I used to love colder weather when I was younger- especially at Hogwarts. It gave me the excuse to wrap in a warm blanket with a cup of tea and read peacefully, fireplace roaring in the background. After spending months in a tent facing the elements, the novelty has lost its appeal. Now, my joints creak with the waning coldness and my skin is stretched thin and dry with anticipation. My beautiful façade melted to the coldness.

Currently my cloak was doing my frigid bones no justice. I relented the fact it was probably made more for protection than comfort. My body was stiff and sore from crouching so long, I looked over at my partner and noted she must be feeling the same if her constant movement was anything to go by.

“How much longer do you think we’ll have to wait?” Lily yawned, stretching her spine.

We’ve been positioned in the forest undergrowth behind a muggle neighborhood that Dumbledore’s “sources” claimed was a target of the next attack. We’ve been here for nearly eighteen hours so no wonder Lily was looking tired. It was now sometime in the late afternoon. I hadn’t noticed the time much, I’d been wrought with anticipation for the attack, wand in my hand which was twitching to perform a spell. So not to be seen by muggles, we’ve been stuck crouched in the thick greenery. Lily had long since gave up on crouching and was now slumped against a tree, snow soaking through her clothes.

“I’m not sure.” I replied distractedly. Most of the Order were stationed around here as well, just in case.

“You’d think they’d give us shifts for this, I’d kill for a nice, hot ba-“

There was an explosion.

People in dark cloaks were apperating all over in front of us.

“Shit!” I scrambled up and took aim at the first dark figure I saw and stuptified him. I started running toward the sound of the explosion noticing the smoke billowing from the area. I glanced behind me and Lily was sprinting behind me in that direction as well. I heard screams, I sprinted faster.

We made it to the source of the smoke and what I saw gave me pause. The Order members, naturally, were dueling death eaters, that wasn’t anything short of ordinary. However, the remaining death eaters that didn’t have their hands full were focused on the muggles. Normally, in a raid, death eaters would kill as many muggles as possible, conjure the Dark Mark in the sky and escape. This time, however, they were _toying_ with them. Torture, beatings, rape, people were being levitated in the air.

It was reminiscent of the Quidditch Cup my summer before fourth year. That had been a warning then.

What is it a warning for tonight?

I couldn’t dwell on that thought for too long before I was roped into another duel. The man looked more like a boy, and he fought like a student in the dueling lessons. I had him on conscious and tied in ropes within three minutes. I looked around and saw more of the same, these must have been newer recruits.

Why would Lord Voldemort send his weakest followers on a raid of this measure?

Then it hit me. Like a killing curse to the chest I realized that _none_ of his stronger followers were here.

This was a distraction. A fluke.

“Lily!” She stunned her death eater and looked over. “This is a distrac-“

There was a bigger explosion from somewhere far off in the distance.

**SIRIUS**

Auror training was brutal. Auror training chased with an Order mission was worse. Lucky for James and I, we didn’t have a misson tonight for the first time in a while. We left the ministry, ordered take-out, and apperated the the flat we shared to celebreate.

“It’s a shame Moony couldn’t make it tonight.” James lamented over a bottle of butterbear sometime after we finished dinner.

“It’s a full moon, even with his bloody potion he wouldn’t chance it.” I sighed, getting up to put on a Sex Pistols record.

James sighed and sat back on the couch. “Shame our girls couldn’t make it either, bloody war.”

“We’ll have them all to ourselves soon enough, ‘Mione’s gonna end this bullshit.” I smiled as ‘God Save the Queen’ sounded through the empty space in the flat. That was all there was for a while.

“I’m going to ask her to marry me.” James said finally.

“I bloody hope not, that’s my bird you’re talking about.” I laughed.

“No, you daft prick, my bird.” It got quiet despite the music still playing. “I went to my vault the other day. Picked out a ring.”

“I’ll be the best man of course, provided she doesn’t turn you down.”

“Do you even have to ask, Padfoot?” He laughed and hit me on the shoulder.

It wasn’t until ‘Pretty Vacant’ came on when one of us broke the thoughtful silence that had developed between us.

“They’ll be alright tonight… right, Sirius?”

“You feel it too then?”

“Something’s not quite right.”

“They’ll be okay.” We lapsed into silence once more, trying to believe our placation, trying to ignore the feeling hanging in the air. The record had long since ended.

A white phoenix flew through the flat and halted in front of us. Dumbledore’s voice rang through the charged air around us.

“Attack at King’s Cross.”

We shared a look. So much for ignorance.

When we got there it was complete chaos. Platform 9¾ was more crowded than usual, that was when I noticed the Hogwarts Express sitting on the tracks. Families were frantic, students were reluctant to get off the train. The Order was vastly outnumbered as most of us were in a different location expecting a different attack. Aurors were showing up as well.

I quickly found myself in a duel with a masked man. Black robes billowing around him as he cast curses at me. I started laughing at the rush this duel caused. Maybe this is why people think the Black family is mad. He grazed me with his fire curse just before I hexed him across the landing. He hit a pillar and was knocked unconscious.

I joined James in his fight against two death eaters, evening the odds. Auror training had done wonders for our fighting, but fighting together we were no match for most. Quickly we took down both men. We saw a group of scared families and fought our way over.

“Filthy muggles have no right being on our platform!” We heard one yell.

“Your spawn doesn’t deserve their stolen magic!” Screeched another.

“I think we should teach them a lesson, don’t you, dear sister?” I now recognize them as the Carrow twins.

“Here, take this one, brother, show us her filthy muggle blood!” She pushed a tiny girl down on the platform in front of the group. Alecto pulled out a long dagger and started toward her. My stomach turned. I threw a hex after him. James got caught up fighting off another death eater, I continued to send curses toward Alecto.

Another man in a black cloak stepped in my way and began to duel. Alecto noticed I was held up and grasped the little girl by her hair exposing her neck. Her hair was brunette. I sent a frantic curse in his direction and noted with sick satisfaction that it hit. She had wild curls. The man in the black cloak continued to attempt to distract me. Her eyes looked like molten caramel. Alecto held his grasp on the child and brought the knife to her neck. Her eyes held obvious fear and desolate helplessness. I shot another desperate curse. Her blood was red. And so was his.

I didn’t hear the screams of the family members. I didn’t hear Amycus’s screeching cheers. I didn’t notice Dumbledore’s appearance. I heard my blood rushing in my ears. I looked at the masked man currently dueling me. I sent curse after curse, unrelenting force, I was gaining ground stepping closer and closer. The man was fully cloaked, the only discernable feature was his raven hair. His mask was covering the entirety of his face. This made me angrier.

“You coward! You can’t even show your fucking face!” He’d stopped throwing curses. I was close enough to punch him, so I did. He fell on the floor, as did his mask.

“R-Reggie?” I croaked. He looked at me with a bored expression masking his aristocratic features. Only his swirling silver irises betrayed him. He looked terrified.

“Why’d you do it Reg?” I whispered. I lowered my wand.

A curse hit me and all I felt was pain. I crumpled to my knees with the familiar ache of the cruciatus. I didn’t register that I was screaming. I heard Bellatrix’s maniacal laughter but somewhere in there, I heard another voice tell me quietly, “I’m sorry, brother.”

My world went black.

**HERMIONE**

The fighting wasn’t over until closer to midnight. Some of the Order left to fight the other battle, but left the rest of us to secure the muggle neighborhood. Despite being second string death eaters, they had us on in sheer number. Eventually, someone cast _morsmordre_ and that must have been the signal to leave because then cleanup began. I was relieved to return to my shared flat with Lily, after witnessing so many broken families, I was heavily reminded of the feeling of loss.

My relief was short lived when I arrived and found the living room empty and the telltale sounds of sobbing coming from Lily’s bedroom. Worried and curious, I made my way to the door and cracked it open to listen in.

“…about your parents. I know how it feels.” I heard James’s voice say. Lily’ sobs grew louder. My heart broke for the girl.

“I-I j-just don’t know w-why they were at K-king’s Cross anyway.” She dissolved into tears once more, muffled only by what I can assume was James’s shoulder.

“Y-you should b-be with S-Sirius. H-he’s h-hurt.” I froze.

“He’s alright, it’s nothing he hasn’t been through before.” My heart was beating against my ribcage.

“T-that’s not very r-reassuring.” I had to agree with Lily.

“It was just Bella-“ I ran to the floo and called out the name of James and Sirius’s flat.

* * *

“Ah fuck woman, warn a bloke!” Sirius said picking up the remains of his teacup that had fallen with my unannounced arrival, apparently. I all but sprinted into him and nearly toppled us to the floor if the counter hadn’t caught him.

“Fucking hell, Kitten.” He said softer, but still surprised, while he petted my hair.

“I’ll fucking kill that bitch.” I snarled.

“Launguage, love.” He chuckled.

“Fuck language.” I growled still angry.

“ **I love** it when you talk dirty to me.” His amusement dwindling, rapidly being replaced with something else. Tea cup laid forgotten on the floor.

“I can do a lot more than just _fucking_ talking.” I don’t know when my anger turned to arousal, but it’s not unwelcome.

“You know what your foul mouth does to me, Kitten, keep talking like that and I’ll ravage you right here on this counter.” He whispered huskily into my ear. My previous anger depleting, I shivered.

“And what if I wanted you to fuck me into the mattress?” I breathed against his neck.

That broke the spell. His mouth found mine and he pushed my into the hall against the wall. His tongue met mine and sent shivers of heat to my core. Willing to take over dominance, I pushed him across the hall against the opposite wall. His tongue expertly pulled my lip into his mouth and he nibbled gently. I unconsciously whimpered. In my distracted state, he flipped us around with him pushing me against the wall again. I growled. He smirked. I bit his lip, He hissed and pulled back. Looking me in the eyes, he took both of my arms and held them about my head and began placing open mouthed kisses down my neck.

He held my wrists with both hands and used the other to hitch my leg up around his waist allowing him to step between my legs. I felt the tent in his trousers start to grind against my core torturously slow. My knee started go weak, noticing this, he used his other arm to grab my other leg and bring it up to meet the other one. The new angle brought another wave of heat coursing through my body. His lips found mine once more. I needed to feel him. I began unbuttoning his shirt, but my fingers wouldn’t work. Frustrated, I ripped his shirt open and peeled his shirt off.

“Kitten.” He said in a husky voice against my collarbone. The feel of his breath made me shiver.

Taking that as confirmation, he carried me down the hall to his bedroom removing my own shirt along the way. He threw me unceremoniously on his bed and against my will I whimpered at the loss of contact. I crawled over to where he was standing and started unbuckling his belt slowly, teasingly grazing his hardened cock through his pants. He groaned. I smirked. He brushed my fingers away and divested his pants himself, frustrated with my teasing.

He crawled on the bed and gently pushed me down on the comforter before leaning over to kiss me again. This kiss was different from the others, whereas they were frantic and lustful, this one was sweet and filled with love. I was having none of it. I ran my fingers through his hair and pulled his face to the side so I could have access to his neck. He took advantage of the angle and placed wet, openmouthed kissed along my collarbone and across my chest. He reached behind me and unclasped my bra and flung it across the room behind him. He moved his mouth lower and then skipped over and gently nibbled the underside of my breast. He made his way back up and took my nipple in his mouth. His tongue flicked over the hardened peak over and over, he gently sucked.

“Sirius!” I breathed. My fingers grasping his raven locks.

He pulled away and gently blew cold air over the wet mound. I don’t know how it’s possible to feel so heated and cold at the same time. Carefully he repeated the process on my other tit while his hand palmed this one. He grabbed my nipple between his finger and thumb and gently rolled it. I moaned and the sensations. He came back up and kissed me again before once again trailing across my jaw and nibbling the skin beneath my ear where he _knows_ makes my shiver, then continuing down my neck and pausing to suck on my pulse point. I felt his hands at my waist undoing my jeans and pushing them down my legs. I helped get them completely off by shuffling my feet.

My hands went to his chest and I slowly drug my nails down reveling in the shivers he was releasing, before stopping at the waistband of his boxers. I looked him in the eyes and he gave a slight nod so I pushed them down to release his hardened cock. I wrapped my hand around the base and slowly rubbed up to circle my thumb around the tip, satisfied by the precum and the slight moan he gave. I slowly started to pump my hand up and down.

“’Mione,” He rasped, grasping my wrist and halting my movements. “if you keep that up any longer I won’t be able to hold out.” He kissed me and pulled my knickers down. He trailed kisses down my body and lower still. I sat up nervously, conscious about where he was going, but any argument was gone when his tongue swept across my clit. I threw my head back into the pillow and moaned. He continued to lap at my nub before wrapping his lips around it and sucking.

“Fuck, Sirius!” I gasped, the heat in my lower abdomen was coiling tight.

He inserted a finger and began pumping in and out. He added another. My fingers grabbed the duvet. My toes curled. He added a third. My hips bucked against his face.

“Come for me, Kitten.” His breath ghosted over my clitoris. He curled his fingers upwards. I saw stars. My back arched. I moaned his name. My breathing was heavy. He continued his ministrations to ride out my orgasm.

He came up to kiss me and I could taste myself on his tongue and I found this wasn’t unpleasant.

“Watching you come undone for me, is the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.” He said in between kisses.

“Sirius, I want you.” I bit my lip. He looked me in the eyes trying to find any uncertainty. “Please, I need you, I love you” I whispered.

“I love you too, Hermione.” He said, leaning up on his forearms, positioning himself at my center.

“Are you sure?” I kissed him in response and he pressed himself in. My breath hitched.

“Don’t tense up, love, relax.” He peppered my face with sweet kisses and pressed further in. I relaxed and wrapped my legs around his hips. When he was buried inside me to the hilt, he paused and waited for me to adjust. Experimentally, I wiggled my hips and nodded.

He started excruciatingly slow, but when I moaned he took the hint and picked up speed. I dug my nails into his back. The sound of his moans mixed with mine made the coil begin to tighten once more. He went faster still and I knew I was getting close. His movements became jerky and my hips rose to meet him. The feeling of his body pressed up against mine, the feeling of him inside me was otherworldly. We fit perfectly together, all the pieces were clicking into place. He reached between us to flick my sensitive clit and I came apart once more, his name on my lips. My walls fluttered around him. He thrusted a few more times before toppling over the edge, my name escaping him like a prayer.

Exhausted, we lay there breathing heavily, both coming down from our highs. He pulled out at last and cast a quick cleaning charm on both of us before pulling the duvet over our naked bodies and wrapping me in his arms. He placed a kiss on my forehead and I rested my ear against his still rapidly beating heart. We didn’t have to say we loved each other, because what we had, we knew. I let the steady rhythm lull me to a blissful **sleep**.

* * *

I awoke only to be blinded by the vast amount of light in the room and the light sensations of fingers ghosting over my various scars. Thoroughly amused, I looked at the owner of said fingers to find that he wasn’t aware I was awake yet. I took this time to study him. His raven colored hair was in disarray from sleep. Despite his aristocratic features, I noticed laugh lines at the corners of his mouth as well as a few tiny freckles along his sharp jawline. His eyes had the beginnings of crow’s feet from crinkling in amusement and his molten irises were alight with curiosity as he traced my own imperfections.

As if feeling my gaze he turned to look at me. Silver meeting caramel.

“Hi.” I whispered.

“Hi, yourself.” He grinned. He’s never been more beautiful to me than in this moment. I leaned up to kissed him sweetly. He hummed against my lips.

“Can we stay in our perfect bubble forever?” I murmured.

He chuckled lightly. “I think you know the answer, love.” I hummed in response.

We were quiet for a moment, each drinking in the other.

“I was worried about you, I found out you got hurt.”

“I’m alright now, love. My beautiful, very naked, girlfriend is in my arms. What more could I ask for?” He kissed my smile. We held each other for a while.

“Lily’s parents are dead.” I whispered.

“I almost killed my brother.”

“What happened yesterday?” I asked slightly shaking my head.

He sighed. “King’s Cross was attacked, you know that.” I nodded. He took a deep breath. “The train was unloading students for holiday. The death eaters decided to round up all the muggleborns and families of muggleborns. The Carrow twins decided to single one out and make an example. She looked so much like you, and for a moment it was you and I couldn’t get to you. And then he sliced her throat and I had failed. I was angry and I was dueling Regulus and I could’ve killed him. Then Bellatrix came.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” I placed a hand on his cheek and he leaned into it. “And you didn’t kill your brother, you hesitated. That means a world of difference.” I said thinking of a particular blonde boy who lowered his wand.

We lapsed into silence again and Sirius traced my scars again only this time stopping on one on the side of my ribs and tracing it multiple times.

“You’ve really got a fascination with that one don’t you?” I raised an eyebrow.

“You don’t recognize this one?” He asked shocked.

“There’s so many I hardly acknowledge new ones anymore.”

“This is the one I gave you.” At my confused look, he continued. “When we were fighting. I sent a slicing hex and hurt you.”

I sat for a moment, thoughtfully before answering. “Well, what are you going to do about it to make you stop feeling so guilty?”

“I’m not sure.” A pensive expression settled over his features.

I thought for a moment. “You could always turn it into something nice.”

“What?”

“Like a tattoo.”

“You want me to give you a tattoo?” He asked incredulously.

“You had a lot of tattoos in my time. I rather like the idea of them myself, if they’re meaningful. And how much more meaningful can you get than this? So I want you to pick one for me, yes.”

He seemed to think about it for a long time before reaching for his wand and looking at it. He looked down at my abdomen and studied the faint white line.

“I’ve decided.” I nodded and allowed him to cast the spell. I half expected getting a magical tattoo would feel like receiving a Dark Mark, however, I only felt a slight, cool, tingling sensation. He pulled his wand away and I looked at the area that had my scar but now only has black runes. At my questioning gaze he explained.

“It’s the markings on my wand.” He held it out and I saw the exact copy of runes was engraved on his wand. “It means-”

“’More or less human.” I finished, my finger now tracing the markings.

I started giggling. At his amused expression, I explained. “I halfway expected you to put Canis Major on me. Talk about marking your territory.”

He barked a laugh.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

Our post-coital bliss was ruined when we heard the floo activate and James’s dulcet tones echoed through the small flat. Quickly, I got up and threw one of my old shirts at Hermione and then stepped into some of my own pajama bottoms. I held out my hand for Hermione to take and when she did, I opened the bedroom door and led the way to the livingroom.

“Pads, I told you not to leave your shirts lying aro- oh.” He said when he finally saw Hermione in my old Beatles shirt, self-consciously pulling the hem to make it longer.

“Yes, oh. What do you need, mate?” I said stepping behind Hermione and holding her wrists so she’d stop stretching my shirt.

“Lily was worried about Hermione. I figured she was here.” He said awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.

“And here I thought you’d come to ask about my wellbeing.” I deadpanned.

“I think your wellbeing is just fine all things considered.” He laughed.

“How is Lily?” Hermione asked.

“Inconsolable, but that’s to be expected. I haven’t been able to get her to eat this morning. I was hoping you had some ideas?”

“Oh of course.” She said stepping away from me towards the floo.

“Um, Kitten?”

“Hmm?” She turned around.

“Maybe pants are required for this job?” I was trying hard- and failing- to contain my smile. Her face went beet red. She walked past us toward my room grumbling about “bloody mutts”.

In the weeks following, I was reminded of the way it felt when Charlus and Dorea died. That feeling of loss and grief was not missed. Never having met the Evans’s I couldn’t be of any help to Lily. I didn’t like feeling useless when a friend was in need. Remus, being the voice of reason in the group was able to get through to her. James was her rock, a constant entity holding her up. Hermione was able to relate with her, having lost all of her previous family. Throughout all of this, Peter’s reaction was most intriguing. He played the concerned friend for Lily, but when the attention was off, he had a bored expression on his face like he had somewhere to be. It made his concern hurt that much more.

My own chance to help Lily came in the form of Petunia Dursley nee Evans. At the funeral, the two sisters got into a row of epic proportions. I knew that the horse woman was dreadful to Lily, but this took it too far. None of the others had ever been cast out by their own family. I was late at night when I woke up to get a drink and found her in the kitchen looking out the window. She’d been practically living at our flat through the whole process. That night, she had tears rolling a constant stream down her face. I lent her my shoulder to cry on.

“Even though it hurts, you’ll come to realize you’re better off without them.” I told her. “I found my family long ago in James and Remus, and it’s expanded to include you and Hermione.” I continued to stroke her soft hair. “Family by choice is stronger than family by blood.”

“That’s what it all comes down to, isn’t it? Blood?” She barely whispered. “Why?”

I didn’t have an answer for her.

* * *

It was the week in between Christmas and New Year’s when Hermione approached me. Christmas was a somber affair this year. A stark contrast to the previous year, only made worse by the absence of loved ones. I could confidently say that no one was looking forward to the New Year. The attacks were getting worse and His following was growing. So when Hermione offered the chance to do something I jumped at the opportunity.

So that found me currently polyjuiced as a nondescript aristocratic pureblood, dressed to the nines and standing in the gardens at Malfoy Manor. Hermione told me that Snive- Snape has it on good authority that Voldemort will present Lucius with an honorable wedding gift this afternoon. I’m not sure what she used to convince Snape to spy for her, and I don’t think I want to know, but it does come in handy. So here I am in a field of snakes with my lovely pureblood wife on my arm. Hermione thought it best to stay together in case the trade went sour.

Biding our time was going well until we were approached by a man in dark dress robes who looked more like a boy playing dress up in his father’s clothes.

He stuck out his hand, I noticed his signet ring. “Regulus Black, heir of the Most Noble and Ancient House of Black.” I shook his hand, but didn’t return the greeting. He swooped down to kiss Hermione’s hand.

“Severus told me you would be in attendance.” This gave me pause. “Would the lady care for a dance?”

I caught Hermione’s eye before he whisked her away. She smirked, the cheeky minx. Apparently, it’s not just Snape who’s turned coat. I felt the faint feeling of hope bubbling in my chest. I watched my brother and my girlfriend dancing closely, more than likely having secret conversation.

“Afraid he’ll steal her away?” I almost choked on my champagne.

“Not at all, Lucius, she likes to give them all a run for their money.”

“Still, it doesn’t do well for a respectable lady to dance that close with anyone but her husband.” He raised his pale eyebrow.

“Nothing to worry about, she always comes back.”

He hummed. “That Black fellow hardly speaks with anyone at gatherings.” He baited.

“Ah, but who could blame him for wanting to make connections with a man of the continent, such as myself.”

Lucius seemed to think this over. “Yes, connections do get you to higher places.”

“And are you?” I goaded.

He looked affronted. “Of course. I was just bestowed a high honor by a man of great importance. Placed it in a respectable place in my drawing room to be seen by business associates. You would do well to meet this man, he is quite the-“

“Sorry to bother, but could I steal my husband for a dance?” She didn’t wait for an answer before dragging me off.

I place my hand on her waist and held up her other arm. “You looked like you needed to be saved.”

I turned us and brought her close so I could whisper. “Yes, thank you. Although, I did figure out where he put the diary. Pretentious arsehole has it on display in his drawing room.”

“Regulus said he’ll cause a distraction, make a speech to his cousin and new cousin-in-law.” I spun her around.

“So Reggie is working with us now?” She stepped on my foot.

“Yes, I asked Snape to speak with him.” We heard the clinking of a knife on a champagne flute and looked up to see Regulus preparing to speak. “We better go make the trade.” I dipped her and gave her a chaste kiss.

Discretely, we made our way to the back of the crowd. Regulus had just begun his speech and we finally made it to the doors leading inside the manor. It took some wandering, but eventually we made it to the drawing room. We hurried over to the glass case and quickly found the black diary. I noticed Hermione starting to breathe faster and her hands shook as she pulled the copy out of her bag. Silently, I opened the glass casing and picked up the horcrux. I could feel the evil practically billowing from it.

“S-Sirius.” Hermione held out the copy and I noticed her pale completion. I knew she was trying to hold it together, but she was coming apart at the seams. I wanted nothing more than to comfort her, but there’s no time. I placed the copy in its place and closed the glass. Hermione took the real diary and dropped it in her bag. We all but ran out of the room.

When we made it back outside, Regulus was no longer speaking, the dancing had resumed, and people were pandering to each other. Just another pureblood gathering. We didn’t stop to talk to anyone, our polyjuice was wearing off, so we swiftly made our way to the apperation point and went back to Hermione’s flat.

With shuddering breaths and pale shaky hands, Hermione reached into her bag and pulled out the largest piece of Voldemort’s soul. She smiled.

Maybe there’s hope after all.


	16. Chapter 16

**HERMIONE**

“Miss Granger,” I watched the man in front of me with disgust. “Do you know why I held you after this meeting?” The same man I looked up to for six years.

“I assure you I do not.” I realized long ago that looking up to someone leaves you with nothing but a sore neck.

“Ah, but I’m sure you remember your little… _agreement_?” His reassuring smile was anything but.

“You mean where you starved me into submission for _the greater good_?” I spat the words out like slime on my tongue.

“So you understand that it was necessary?” My blood boiled. “But alas it seems my precautions were in vain.”

I remained silent.

“It has come to my attention that you have taken it upon yourself to alter our delicate timeline to fit your own wills.”

“Surely you realize the hypocrisy of that statement?” If there was a twinkle in his eyes, it surely would have diminished now. “You, a man claiming his actions for the greater good when it was the greater good for yourself?”

“Do not try to change the subject, why were you at the Malfoy wedding two weeks ago?” He moved closer in front of the chair where I sat, standing up taller.

I chose to glare instead of answer, remaining eye contact. I felt the prickle of invasion in my mind and quickly fortified my existing defenses. My glare intensified.

He sighed and began to pace. “I sent Mr. Lupin on a mission a few months back and noted he favored his right arm. He had never catalogued an injury from a mission that would have caused those careful movements.” He stopped pacing and met my eye once more. “Would you happen to know why that was?”

“Lasting injuries from a full moon?” I said innocently, not even attempting to make him believe me.

He turned away and went to the window. “You are dismissed. Be sure to see Auror Moody for your next mission.”

I stood up and walked to the door. My hand was on the knob when he spoke again.

“Oh, and Miss Granger?” I didn’t look back. “I’ve been in touch with an old colleague of mine, an unspeakable in the Time Room. He says research is coming along faster than they ever expected.”

I could hear the condescending smile in his voice. I left quickly and slammed the door in my wake.

I walked down the hall, floor board creaking from my weight, passing dingy paintings hanging off the walls painted the color of mold. I walked by multiple doors to different room in the cheap inn, many of which leaked questionable moans and the creaking of bed springs. Lovely place to plan the downfall of the Dark Lord. I finally made it to the dank, smoke infested lobby and found Sirius leaning against the wall by the exit, cigarette in one hand, glass of muggle scotch in the other. The sight was almost enough to quell the anger I still felt. Almost.

I walked over to him and took the scotch out of his hand and knocked it back. It burned. It felt great.

“Oi, get your own!” He said taking the glass back.

“Let’s get out of here, I’m sure Lily has some better muggle liquor at our flat.” I said dragging him out the door with me.

“Do you plan on getting pissed?” He said with an eyebrow raised, purposely dragging his feet.

“No,” I gave him a sharp tug and he stumbled into the apperation point. “I plan on _us_ getting pissed.” And I apperated us to the flat.

Sirius landed as gracefully as possible on the floor and I stepped over him and made my way over to the wine rack on the kitchen counter and pulled out a bottle of vodka and two glasses. When I got back to the living room, Sirius was still grumbling about “bloody witches” and “intoxicated side-along” but his mood vastly improved when he saw what was in my hands. Ever the alcoholic, that one. I sat on one end of the couch with my legs crossed facing Sirius. We each took a glass and I filled them.

“What are we toasting, love?” He asked glass poised, ready to knock back.

“Do we need a toast to drink?” I replied with a smirk.

“No, but it makes us feel less guilty the next day.” He laughed

“Here, here!” We threw back one. I scowled at the aftertaste.

“So what did the old wanker want?” Sirius’s thoughts of the headmaster diminished exponentially after the unbreakable vow incident. I threw back my second in an answer. I let the burning sensation fill my senses.

“Ah, I see.” He quickly followed my lead. I poured another.

“He’s on to us. He doesn’t know what we’re up to, but he’s suspicious. He also not so subtly hinted that time turners will be invented soon.” Sirius growled.

“You don’t think he’ll try to send you back, right?” He sounded worried.

“No, love, the vow prevents him from meddling. It was an empty threat, he knows this.” I placated rubbing the pad of my thumb across the back of his hand. We were silent for a bit, watching the motion of my thumb. My eye-lids drooped.

“Enough of this,” Sirius said abruptly. “We should be drinking happy thoughts!” With that we tossed a third. I felt the sting on my throat. I coughed.

“Let’s toast!” He exclaimed pouring another.

“To what?” I laughed.

“Our engagement!” Only when I felt the familiar burn signaling our fourth did I realize what he said.

“Padfoot, I think you’re already drunk. How many did you have at the pub?” I laughed feeling detached from my voice.

“You were talking to Dumbles for a long time.” He slurred pouring another, spilling it in the process.

I started laughing harder, laying down and resting my head in his lap. The motion making me dizzy, causing me to laugh even harder at the feeling. Faintly, I felt a hand brushing through my curls.

“Would marrying me be that bad?” Sirius asked, lip pouting like a four year old. He looked adorable. I pictured Snuffles as a puppy giving me the puppy dog look. I started to laugh some more then thought better of it, Sirius looked put out.

“That was the worst proposal I’ve ever received.” I declared.

“You’re still my fiancé.” Sirius accused, still petting my hair. I sat up.

“But I don’t have a ring.” I said, holding my hand up in front of our faces.

“You don’t need a ring to be my fiancé.” He said eyebrows furrowed.

“But then anyone could be your fiancé.” I said matter-of-factly.

“But I don’t want anyone, I want my Kitten.” He pouted.

“I’m Kitten!” I smiled, then frowned. “But why me, I’m broken. I’m a broken toy.”

“No you’re pretty.” He said running the pad of his thumb across my cheek and over my lip.

“Pretty Vacant.” I smiled again.

“That’s why I love you, you like my music.” He laughed.

“You should listen to Queen. You remind me a lot of Freddie Mercury. You would like them, but he's only got another decade-”

He kissed me, cutting me off mid-sentence. His tongue tasted like vodka. I told him as much. He smiled. We tossed back our fifth. I hardly recognized the burn. He kissed me again, deeper as if he was trying to gauge the alcohol content from my tongue. I started giggling again at the thought. I stopped when my shirt came off. He picked me up and I instinctively wrapped my legs around him. The motion caused my head to spin, but I didn’t care. We made our way to the bedroom leaving articles of clothing in our wake.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

I woke up with an all too familiar pounding in my head. The curtains were drawn at least. I felt a soft body move next to mine and in that moment I didn’t register the pounding in my head or the foul taste in my mouth, it was just the bird sleeping next to me. She let out a sleepy sigh that disturbed the strand of hair on her face. I then decided that getting pissed with your girlfriend is infinitely better than with your mates.

I should say fiancé. I let out a frustrated sigh and pulled my witch closer to my chest. Briefly, I wondered if muggles found a way to make veritaserum and disguised it as alcohol. Ever since James mentioned getting a ring for Lily, I’d been thinking about tying the knot with Hermione. There’s no doubt that she’s it for me. I think I’d always known, since the day we locked eyes, even if I didn’t realize it at the time. But I wonder if she felt the same. She didn’t exactly give a positive or negative response. The girl in question opened her eyes, then squinted. I then resigned to teasing her mercilessly about it until she’s forced to marry me to shut me up.

“Good morning, my lovely fiancé.” I smiled and kissed her cheek.

“Not your fiancé.” She grumbled turning her face into my chest, no doubt trying to go back to sleep.

“Don’t kid yourself, love.”

She groaned.

Just then we heard the floo activate in the living room.

“Hermione! Get your hungover arse up, I have news!” Lily screamed with barely contained excitement.

Hermione and I looked at each other.

“Morning sex?” I asked.

“Morning sex.” She confirmed rolling me over and sitting on top of me.

* * *

An hour later, we walked out into the living room to see a still excited but less than amused Lily sitting on the couch arms crossed.

“Seriously? Did you have to do without the silencing charms?” Lily asked exasperatedly.

“Payback for forcing us to get up.” Hermione said with a smirk.

“Merlin, I can smell the sex from over here, could you not have taken a shower?” She asked, plugging her nose in exaggeration.

“If you say so…” We turned to head toward the bathroom before Lily stopped us again.

“No! I can’t wait another hour.” She said before jumping up and promptly running over to where we stand and shoving her left hand in our faces.

“He proposed at breakfast!”

“That’s wonderful! Congratulations, Lily!” Hermione said, hugging her.

“Hooray! Double wedding!” I grinned. Lily froze.

“What?!” She said snatching Hermione’s hand.

“Don’t listen to him. He was drunk it doesn’t count.”

“Aw, don’t be like that.” I stuck out my lower lip and pouted.

Lily looked back and forth between my puppy dog eyes and Hermione’s glaring ones before laughing. Soon enough we were all laughing uncontrollably, tears leaking from our eyes. The floo activated once again admitting a panicked James. All our smiles died at the look on his face.

“The Prewett Twins never made it back from their mission last night.” James said at our expectant expressions.

Lily started sobbing immediately and James made his way over to comfort her. I felt Hermione stiffen immediately at the news. I was in shock. I remembered their pranks from our earlier years at Hogwarts, they seemed to leave smiles in their wake everywhere they went. I noticed Hermione’s breathing increase rapidly and knew another panic attack was nearing. I put my arm around her shoulders and brought her face to my chest just above my heart while I rubbed soothing circles on the back of her hand and whispered nothings in her ear. Her breathing wasn’t getting any better.

“Hermione, love, breathe with me. Feel my chest? Try to match that, Kitten.” I whispered. Eventually she was able to time her breathing with mine and was able to calm down only to burst into inconsolable tears.

“I couldn’t save them.” She cried. “They still died, and I didn’t do anything.”

“Hey now, it’s not your fault.” James tried.

“No but if I can’t save them, then how am I supposed to save everyone else? Too much could go wrong. I’ve changed too much. I don’t even know what the other fucking horocrux could be.” She continued to cry into my shirt.

“This isn’t just your responsibility…” Lily began.

“You chose to share this with all of us.” James added.

“You can’t have this weight settled on your shoulders all the time, we carry some of that too.” I said.

She looked around resting her gaze on each of our faces before sighing and wiping her tears. “You’re right.” She said at last.

“Hey there we go, now tell us about the last horocrux, maybe we can help.” James said welcoming the distraction, still rubbing comforting circles on his new fiancé’s back.

Hermione sat up and cleared her throat before speaking. “It could either be an item of Ravenclaw’s or Gryffindor’s. It’s not Gryffindor’s sword, and I doubt Riddle would lower himself to using an artifact of Gryffindor’s so I’m led to believe it’s something of Ravenclaw’s.”

We were all thoughtful for a moment. I tried to remember if my own family ever mentioned any such items, but all they ever did was prattle on about Slytherin.

“Maybe a trip to Hogwarts is in order.” Lily said finally.

“I’ve looked through every book in the library on the founders.” Hermione said.

“Maybe so, but maybe something in the Ravenclaw common room could give us a clue.” Lily suggested.

“That’s a good idea, Lils.” She beamed at my praise.

Hermione chewed on her lip. “Term has started back already so we’d have to be careful.”

“Good thing you have two Marauders at your disposal.” James said grinning.

“Maybe by the time we go, Remus will join us as well. Have you heard anything from him?” Lily said turning to me.

“No, if we sent any owls, one of the other werewolves would’ve eaten them.” Everyone grimaced at the mental image.

We were quiet after that, everyone retreating into their own thoughts. Lily and James were off in their own world. Despite the bad news, nothing could bring down their engagement bliss. I looked down at my own witch, whose head was still resting on my chest, and watched as we worried away on her bottom lip. Finally she spoke.

“How’s Molly holding up? They were her brothers.”

James looked up and met her concerned eyes. “She’s a wreck. She’s trying to hold it together for her children, but it’s tough.”

“I wonder if she would like a visit.” Lily hinted.

“Yes, I would love to see the two little boys that’ll take our place in the world of pranks.” I added winking at Lily. Hermione gave a small smile in agreement. We all looked at James.

He pretended to think a moment before answering. “I’m sure she’d welcome the company!”

* * *

**HERMIONE**

I felt a pang in my chest looking at the wonky architecture of the burrow. There was still two more additions to go before it was the grand illusion of structure it was in my time. I didn’t realize it had been two and a half years since I last stepped foot in what I considered my magical home until the moment James knocked on the front door. I caught a glimpse of a gnome peeking out of a bush on the side of the house. Molly opened the door, wand pointed between James’s eyes.

“The last time I visited your mother for tea, what did you get in trouble for?” She asked, a hard gleam in her eye that dared anyone to cross her.

She looked younger than the last time I saw her, obviously, however, she looks less like the war-hardened, worried mother I knew her as. Despite the obvious signs of fresh grief, she still had that maternal glow. She had less worry lines and more laugh lines. She was also less plump and her hair was a more striking orange than the dull sunset I was acquainted with. It heavily reminded me of Ginny’s hair. I saw a two small red heads peeking from behind her skirt.

James hesitated with obvious embarrassment a moment before answering. “Mum scolded me for trying to send Lily one of the family bracelets from our vault as an engagement.”

“It was just any bracelet,” Sirius said through his laughter. “It was the oldest, most expensive one!”

“I was fourteen!” James said turning around to glare at his mate. It would have worked if he wasn’t so flushed. I looked at Lily who was also blushing but shaking with silent laughter just the same.

“Merlin, there’s no way you could be death eaters! You can’t fake that kind of banter!” Molly said with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “It’s good to see you boys again.” She added, giving them each one of her famous Molly Weasley hugs. “Come in, come in, you can introduce me to these lovely girls in the living room.”

As we made our way through the comfortable home I noticed the family clock with all the spoons pointing ‘Home’. I tried not to notice the two on the table below the clock. I took to staring at the family photos on the walls instead.

“Well, Mrs. Weasley-“

“Molly, dear, please we’ve known each other for years.” Molly interrupted James.

“Right well, _Molly_ ,” She smiled. “This is my fiancé, Lily Evans.” He presented with an arm respectably around her shoulder.

“Oh, I take it she accepted the bracelet then.” Molly teased pulling a startled Lily into a bone crushing hug. Everyone laughed.

“Just a ring, actually.” She managed. Molly immediately took her left hand gently in hers to examine.

“Lovely, dear.” She beamed at James who smiled sheepishly in return, a pink tinge on his cheeks.

Sirius cleared his throat. “This is my _fiancé_ , Hermione Granger.” Sirius winked at me. James looked affronted. Molly squealed.

“Oh lovely, two weddings!” She pulled me into a hug. Engagement momentarily forgotten, I lost myself in the familiar comfort. She smelled the same, like rain and cooking spices. Merlin, how I missed her.

“We’re not actually engaged.” I said hitting Sirius across the arm to curb his laughter. Lily’s shoulders were still shaking, James still looked a little put out but cracked a smile anyway. Molly just looked confused.

“He was drunk.” I explained.

“You still said yes.” He smiled.

“I don’t even have a ring.” I turned to him arms crossed.

“Details, details.” He waved off, still smiling.

I was about to hex his smile of his face when Molly clapped her hands.

“Oh Sirius, you always were one for playing with fire, weren’t you?” She laughed. “Never let her go, dear.”

“Never.” Sirius confirmed with a fond smile at me which I returned.

All of a sudden my vision was red and there was a weight in my lap. The weight was tipping so I quickly put my arms around to steady.

“I like fire. Dragons breathe fire. Are you a dragon?” The small boy asked with childlike curiosity in his brilliant blue eyes.

“Charlie! We do not climb on guests!” Molly scolded.

“Sorry to disappoint, but no, I’m not a dragon.” I said with a small smile.

“Oh, well that’s okay, I have a dragon right here, see?” He held up a small, black stuffed dragon with red horns along its spine.

“Oh it’s lovely what’s its name?” I feigned curiosity.

“ _His_ name is Drogon. ‘Cause it sounds like Dragon. But it’s not.” He explained in a way only kids can.

“He’s lovely.” I smiled. I looked around the room and saw Lily standing holding a toddler looking mildly terrified, James was in a heated conversation with who I assume to be Bill, Molly was looking at all three of her children looking torn between intercepting or leaving them be, and Sirius was looking at me with pure adoration in his eyes.

“I’m hungry!” Charlie exclaimed suddenly.

“Oh dear, is it that time already?” Molly asked rhetorically. “You simply must stay for lunch, you all look much too thin.” She bustled into the kitchen. I picked Charlie up by his underarms and deposited him in the lap of Sirius, who was adamantly shaking his head ‘no’ and a terrified look on his face.

“You’ll do fine. Talk to him about his dragon.” I whispered in his ear as I walked past.

“She’s very, er, cute?” I over heard him say.

“IT’S A BOY!” Charlie exclaimed glaring at Sirius who looked horrified. I giggled from my vantage point in the kitchen doorway.

“He can fight the worst death eaters out there, but give him a six year old and he’s petrified.” I jumped about a foot in the air. I didn’t notice Molly standing next to me observing the scene as well, mixing something in a bowl.

“Mrs. Weasley!”

“Molly, please, I insist.” She said turning back to the kitchen.

“Molly,” I paused. “Would you like some help with lunch?”

She looked skeptical for a moment, considering. “Well, I suppose. Full house today. Could you get me the eggs from the basket behind you? Thank you, dear.” She handed me the recipe for her mince pies and I got to work. She gave me a weird look when I pulled items out like I’d lived there for years, but she didn’t question it.

“Where did you learn to cook?” She asked once I’d put the pies in the oven.

“My mum taught me, she’d let me help with holiday cooking when I came back for break.” I said thinking of those few years I was actually spending Christmas at home. I felt a pang of longing but quickly shut it down. At her questioning look I clarified. “I’m muggleborn.”

“Oh, these times can’t be easy for you.” She sympathized, or tried to. Blood traitor to mudblood.

“Yeah.” I unconsciously rubbed my left arm and pulled my sleeve further down. She caught the movement, but didn’t question it. Her expression grew suspicious, expecting a different kind of scar in place.

“So what does Sirius’s family think of your relationship?” She baited. This was not how I wanted our conversation to go.

“If Sirius’s family hadn’t already disowned him, at this news, they’d kill him.” My voice hardened at the end. Neither of us were comfortable discussing Sirius’s extended family or their alliance. We lapsed into tense silence. I could hear the childlike laughter coming from the living room. The timer on the oven beeped. Neither of us moved.

“Smells wonderful in here, as always.” Arthur came in with two bundles in his arms. He leaned down to peck Molly on the cheek. “What are you cooking?”

This broke us out of our stupor. Molly pulled the pies out of the oven and placed them on the table and called everyone in for lunch. Introductions were made once again for Arthur’s sake and we all tucked in to our meal. Sirius, who was sitting on my left, gave me a curious glance noticing my discomfort. I shook my head and he grabbed my hand that was sitting on the table and squeezed rubbing his thumb in comforting circles across the back of my hand. Molly also caught this action and took to staring at my forearm, as if she could see through my sleeve.

I was waiting for something. “Sirius, I didn’t think you the type to run with death eaters, and I don’t appreciate you bringing them into my home.” Molly said curtly.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Molly.” He tried to laugh thinking it was a joke.

“Of course not, she hides it so well.”

I took my hand back from Sirius and put it in my lap out of her sight and rubbed my arm. The damn scar seeming to prickle with the attention it was receiving today.

“Your mark burning, dear? Better run to your master.” She pursed her lips. The room was silent except the gurgling the toddlers were making. Even Bill and Charlie could grasp the tension in the room. Molly looked like she was barely containing her anger, Arthur looked confused, Lily was looking furious, James was looking green, and Sirius was looking at me with concern written in his features. I looked down at my lap.

“Molly, I’m not a death eater. I don’t have a mark-“

“Really? So what are you hiding? My brothers were just murdered, if you think I’m going to have a meal with one of them you’re out of your mind!” Her voice crescendoed steadily into hysterics. She had tears streaming down her face. My own heart broke for her grief.

Cautiously, I lifted my arm up and rolled up the sleeve of my navy blue jumper. I stared resolutely at the fork I left on the table, a small bit of meat still on one of the tines. I tried to block out the gasp and the apology. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was screaming and she was laughing. Only when I felt a hand grasp mine and another roll my jumper back down did I look up. I met Sirius’s swirling silver orbs and fell in love over again. He squeezed my hand and I cracked a smile. I met the varying gazes of the rest at the table.

“Did you get those from a dragon?” Charlie asked innocently.

“More like a dragon lady.” I said. Sirius snorted.

That broke the tension in the room. The rest of lunch was filled with laughs. Lily explained to Arthur how to work a record player. Fred and George made a mess. Bill held conversation with anyone who would listen. Sirius and James told stories of their school days. Molly’s smiles finally met her eyes.

After lunch she pulled my into another hug that was more suffocating than the last and continued to apologize profusely. I brushed her off saying that I understood she was looking out for her family and with emotions running high after her loss, I didn’t blame her.

At this, she took the defensive once more. “What do you know of grief?”

I pointed to the living room where Sirius was complaining about his pink, glittery hair and James was trying to give the twins high fives while Lily was laughing on the couch exclaiming ‘she was right’.

“They’re the only family I’ve got left.” Molly looked at me then and my hardened, caramel met her grief ridded brown ones and we finally had an understanding. That was when Molly Weasley added me to her family once again.

It felt good to be home.


	17. Chapter 17

**SIRIUS**

“I am the strawberry this time.” Lily declared through a yawn as she sat down at the breakfast table. Hermione invited us over for breakfast to plan our unwelcome Hogwarts visit.

“But, love, you’re already the blueberry.” James said gently.

“I didn’t get to be the strawberry last time, so I better be it this time or we’ll have a repeat of defense class, fourth year.” Lily was finally starting to wake up. James looked terrified and quickly switched the blueberry out for a chunk of strawberry.

“Don’t try to argue with her before she has her coffee.” Hermione laughed placing another thing called a waffle on the plate in front of us and sitting down. “I learned that the hard way.”

We all tucked into breakfast and hostile moods evaporated replaced with stuffed contentedness. James began construction on a waffle castle and Hermione went to get her notes on the horocruxes while Lily and I cleaned up. It wasn’t expected of a Black heir to know household charms so I was glad when Lily cast them perfectly. She always had an affinity for charms.

“Congratulations, Lily-flower, I don’t think I ever got the chance to tell you.” I pulled her into a hug.

“I always hated that name.” She said over my shoulder. I could hear the smile in her voice. “I know that Hermione said we end up together, but that knowledge doesn’t beat the real thing.”

“She’s always been careful to let it be your choice rather than what’s expected from her timeline.”

Lily hummed in agreement as she reached up to smooth down my bed hair.

“Now what we need is for you two to make _your_ engagement official.” She smiled at her handiwork then looked me in the eyes. “Are you serious about what you said?” She put her hands on her hips, ready to give me a tongue lashing if I gave the wrong response.

To answer her, I reached a hand into my front right pocket of my jeans and pulled out a ring.

“Oh, it’s beautiful!” She gasped. It was a simple ring with a white gold band and two rubies on either side of a princess cut diamond. James would give me hell for being so soft, but I like to think the two rubies are Hermione and I as we are Gryffindors.

“It was one of the pieces I inherited from my Uncle Alphard. It’s probably the only piece the Black Family owned that had rubies instead of emeralds.”

“She’ll absolutely love it.” She smiled.

“Who will love what?” Hermione asked coming into the kitchen. I hastily put the ring back in my pocket and turned to her with an innocent smile on my face.

“Oh! I was just telling Sirius that you would love that I was teaching him household spells.” Lily stated with a question.

“Right.” She looked between us, not believing it for a second. “Well, James has finished his breakfast masterpiece so if you’ll join us, we can plan.” She walked toward the dining area once more. Lily and I shared a relieved look and followed her.

When Remus arrived, the scene was utter chaos. I blamed it on James’s brilliant idea to use syrup as the Great Lake, but either way, most of the castle ended up stuck in James’s hair, Lily had chocolate syrup and strawberry seeds all over her face, Hermione’s hair seemed to be a black hole that decided to attract everything, and I was relatively clean but still throwing bits of fruit at everyone.

“What. The. _Hell_.” Remus has been here for thirty seconds and already has a smudge of chocolate on his face.

“I thought we were supposed to be planning how we get into Hogwarts.” That could also just be Remus. The wolf does love chocolate.

“Moony, mate, glad you could join us.” I said throwing a blueberry at him. He caught it in his mouth, the prat.

“We decided to go while everyone is at dinner. There’s a secret passage way that’s close to the Ravenclaw common room that was collapsed in my time.” Hermione said as syrup dripped a steady stream from one of her curly locks.

Remus stared for a moment in disbelief. “Then how did this happen?” He gestured to all of us.

“James.” We all said together. Remus nodded his head accepting the explanation.

“Well, I’m going to shower and try to get this shit out of my hair.” Hermione said standing up.

“Want any help?” I called cheekily.

“Yes, actually.” She called over her shoulder. I wasn’t expecting that. I got up and quickly followed her into the bathroom leaving a mixture of disgusted and amused faces behind.

* * *

“James, get your hand off my ass.” I said for the third time. The passage way was pitch dark, the only sounds were our foot falls on the cobbled stone beneath our feet.

“My hand isn’t on your ass, it’s only Lily’s ass.”

“James, get your hand off my ass.”

“Yes, dear.”

“Whi-ipped.” Remus sing-songed.

“Moony, you’re just jealous because no one’s hand is on your ass.” James said. You didn’t need any lighting to know his cheeks were turning pink.

“Actually, someone’s hand is on my ass.”

“Shit, I thought that was ‘Mione’s.” I quickly moved my hand. Everyone laughed. The hand on my ass still hadn’t moved so I tugged on the arm it belongs too and chuckled at the feminine squeak it caused. I put my arm around Hermione and put my own hand in her back pocket.

“Found the door.” Remus said as he pushed. Dust fell from the ceiling as he opened it. We all coughed and stepped out into the corridor, squinting at the bright light.

“The Ravenclaw dorms should be this way. Ah, here we are.” James said stopping in front of a door with an enchanted knocker. Lily reached up and knocked.

“What is life’s greatest illusion?” The door asked. We all thought for a moment.

“The one where you saw a lady in half.” I said thinking of the “magician” Lily showed us on the veletision. Everyone laughed. The door didn’t open.

“I’ve got it. Being happily married.” James answered earning a slap from Lily. The door didn’t open.

“Dreams are reality and reality is really a dream?” Remus asked.

“That’s deep, Moony.” He blushed under my compliment. The door still didn’t open.

Hermione, who had been silent in contemplation this entire time, stepped forward with her shoulders back and answered, “Innocence.”

The door opened.

The Ravenclaw common room was as blue as the Gryffindor’s was red. The only startling difference was the giant statue of Rowena Ravenclaw in the center. We all got to work looking around the common room for clues. Hermione and Lily looked through the bookshelves, Remus took to studying the statue, and James and I looked along the walls and portraits.

“This statue looks familiar…” Remus said aloud.

“Well it is Rowena Ravenclaw-“ James started but was cut off by Remus.

“No, doesn’t she look like that ghost we tried to give chocolate to in first year?” Hermione and Lily looked up from their books at this.

“Merlin, you remember that? That was eight years ago, mate.” James said scratching his head.

“And you don’t? She was such a pretty bird for a ghost.” I reminisced.

“Do you think we could find her? If she looks like Rowena, she might be a relative. She might have some answers.” Hermione put her book back on the shelf and walked over to Remus.

“We might. When we found her, we were pranking Ravenclaw tower, so she might be around.” He said.

We left the Ravenclaw common room and started walking the corridors of the tower to find this ghost. Many flights of stairs and unused classrooms later, we were just about to give up when we saw the faint wisp of a translucent dress float around the corner in front of us. We took off running to try and catch her. She floated there, looking out one of the giant windows overlooking the grounds.

“We’ve been looking for you.” Lily started.

“I know.” The ghost said.

“Then why avoid us?” James asked, panting.

“Because I know what you seek.” She still wouldn’t look at us.

“Oh good. That makes things simple.” I said.

She turned to us then. She looked at all of our faces before turning around and floating away.

“Wait!” Hermione called. She stopped. “You’re related to Rowena Ravenclaw. Aren’t you?”

“I am her daughter, Helena.”

“The Grey Lady.” Lily whispered.

“I do not go by that name!” She turned to flee again.

“We’re sorry! Wait!” Remus called.

She did not turn. “You seek my mother’s diadem.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yes, that’s right.” James said slowly as if approaching a feral animal.

“I cannot help you.” She fled. We chased her.

“Wait, please! We want to destroy it!” James pleaded. She stopped.

“That’s what you want too, isn’t it, Helena? You want it destroyed?” Hermione tried.

She turned around. “Another swore to destroy it many years ago. A strange boy with a strange name.”

“Tom Riddle.” Hermione whispered.

“But he lied.” She was backing away now.

“He lied to many people.” Hermione said.

She approached us quickly startling us with the ire in which she spoke. “I know who he is! I know what he’s done! He defiled it! With dark magic!” She floated slowly down the corridor and paused with her back to us.

“We can destroy it once and for all. But only if you tell us where he hid it. You do know where he hid it, don’t you, Helena? You just have to tell us. Please.” I pleaded.

She turned and floated around me. “Strange…” I felt the chill from where she lightly brushed my shoulder. “You remind me of him a bit.” I didn’t want to contemplate her reasoning.

“It’s here.” She was backing away now. “In the castle.” She looked at all of our faces. “In the place where everything is hidden.” I saw Hermione stiffen. “If you have to ask, you’ll never know.” She was looking at me now. “If you know, you need only ask.”

“Thank you.” Remus said. She floated further down the hall before coming to a stop in front of another window. Hermione started walking and didn’t wait for us to catch up.

“You know where she was talking about, don’t you?” I said as I fell in step with her quick pace.

“Yes.” That was the only answer she gave. She didn’t falter. She took us up staircase after staircase until we reached the seventh floor. She paced in front of the wall, what she was asking for I didn’t know.

She opened the door and we followed her inside. We were met with piles and piles of what seemed to be useless junk, but upon closer inspection, some of it was worth looking at. Old enchanted items, past student’s text books, bewitched jewelry, goblin made weapons, foreboding statues. We followed Hermione aimlessly through the stacks.

“What is this place?” Lily breathed in wonder.

“It’s the Room of Hidden Things.” Hermione stopped in front of what looked to be an old armoire. “It’s where Draco Malfoy repaired the vanishing cabinet and let the death eaters into the castle.” She turned away and picked up her pace in a new direction.

“Maybe we should spread out and look for it.” Remus suggested.

“Good idea, mate. Send up red sparks if you’re in trouble and green if you find it.” James said before taking off between two stacks. Everyone was quick to do the same.

I started down my own path and took stock of the fascinating objects around me. I paused at a table and glanced over the ornate gems and trinkets. My gaze settled on a small cylindrical object filled with amber liquid. What caught my eye was the hourglass in the center. The chain was broken and the outer glass was cracked slightly. There’s no telling where, or when, this oblong timeturner came from, and I didn’t want to waste time trying to find out. Part of me wondered if Hermione could fix it, and if she did, would she fix it so she could go back to her time? I continued on.

Passing a huge stack of classroom chairs, I came across a sparkling silver harp. It had inscriptions on the side in French.

_Celui qui aime vraiment le joueur sera le seul public._

My mother tried to force my brother and me to learn French, but in an act of rebellion, I never learned. Curious, I strummed my fingers along the chords. I couldn’t hear any sound coming from the instrument. I strummed again and still nothing. I heard a noise to my left behind me and quickly turned wand out, noiseless harp forgotten. When Hermione came out from behind a stack, I chuckled at my own paranoia. I stopped smiling when she made a gurgling noise in her throat. Blood started to trickle from the corner of her mouth, she collapsed. I rushed forward and pulled her into my arms, blood was practically pouring from her nose and mouth. She continued to make strangled, wet choking sounds. She was already cold. Her eyes met mine. The noises stopped. The blood on her face was diluted pink from mixing with my tears.

“Sirius?”

I turned and looked at the brunette behind me. No blood, no choking. Alive and standing. I looked back at the girl in my arms. I pulled out my wand.

“Riddikulus.” She disappeared. I stood up slowly and felt a hand on my shoulder. I pulled her to my chest and buried my face in her curls. I let her calm me and took relief in holding her, alive and well.

“I heard music and thought I come and see what it was about.”

“Music?” I pulled away and looked at her face.

“Didn’t you hear it? It was the most beautiful sounding strings.”

“I found a harp, but I didn’t hear the music when I played it.”

She looked thoughtful for a second before asking me to show it to her. She walked around it and ran her hand over the engravings before blushing slightly. Now, I was curious. She looked at me for a moment and back to the harp, chewing on her lower lip as she did so. She reached out a hand and lightly strummed along the strings. Almost immediately I heard the wonderful chords she must have been talking about. I smiled at the beautiful sound.

“Is this the music you were talking about?” I asked her. She gave me really wide smile before nodding.

She cleared her throat. “I used to vacation in France a lot, so I picked up the language.”

“So you know what the engravings say?” She nodded.

“They say, ‘Whoever truly loves the player will be the only audience.’”

I let the words wash over me a moment before smiling and stepping around the harp and placing my hands on either side of her neck just below her jaw, thumbs brushing her cheeks and fingers caressing the nape of her neck. I leaned in and placed a slow, sweet kiss on her lips. I rested my forehead against hers. There was no question, she wouldn’t return to her time given a chance. She was mine, for this moment and forever.

We both jumped when we heard green fireworks going off and quickly made our way through the stacks over to them. When we got there, it took everything we had not to burst out laughing. James was holding the diadem, but he was also ten feet in the air hanging upside down from the arm of a statue.

Only two more left to get.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

We collapsed on the couch laughing in exhaustion from the day’s events. The way out of the castle was much harder than the way in. Apparently, we stayed a lot longer in the Room of Hidden Things than we thought. Dinner was far over and there was a student or professor around every corner. Lily got up from her spot in James’s lap to make some tea. Remus was in a dead sleep in the armchair by the fireplace. James and Sirius were whispering conspiratorially. I was nodding off with my head in the crook of Sirius’s neck. I was just about to succumb to sleep when there was a pop and a house elf was in front of me. I heard Sirius growl and that shook me out of my groggy state.

“M-Master R-Regulus sent me to fetch t-the m-mudblood.” Kreacher stuttered. I shot up from my seat and grabbed my beaded bag and made sure my wand was in its holster. I held onto Kreacher’s arm.

“Sirius, let’s go.” He looked skeptical at house elf for a moment before reaching for his other arm. Before any of the others had a chance to protest or come with, we disapperated.

My face immediately curled into a disgusted scowl at the deatheater propaganda that adorned the walls. Then I noticed a panicked Regulus pacing back and forth across the expanse of his room. This boy was too young to have such harsh worry lines marring his features and dark circles under his eyes. And definitely too young to have creaking joints and nerve damage from prolonged exposure to the Cruciatus. But then again, wasn’t I his age? Aren’t I too young? I feel I’ve lived a lifetime in my short existence.

“Reggie?” He stopped pacing.

“You got him to come along too?” The silver in his eyes was nothing like Sirius’s calm storm, Regulus’s was hardened steel. And hard steel bore into hard caramel.

“Back up is a good thing, Reg.” Sirius raised an eyebrow at the familiarity.

Regulus sighed. “It’s good to see you, brother.” He said to his feet.

Sirius strode over in two steps and engulfed his little brother in a hug.

“I’m so sorry, Regulus.” He choked.

Regulus flinched out of the embraced. “What do you mean?”

“I left you.”

Regulus’s shoulders visibly slumped. “You had to, she would’ve killed you if you stayed.”

“They could’ve killed you too. You would have… If Hermione had never…” Sirius ran his fingers through his hair.

“I’m not brave like you, Siri. I was content to play my part.” Regulus placed a hand on his brother’s shoulder.

“I should’ve been there to protect you.”

“You’re here now.”

It was the first time I’d seen Regulus truly smile. No smirk, no fake grin. And Sirius returned the expression with vigor.

“As touching as this is, boys,” I interjected. Both boys seemed to have forgotten I was there. “We have a horocrux to collect and a fake death to pull off.”

* * *

Kreacher apperated us individually to the island at the center of the inferi infested lake. I remembered Harry’s explanation of the hidden blood magic and the boat and was never more thankful for underestimated elf magic. We approached the basin at the center of the small island and sure enough, the locket was sitting at the bottom. I picked up the shell.

“I’ll drink it.”

“Like hell you are!” Sirius looked at me with fire in his eyes.

“I know what to expect from this. You two can get us out of here, I’m sure.”

Sirius didn’t look convinced.

“It’ll be fine. Just make sure I keep drinking.” I forced the shell into his hands.

He filled the shell and with a guilty look held it for me to drink. It burned like vodka and fire, the moisture in my mouth seemed to evaporate. I was hardly aware that another shell full was at my lips. I choked. I heard Kreacher whimper in sympathy. I felt cold. Like I’d never be happy again. Like a dementor was stalking nearby. I felt the shell touch my lips and drank.

_Let’s have a little chat! Girl to girl!_

I needed water. My limbs felt like lead. I drank the next shell greedily only to gag on fire.

_Reckon she’ll let me have at bit of the girl once she’s finished with her?_

“No… more...” I felt tears slide down my face. I drank the potion and choked on the burn.

_Want to know why I listen to that radio every night?_

“Water.” I rasped. I felt something wet against my lips.

_You’re just a filthy little mudblood._

The cold was seeping into my bones and freezing them. I couldn’t get my muscles to work. I gagged as I swallowed the fiery liquid.

_I killed Sirius Black._

I felt my body moving before I comprehended what was happening. I wanted to fight it off, but I felt so weak. I felt a tugging in my abdomen and almost vomited at the feeling. I felt myself being lowered onto a soft surface. Vaguely I caught someone mentioning something about ‘getting her water’. I was so thirsty. I felt something touch my lips and instinctively shied away.

“No, love, its water.” I wanted to believe him.

“Please, Kitten, drink the water.” I sipped the water carefully, expecting it to burn. When it didn’t I drank more. Almost instantly I felt better. I was helped into a sitting position.

“Sirius?” I still felt weak. His arms wrapped around me and I moved my trembling arms to embrace him. I looked around at the concerned stares of everyone in the room.

“Where’s Regulus?” I asked to take the attention off me.

“Charming the Family Tapestry to appear as though he died.” Sirius said into my shoulder. I nodded.

I heard a pop of apperation and looked over to find Kreacher and a weary looking Regulus. The entire room was silent. The tension in the air was palpable.

“So, mate,” James began with a serious expression. “What’s the afterlife like?”

Everyone broke into laughter at the light attempt to break the discomfort.

“So we got the locket?” I asked once everyone had calmed down.

Regulus smirked and pulled it out of his pocket. I involuntarily shivered. Sirius gave me a questioning glance.

“I had to wear it. Harry, Ron and I would take turns. It whispers things, plants thoughts in your head. Tom Riddle’s voice.” He held me tighter as if trying to squeeze all my bad experiences out of me.

“Well, that’s a bit fucked.” Regulus said looking at the object with disgust. “If that’s what the locket can do, I don’t even want to know what the potion did to you.”

“What potion?” Remus asked.

“One of the defenses for the locket was to drink Emerald Potion.” I said in a monotonous voice.

“Makes you physically weak, extremely thirsty, and you revisit the worst moments in your life.” Lily gasped.

Everyone paled. I was glad I didn’t tell them what the potion really was or they’d never have let me drink it.

“You guys didn’t have to fight the inferi did you?” I looked back and forth from Sirius to Regulus.

“No, we were lucky. You were crawling toward the lake, but we got Kreacher to get you out before you touched it.” I nodded.

After the explanation of our impromptu horcrux gathering, everyone was truly feeling the exhaustion of the day. Remus flooed home. James carried a sleeping Lily to her bed before flooing with Regulus to his flat. Sirius still had yet to let up on physical contact. We were both falling asleep sitting up though.

“Sirius?” I mumbled.

“Hmm?” He didn’t open his eyes.

“Take us to bed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, congratulations and thank you for making it this far!
> 
> I will be stopping here for today, but I will post one chapter a day until Christmas (hopefully I did math correctly and the story will be fully posted on Christmas day.)
> 
> Just reminding you guys that this story is complete, and if you're impatient, it is posted on ff.net under the same name.
> 
> Hope you guys are having a nice day! (Or night!)


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Slight bit of dub-con/non-con. I have bolded the first and last parts if you want to skip it.
> 
> It's kind of cringey so I would skip it if I were you haha.

**SIRIUS**

“Sing us a song you’re the piano man!” James shouted from his position on top of the coffee table, firewhiskey spilling over the side of his glass.

“Lily, why’d you have to show him muggle music?” Remus turned to Lily almost tipping over in the process given his inebriated state.

“Sing us a song tonight!” James continued his off-key lyrical slurring.

“I regret that decision every time he drinks. James, get off my coffee table!”

“Well, we’re all in the mood for a melody!” James turned toward Lily’s voice and promptly fell off and onto the floor.

“Thank you, darling.” Lily started giggling like mad, clearly not as sober as she wants us to believe.

“And you’ve got us feeling alright…” James trailed off, voice muffled by the carpeted floor.

The months had flown by. James and I seemed to never catch a break between auror missions and order missions. No one else seemed to fare any better. Lily had been studying tortuously for her healer training. Hermione had decided to wait before joining the ministry, there was too much corruption and she hoped to come in after the war and clean up the department and evaluate outdated laws and regulations. In the meantime, she continued to experiment with the Wolfsbane Potion in hopes of improving the effects. She had been beating herself up lately because she couldn’t effective control fiendfyre and she feared we had to fight the basilisk anyway. She was at her wits end about finding an efficient way to break in to Gringotts. She’s had many mental breakdowns and I’d been there for every one of them. No one should have to take this burden on their own. Every death was like a personal failure to her. I admired her strength, any other person would have crumbled under the weight of the stress, but not my witch. My witch. I haven’t yet found the right time to actually propose despite my constant barrage of calling her my fiancé. I know I need to do that soon.

November had rolled around bringing with it the chill that promises winter. Tonight, we were celebrating James and Lily’s elopement. They didn’t want a huge wedding to begin with so not to draw unwanted attention. They also only truly cared about close friends knowing. With them no longer having living parents and Lily’s horrid sister, they just eloped. We all met at the house James had bought for Lily in Godric’s Hollow. Neither Hermione nor I felt like living alone one our respective flat mates had left so we moved in to one flat together. So here we were celebrating. Or getting shitfaced, whichever.

Hermione turned her head to look at me from her place on the love seat on my left. “Bill, I believe this is killing me” She slurred more than sang, her unfocused eyes swirled with amusement.

“As the smile ran away from his face.” Remus supplied from where he lay on top of James on the floor.

I pulled Hermione up with me into my arms and began a staggering waltz around the living room as I sang. “Well, I’m sure that I could be a movie star, if I could get out of this place.” She smiled brilliantly, tripping over our feet.

“La la la di da da” Lily carried on through her giggles.

We all heard the floo activate and turned to look at who decided to pop in. Regulus stepped through, brushing soot off his robes as he took in the states of the people in his sights. A smirk for Lily’s giggling, raised eyebrows for James and Remus’s tangle of limbs on the floor, and soft eyes for Hermione and I dancing about the room.

“Why am I not surprised that you’re all drunk?” He asked no one.

“I’m not!” Lily proclaimed, proudly.

“Yes, you are, love.” James told the carpet.

“James, you’re alive?” Remus look thoroughly confused as to why his bed was talking.

“No, darling. I’m not allowed to drink.” She said with a coy smile.

By now Hermione and I had slowed to a relaxed sway, but at this Hermione stiffened, her inebriated brain not betraying her ability to think.

“Who says? Grab a glass and catch up!” James said not paying any attention to Remus who was poking his messy hair.

“I don’t think Harry would like that.” She smiled.

Hermione gasped and covered her mouth, tears pooling in her wide eyes. James shot up into a standing position sending Remus sprawling to the floor as he made his way over to his wife.

“Are you sure?” He asked. She nodded. Hermione sobbed. I pulled her into my embrace and kissed her hairline. I knew how this information could affect her.

“Who’s Harry?” Regulus asked genuinely confused. Hermione gave a watery laughed and walked over to Lily and James and gave them each a hug. I walked over to my brother and put a hand on his shoulder.

“That’s my soon-to-be godson. Current residence in Lily’s stomach.” He looked sharply at the couple eyes wide. He offered his congratulations.

The group had warmed up to Regulus’s presence over the past months. To keep from going bored from being kept home all the time, he usually assisted Hermione in her research. He had the opportunity to live with Hermione and I, but decided to live with Remus instead because “at least he’s smart enough to put silencing charms on his room.” Hermione’s cheeks colored an endearing shade of red at that.

James was busy alternating between cuddling Lily and talking to her flat stomach. I was sitting with my arms around the witch in my lap who was smiling wide at her best friend’s parents. Remus was still on the floor, but was now glaring at the two couples. A drunk Moony was always a cuddly Moony and he had no one to cuddle tonight. Regulus poured himself a glass and walked over and filled up Remus’s glass.

“Yes, they’re sharing a drink they call loneliness, but it’s better than drinking alone!” Regulus sang as he clinked glasses with Remus. We all laughed. Maybe if my pureblood brother can sing muggle music and live with a werewolf, then just maybe there’s hope for a better future.

**HERMIONE**

The stress of the situation was slowly killing me. As 1979 wraps up, my panic only increased. Less than two years from the original date of Lord Voldemort’s defeat, and we were still out one horcrux and a way to destroy the others. Christmas came and went, but I couldn’t feel the usual holiday cheer. People were dying and I felt useless. Sirius helped when he could, and Regulus was a great research partner, but the weight was pressing down on my shoulders. Who knew the weight of the world was so heavy?

In an attempt to keep my mind sane, I took to meditation. I did this a lot on the run with Harry and Ron. When the locket was exhausting, when we reached every dead end, when Ron left. I’d strengthen my occlumecy shields, compartmentalize, create my mindscape, from time to time, I’d visit my animagus form. Until this past summer, I hadn’t had the resources to continue with my transformation. It was hard to keep it a secret from two people who’d completed theirs, especially during the month with the mandrake leaf. I’d been trying to transform completely for two months becoming increasingly successful every time.

Today was the day, I could feel it. Sirius and James were at work, Regulus was in the library, Remus was at home relaxing in preparation for a moon, and Lily was pouring over medical textbooks. I walked to the room I shared with Sirius and closed the door putting up locking and silencing charms. My magic was singing in anticipation and excitement. I stood at the foot of the bed in front of the full length mirror and held my arms out, palms up. I slowly closed my eyes and breathed deep concentrating on transforming every aspect of my body into that of my animal. I felt my body moving, elongating, shrinking, growing.

When I opened my eyes, I flicked my tail in triumph. My sense of smell was heightened, my vision sharper and more intoned to the darkness of the room. My caramel brown human eyes oddly fit with the body of a panther. Sirius will never let me live it down that my animagus is a type of cat. Closing my eyes once more, I focused on returning to human form.

I left the room and grabbed my bag making sure my wand holster was in place. After writing a note saying where I’m going, I disapperated to Diagon Alley and made my way to Knockturn Alley. The Wolfsbane Potion was already made with some of the more darker ingredients so it makes sense that I could improve the effects with other darker ingredients. Knockturn Alley is sure to have some that I could experiment with.

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and I knew I was being followed. Discretely, so not to arise suspicion, I crossed the street and changed direction in seemingly random patterns hoping my pursuer would lose me. I made it to the apothecary and swiftly skirted around shelves and tried to make it to where the ingredients I needed were. As I was rounding a corner, the sleeve of my jumper caught on a vial and sent it crashing to the ground. I heard footsteps fast approaching so I walked briskly to the exit, abandoning my shopping trip. I made it through the door when a silent spell hit me and my world went black. So much for constant vigilance.

**SIRIUS**

There’s and old muggle idea that whatever you’re doing the minute the new year begins is what you’ll spend the rest of the year doing. At midnight that night, I was running from Death Eaters and searching for Hermione. Needless to say, I don’t like that particular muggle saying. It had been weeks since Hermione’s capture and we were no closer to getting her back than we were when we lost her.

I still remember that night. James and I had been working late trying to close a case and I couldn’t wait to get home. I arrived through the floo to see a panicked Regulus, hysterical Lily, and a somber Snape. I could never get used to seeing Snape in my home despite his many information updates. James followed through the floo and immediately went to calm his wife. Snape explained that Hermione was captured. The air rushed out of my lungs and I felt Regulus place his hand on my shoulder. Looking around at the flat I shared with Hermione and all the things laying around, books with dog-eared pages, notebooks open with scribbles only she could decipher, empty inkwells long since dried out, and the occasional empty teacup, I realized that home is only wherever Hermione is. And she wasn’t here.

It’d been almost a month since that night. Everyone felt her absence, not even Snape was unaffected. He came around almost daily to give updates. He hardly had any news, but when he did, it wasn’t good. The Order wasn’t hardly phased, this kind of thing seemed commonplace at this point in the war. Dumbledore didn’t bat an eyelash at the news. This infuriated me, no one was willing to get her back. We’d been searching relentlessly with the help of what little information Snape could give, but it was fruitless. We couldn’t give up.

“Lily, love, she’s strong. She’ll get through this, and we’ll help her. We’ll get her back.” James was once again controlling a hormonal Lily.

“B-but sh-she’s been through s-so much. Sh-she doesn’t deserve this.” Lily sobbed into his shirt.

Lily seemed to break down every other day. I couldn’t take it much more. I was about to leave and go to Hermione’s library when the floo activated and a greasy bat stepped out. Despite his updates, we couldn’t let bygones be bygones. Apparently, trying to show him a werewolf was unforgivable in his eyes. His lack of good news on my fiancé didn’t help the tension either.

“Sev? How is she?” Lily asked, wiping her eyes.

He looked paler than normal and was out of breath. “Oh fuck, she- they’re- _fuck_.” He ran a shaking hand down his face and tried to calm his breathing. “Mulciber was _bragging_ about what he was going to do. I- he- the Dark Lord gave him _permission_.” He spat.

My blood ran cold. “Permission for what?” My voice could’ve cut diamonds.

“He let slip her location.” I shot up from my seat and secured my wand in its holster. I noticed James doing this as well.

“The older Nott Estate. Not many people knew it still existed. You need to hurry before he-” Snape stopped abruptly unable to finish.

I nodded and looked at James. We made eye contact and disapperated.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

I woke to a pounding in my head and slowly opened my heavy eyelids only to wince at the light. My body ached from residual effects of the cruciatus. I could feel many cuts still bleeding. These monsters were no stranger to various means of torture. My occlumency must have been better than I thought, however, because I’ve managed to protect most of the important information from my interrogators. Frustrated, Voldemort eventually had to forgo the cruciatus all together so not to drive me to insanity and render me incapable of providing information. I had no idea how long I’d been here, alternating between staring at the grey walls of my cell and receiving physical and mental torture. I was never left alone or left in a position where I could get the upperhand. How I longed to see Lily and James and Remus and Regulus, even Snape would do. My thoughts strayed to Sirius. I’d give anything to hear him joke about marrying me. I looked down at my left hand and thought better of it. The door opened revealing my newest form of torture in the shape of Mulciber.

“Ah, my little mudblood. We meet again.” He smiled triumphantly. I remained silent.

“I’m sure you remember our last meeting. I think it’s high time we finished what we started.” He roughly grabbed my arm and pulled me up and started leading me out of the small cell. I wondered when they’d resort to this form of punishment. Perfect. A man thinking with his cock is a man weakened.

“ **Do you still** have a working cock after my parting gift?” I smirked. He punched me for my insubordination hard enough to break my nose, blood trailing down my face.

He continued leering and making jibes the whole way to a room with a bed. I took note of the route we took to get here. He opened the door and roughly shoved me in before closing the door and unbuckling his belt.

“No need for silencing charms, I want everyone to here you scream.” He shoved me against the wall and crashed his mouth to mine and started to grope me. Reluctantly, I moved my mouth against his hoping that my cooperation will allow him to take his guard down. Repulsed by my actions, I reached out and started to undo the zipper on his pants almost gagging when I felt his erection.

“Eager are we? Fucking mudblood whore.” No, I just noticed his wand in his back pocket. He slapped me across the face and that’s when I realized he _wants_ me to struggle. He gets off on it the sick bastard.

Roughly he ripped the fabric on the tunic I’d been wearing and pulled it away leaving me only in my bra and knickers. Bile rose up at the sight of him looking over my body. I resisted the urge to cover up.

“Not half bad for a muggle bitch.” He stepped out of his trousers and pulled his shirt over his head. He grabbed me by my hips and pushed me back onto the bed. I winced at the feeling of the sheets on my sliced back. He leaned over me and spread my legs apart with his knees as his hands roamed and grabbed. He ripped the rest of my clothing away from my body leaving me bare. This was getting out of hand; I needed to take over the situation soon. He bit my nipple hard and I whimpered, he chuckled. Without warning he shoved two of his thick filthy fingers in my opening, I cried out and tried to calm my breathing.

“Already wet for me, my pet?” He laughed. I was pretty sure it was blood he was feeling. I focused on changing my body, growing fur, swishing a tail, sharp teeth protruding from my gums.

 **I opened my eyes and snarled.** I pushed him off and stalked over to him. I slashed my paw catching him across his stomach. He fell to his knees. I slashed again for hurting me, and again for those he hurt before me. Animal instincts took over and I went for his neck. I bit down until I tasted coppery blood and held it until he stopped thrashing. I dropped his body to the floor with a heavy thud and stalked over to his discarded jeans. I grabbed his wand in my mouth and made my way into the hallway taking the backwards directions I memorized on the way up and avoiding any person I saw.

Somehow I made it to the parlor undetected and rushed as fast as my animalistic body will carry me to the door leading out. I heard shouting behind me and looked over my shoulder to see three people chasing me and shooting curses. I looked forward once more and ran faster. Someone stepped in front of the door and I skidded on the sick tile changing direction and leaping for the window. It burst open and the shards of glass caught the light from the sun forming beautiful miniature rainbows. I landed on my feet and kept going despite the stabbing pain from the glass.

I heard two pops of apparition and what I saw made my heart soar. I ran with renewed vigor past the wards of the estate and straight toward my rescuers. I transformed back a few feet in front of them and fell to my knees sobbing in pain and relief. I felt strong arms around me and buried my face into the familiar scent of home.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

My anger was steadily growing since Snape mentioned Mulciber’s name. With two distinct pops James and I arrived outside Nott Estate. We were momentarily struck with fear as a black panther was racing toward us. Death Eaters were spilling out of the building in the distance shooting curses at the huge cat. Then the panther transformed and revealed a very naked, bleeding, and sobbing Hermione. I hurried over removing my robe and putting it around her and pulling her up into my arms. She turned her face into my chest and my heart broke at her distress. I wasted no time before disapperating to our flat.

The unannounced arrival startled the occupants of the room of which now included Remus and Regulus. I pushed past them and took Hermione to our bedroom, paying no mind to the gasps and exclamations in my wake. I laid her down and tried to go get potions and medical supplies, but Hermione had a death grip on my person.

“Lily!” I called. She rushed in and took one look before discerning the problem. She left to go get all the supplies she’d need while I stayed comforting my distraught witch.

“I flooed Poppy, she should be here any second. Between her and Lily, she’ll be fine Padfoot.” James said from the doorway. I looked up and nodded.

I knew she’d be put through hell and tortured, but nothing prepared me for seeing the results. Malnutrition was a given, bruises were to be expected, a broken bone didn’t faze me. It was the nerve damage from prolonged cruciatus that would cause her to develop arthritis in her twenties and suffer bouts of numbness in her limbs and the bleeding between her legs where the sick fuck touched her- not enough to cause irreparable damage physically but mentally, and the new scars. The new scars were the worst. A list of names down her back with mine at the top. Later Hermione would explain that Bellatrix took pleasure marking me with those that couldn’t help me. Sirius in angry capital letters. James where the ‘S’ is slightly bigger than the rest of the letters. Lily with a deep drag on the stem of the ‘Y’. Remus done with claw marks as a form of agonizing irony. Harry and Ron with lines through their name because they’ll never see her again.

Later, after I’d helped her get cleaned up in a bath and coaxed her into eating a bit of soup, we lay in our bed together for the first time in a month. I had my arms around her middle, holding her as tightly to me as I could while being careful of her injuries and she had her head resting on my heart. She looked up at me and even though her face was gaunt and her eye was bruised, she was more beautiful than I’d ever seen her. And I told her as much. She just smiled sadly and looked down at her left hand. Noticing this, I carefully picked up her hand and laced my fingers through hers, mindful of the bandages.

She’d told me the story of how it happened. Bellatrix had her tied to a chair. She was giggling like a school girl with a pair of muggle scissors in her hand. She went on a tirade about sullying pure bloodlines and how she couldn’t let that happen. It wasn’t any interrogation, she didn’t want information for Voldemort. She couldn’t let a Black, not even a bloodtraitor, tie himself to a mudblood. She did it for her own twisted pleasure. She was just doing her duty as a respectable pureblood when she cut Hermione’s left ring finger off. Just below the second knuckle.

“We can still fit an engagement ring on it.” I whispered. She looked at me for a long moment.

“Are you proposing?” She asked wearily.

“Only if you’re saying “Yes”.” I let go of her hand and leaned off the bed and reached into the front right pocket of my jeans and pulled out the small ring I’d been carrying every day for the better part of a year.

She had tears streaming down her face, nodding her head vigorously. I carefully removed the bandage, pleased to see it mostly healed, just tender. I slowly slid the ring on her tiny nub of a finger. She held it out in front of us and we admired the way it looked. Perfect.

“She should’ve cut lower. She didn’t do a very good job of thwarting our plans.” I whispered in her ear.

“They were safety scissors.” She said smiling back at me. We laughed.

* * *

A week later, life had continued. Everyone helped Hermione return to health. While she wasn’t back to the way she was, she was slowly getting there. I helped her through nightmares, and dried her frustrated tears. I was the only one she told about killing Mulciber, however, Snape’s knowing glances did little for her conscience. She called herself a murderer and that she was no better than the death eaters themselves. I pointed out the difference being that she actually felt guilt and that it was self-defense.

Everyone was over the moon when we announced our official engagement, the reason why we were all sitting around together celebrating. We’d just filled our glasses for our second round when the floo activated and Snape stepped through.

“’Mione, we seem to have a bat infestation, no matter how many times we get rid of it, it just keeps coming back.” I told my fiancé. Everyone laughed except the bat himself.

“Behave yourself.” She hissed. “Severus, what horrible news did you bring for us today?”

Snape, not the least put off at her teasing tone, responded with a toneless voice. “I just overheard a prophecy made by Trelawney, however, it’s not the same one you told me to lookout for.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I said I'd post one chapter a day and then I immediately fucked up. That pretty much explains my life tbh.
> 
> Anyway, hope you enjoyed.


	19. Chapter 19

**HERMIONE**

Alarm bells were ringing. Somewhere in the back of my mind McGonagall’s warning was playing on a loop. _Bad things happen to those who mess with time._ _Bad things happen to those who mess with time._ I’ve changed too much. No one in the room was moving, the laughter was falling off their faces. Once again were struck with reality.

“What’s the new prophecy, Severus?” Lily asked breaking the silence that had fallen on the room.

He took a breath and relayed what he’d heard. “ _A girl with the power to end it all is here… A girl of least blood, A girl out of time… She will take her brother’s place for she is marked… Both powers will die and death will rise from the ashes, her next generation will live on… A girl with the power to end it all is here…”_

“At least you stayed to hear the other half this time.” I muttered. Sirius snorted. Snape glared at him.

“Well, it’s obvious who it’s about.” James said.

“Are we entirely sure?” Lily asked, hopefully.

“How many other witches do you know who are “out of time”?” I asked sarcastically, rubbing a hand across my face and pinching the bridge of my nose.

“You don’t have a brother, and you aren’t marked.” Regulus said.

I let out a hollow laugh. “I always considered Harry my brother, so yes I’m taking his place. As for being marked well…” I rolled up my sleeve. “What’s better than being branded by a death eater?” Regulus and Snape looked disgruntled by my callousness and shifted awkwardly, rubbing their left forearms. I put my head in my hands. I knew it would come down to me, I just didn’t expect so much change. What else have I altered being here? I felt the weight of an arm on my shoulders and leaned into the comfort of the body it belonged to.

“Are we sure that defeating Voldemort is for the better?” Remus asked cautiously.

“What? Of course it is, are you mad?” Sirius flew off the handle.

“Look, what did it say? “the power to _end it all_ ”? Not to mention “ _death_ will rise from the ashes”.” He looked around. “That doesn’t sound very comforting.” Everyone was silent, contemplating this piece of information.

“Remus, you have no idea what a life under Voldemort’s rule will look like.” I took a deep breath. “He had a muggleborn registration list. He was putting them in Azkaban for _stealing_ magic. He had snatchers that would capture those who tried to run. They hunted muggles for sport. He executed anyone who opposed him.” I looked up at the appalled faces of the room. “He would kill us all just for being alive.”

I thought back to that time we spent on the run and shuddered. Death eaters everywhere. A taboo on His name. I remembered the statue at the ministry when we broke in, showing the muggles’ true place. I thought of sitting next to the pink toad while they questioned a muggleborn witch on trial for impossible crimes. I remembered snatchers combing the woods just outside our wards on the camp, carrying prisoners. I looked around the room. I couldn’t let these people, _my family_ , live in that kind of world. I’d take my chances with whatever else.

“So what do we do?” Lily asked anxiety written on her face. Briefly I thought that all this stress couldn’t be good for the baby. Harry. I get to see him again soon. He’ll grow up how he was always meant to. Loved by family and friends. The left side of my mouth quirked up.

“We destroy him. Destroy the horcruxes. Continue as planned.” Sirius said in a determined voice.

“How do we do that? We still don’t have the other one and we don’t-“

“Wait!” I cut James off. “Severus, in the previous timeline, Dumbledore knew you overheard the prophecy and that you went straight to Voldemort with it.”

“Your point being?” He drawled in a manner that was reminiscent of his older counterpart.

“My point is that you need to go to Voldemort now and relay the prophecy.” I explained hurridly.

“But won’t that make you an even bigger target if he knew you’ll eventually be his downfall?” Sirius asked worriedly putting his arm around me once more in a protective manner.

I shook him off, I was in planning mode and had no time for cuddling. “Not if he gives Voldemort the old prophecy.” I smirked.

“Won’t that put James and Lily and Harry in trouble again?” Remus asked.

My smirk dropped. I looked over at the couple guiltily. “Yes, but it will likely give us a definite window of opportunity when the time comes to kill Voldemort once and for all.”

“Halloween 1981.” Lily said understanding.

“Halloween 1981.” I confirmed.

“We’ll do it.” James said without hesitation.

“Prongs-“ Sirius pleaded. I could tell he was having trouble with the most important people in his life being placed in immediate danger.

“Padfoot, if it will end this, I will gladly be the bait.” He said proudly, Lily nodding in agreement.

With that, Snape left to go relay the old prophecy. We tried to lighten the mood and continue celebrating, but the news of the war was making that difficult.

I had nightmares that night of what may come to pass this time around on October 31, 1981.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

We spent the next few months planning and debating. Everyone was well aware of the deadline and the closer we got to it, the thinner everyone’s patience got. Hermione was taking it the worst. Despite everyone pulling their equal weight, she took it upon herself for the blame. No one blames her, truly. No one had ever broken into Gringotts and fiendfyre is difficult to control safely even for the best of wizards.

Hermione was glad when spring finally came around and added warmth to England. She claimed she could feel the chill in her bones and joints that ached. Never had I wanted to kill a death eater more. No one in their early twenties should have aches and pains like that of an elderly person.

We were debating over what substances and gadgets could get past Thief’s Downfall when a silvery doe burst into the room, distracting the inhabitants.

Fully expecting to hear Lily’s voice, we were surprised when a quiet, out of breath man spoke.

“The McKinnon’s, now.”

Hermione, who had gone completely paled, jumped into action attaching her holster and getting her bag. She sent a patronus to James, who was with Lily today, alerting him of the development. This brought the rest of us out of our stupor and Regulus went about preparing the place for possible guests while Remus grabbed his wand and disapperated. I side-alonged Hermione and we landed in a battle.

We raced up to the front door which was kicked in, ducking spells as we went. The dark mark was already over the house and someone had lit a fire in one of the rooms. We made it to the living room in time to see James stun a death eater who had his back turned and Remus disappear down a hallway. I made to follow him but tripped over something. I looked to see what it was and was met with glazed over eyes that belonged to Marlene’s father. I felt rage build up as a hand came into view. I looked up to see Hermione with a determined expression on her face. I took her hand and let her help me up.

We raced up the carpeted stairs leading up to the second floor and paused only to confirm that Marlene’s mother had met the fate of her father. We saw flashes coming from the room at the end of the hall and sprinted into the room. Marlene was, thankfully, alive, but hovered protectively over her little brother who was looking around the room with terrified eyes, tears streaming down his face. Hermione incarcerated one of the death eaters as I dueled another. Hermione joined Marlene in protecting her brother. I sent a severing hex at the cloaked figure and smirked when it hit leaving him without a hand to hold his wand. I stunned him and turned to face the rest of the room just as the remaining death eaters disapperated, the cowards.

Marlene bent down and picked up her seven year old brother and held him. Remus came in and said that James had taken Marlene’s younger sister to the Potter’s. She nodded and asked about her parents. She simply nodded when we shook our heads sadly, grief not having caught up with her yet. We side-alonged both her and her brother to the Potter’s and began making plans for them.

It was decided that she’d stay with the Potter’s as they had more room for guests than the flat ‘Mione and I shared, and she didn’t know about Remus’s secret so she couldn’t stay there. We also let her knew about Regulus’s defection and fake death. We didn’t tell her about the plan for killing Voldemort. We knew we’d have to eventually, but we didn’t think she could take in so much information at once having just lost her parents. Or at least that’s what we told ourselves as the reason for not telling her.

Eventually, Regulus got tired of waiting on us to come back, so he flooed over. He looked relieved for a moment before berating us for not sending him an update. We could tell he was worried about us, even if he’d deny it to his last breath. Marlene came down the stairs after having just put her younger siblings to bed. She took one look at Regulus and broke crumpling to the floor under the weight of the events of the day. Curiously, Regulus was the one to comfort her. I shared a look with Hermione.

“I should’ve been there, I could’ve done something. I could’ve helped.” He said, looking sadly at Marlene’s shaking figure.

“No, Reggie, they would’ve seen you and reported back to-“

“That’s it!” Hermione exclaimed.

“Love, I’m trying to scold my baby brother.” I joked. She shushed me with overexcited gesticulations.

“No, no. We don’t have to break into Gringotts!” Everyone looked at her funny. Even Marlene had stopped crying.

When no one answered, she continued on excitedly. “Regulus is the heir to the House of Black because he never actually died, and he can get into the Black Vaults which is right next to the Lestrange vault and we confound the goblin... We just hide Reggie under the invisibility cloak, the goblins are sworn to secrecy, it’s perfect!” She rambled in half thoughts, brain thinking too fast for her voice to keep up. Her hair was sparking, magic manifesting itself with her emotion. It’s adorable.

“You brilliant witch!” I picked her up in a hug and spun her around kissing her forehead over and over again.

Everyone was excited, overjoyed we finally figured it out. We were about to go into detailed planning when an extra presence made itself known.

“Breaking into Gringotts?!” Marlene screeched. We cringed. So much for keeping it secret.

“Calm down, Love.” Regulus said, rubbing circles on her back. I smirked at ‘Mione she smirked back. “It’s not without good cause.”

“Five months. Ten galleons.” Hermione mouthed at me.

“Good cause?!”

“Three months. Twenty.” I mouthed back.

“What good could come from breaking into an impenetrable bank?!” Marlene continued unaware of the bet taking place.

“You’re on.” Hermione smirked.

“The death of the Dark Lord.” Regulus said. Everyone was silent.

Marlene started laughing like we were crazy.

“You can’t- be serious!” She looked around at our stony expressions.

“Merlin’s beard, you are!” Her smile died.

“See, here’s the thing…” James began.

* * *

**HERMIONE**

Within the following couple months, we had everything planned out and had a perfect opportunity. Remus was on a month long mission in the mountains for the Order tracking Greyback, and James was gone for the week working with Mad-Eye in France to stop the spread of Voldemort’s influence. Both begrudgingly agreed that with them, gone it provided perfect cover while Regulus, Sirius, and I got the horcrux. With Lily being so heavily pregnant, she would stay behind with Marlene caring for her and the two younger ones.

Marlene eventually understood what it is we’ve been doing and were going to do. She still doesn’t know I’m from the future, but luckily, she didn’t question how we knew Voldemort’s life story. She took her parent’s deaths hard and it made it harder when her young siblings didn’t truly grasp the concept that they were gone. To the surprise of everyone, Regulus became her pillar of strength. It was becoming evidently clear that I am in serious danger of losing my bet with Sirius. That is if Regulus works up the courage in another month.

Currently, I was donning my new dragon hide dueling jumpsuit, courtesy of Sirius as an “engagement gift”. He claimed that regular robes got in the way of movement when fighting. While that’s true, I personally think he likes looking at my ass in the tight piece. No matter, it was good armor, protecting against all kinds of heat and really thick so it protects against most curses. Lightweight charm making it easy to move in without tiring and a disillusioned thigh holster for an extra wand. I also loved the way the dark scales glinted purple in the correct lighting. Needless to say, Sirius was rewarded well for his efforts.

I was just finished lacing up the boots when Sirius walked in, ready to go as well. He groped my ass as he passed, confirming my earlier thought, and shook out the invisibility cloak. Regulus who watched the display with exaggerated disgust quickly became intrigued as his brother placed it over him and myself. With a nod from Sirius, he disapperated and I quickly side-alonged Regulus, following him.

Regulus had to crouch slightly so our feet wouldn’t show and I tried not to think about the lithe seeker’s build of my soon-to-be brother-in-law pressed so closely up against me. Sirius walked ahead of us, opening the front doors to the bank just slightly longer than normal to allow us to follow through. With aristocratic grace that had quite literally been beaten into him, he strode up to the desk of the first available Goblin and asked to speak in privately about his confidential accounts. With a slight sneer, the goblin led him, and unknowingly us, to a small office and placed up locking and silencing charms as standard procedure.

Without further ado, Regulus emerged from the cloak with a dramatic flourish worthy of Severus Snape. If the goblin was surprised he made no show of it and instead remained indifferent and unconcerned, sneer remaining ever-present.

“It’s not actually my own accounts that need to be looked at, it is my brother’s. He faked his death so-“

“Yes, yes. You wizards always trying to pull something over.” The goblin cut Sirius off. We waited to see if we were about to get throw out for our trickery.

“Well then, Lord Black, what can we do for the _sole_ heir of such and Ancient and Noble House?” He asked with a question that eluded impatience and insult.

“I would like to have a look in my vaults, and if possible that of my cousin, Bellatrix Black.” Regulus drawled.

“Your cousin is a Lestrange and as such I cannot allow you entrance into that vault, however, we can see your other vaults. Will that be it?” The goblin said, bored of the conversation.

“Yes.”

“Right this way.” He said picking up a ring of very old keys belonging to the vaults of the old families that resided on the same level.

Regulus got back under the cloak earning an unimpressed look from the goblin. We followed him through the main floor and to the caves. Once out of sight, Regulus emerged once more and we boarded the mine cart. I had to grip Sirius’s robes through the fabic of the invisibility cloak just so I wouldn’t lose my balance on the erratic twists and turns leading down. The Thief’s Downfall was coming up and I crossed my fingers. Relief flooded me as the cool sensation washed over me without stripping the cloak’s power.

The cart came to a stop and with shaky legs, we exited and gained our footing on the solid ground. We stared in awe and slight fear at the dragon guarding the vaults. I watched with sadness filling my heart as the goblin used a clacker to push the dragon back. Regulus and Sirius didn’t seem fazed as they’d been here enough times. The goblin was searching through the ring for the correct key when I hit him with a confundus charm. I cursed silently when he turned around, unfazed but enraged. Apparently Goblins are immune to smaller hexes. I cursed again at the incompetency of wizarding research.

“You dare try to-“

“ _Imperio!”_ I pulled the cloak off and Sirius and I looked at Regulus in shock as the goblin began searching for the Lestrange key.

“I’m already considered a death eater. And we really need to get in that vault.” He shrugged.

The goblin opened the vault against his will and we were struck with déjà vu of looking through piles and piles of junk for a horcrux except this time it was piles of _gold_ and trying to find a _gold_ horcrux. Sirius reached out to pick up an antique-looking silver shield.

“Stop!” Regulus exclaimed before he could make contact. “I’m willing to bet they’ve put up heavy protections on everything in here.”

We wandered through the vault looking at all the wealth and jewels and heirlooms, careful not to accidentally step on something or brush up against an object. I thought back to the picture I’d seen in researching. The Hufflepuff cup was small and made of gold, two black gems on each of the thin handles and a badger on the front. Something that wouldn’t look out of place here. Suddenly, I stopped, my eyes resting on the top of one of the gold piles in the center of the place directly in front of us. Sirius and Regulus nearly ran into me at my sudden halt.

“There, that’s it.” I pointed.

“How are we going to get it without setting off the protections?” Regulus mused almost to himself.

“ _Accio horcrux!_ ” Sirius tried. Nothing happened. He shrugged. “Worth a shot.”

“We could levitate something and try to knock it down?” I offered.

In response Regulus and Sirius both levitated different heirlooms and tried to guide them to collide with the cup. It seemed that someone had foreseen this method because anytime a piece would come near it, it would change direction as if there was some kind of force field around it. They let go of their objects letting them crash on the pile. We were too busy looking around the vault for inspiration to notice the miniature landslide of galleons pool at our feet making contact and multiplying. Only when Sirius cried out holding his ankle when his jeans were singed through did we realize.

“Gemino and flagrate.” I breathed, panicked. More coins and jewels were multiplying at exponential rates and though my dragon hide suit was built to protect against heat, I could still feel the warmth.

“Fuck it!” Sirius yelled and made a dash trying to climb up the mountain. Regulus and I soon followed, tripping and sliding. The gold was now forming an avalanche threatening to overwhelm us, but at least it was bringing the cup in our direction. Galleons sliding and jumping allowing the cup to come closer and closer.

“Got it!” I exclaimed. We were waist deep and sinking when I clasped my hand around the thin handle.

As if the objects knew, the curse seemed more rapid than before. We were scrambling, practically swimming despite the burns toward the vault’s opening. Up to our shoulders now, it seemed impossible. My hands were scorched, my neck was catching fire. Hand clenched white knuckled around the cup. Almost there. Over our heads in gold. I felt a hand clamp on my wrist and pull.

I fell on my knees. My skin relished in the cool air from the deep cave. Sirius and Regulus were kicking gold pieces back inside, the goblin started to shut the vault with a glazed expression on his features. I stood up and held the horcrux up to examine. If the badger on the front didn’t confirm it, the radiating darkness would. I shared a smile with the boys.

I performed a glamour charm on Sirius and Regulus to hide the obvious burn marks while I got back underneath the cloak. Regulus took the Imperious curse off the goblin and I obliviated any memory of us going into the Lestrange Vault from his mind. To keep up appearances, Regulus went into the vault and took out a small box. After going back up the winding mine track, we exited quickly and apperated home to treat our wounds.

I felt a little bit of the stress I’ve carried lift from my shoulders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are as promised! Hope you guys have a nice day/night! Thank you for reading!


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: for smut, bolded if you wanna skip!

**SIRIUS**

“Back again boys? Are we up to no good?” Myrtle giggled. She’s had it out for us since we hid out from filch in second year.

“What makes you say that? Maybe we came back for you?” James winked. We try not to upset her. Peter, with the grace of a baby erumpet, had the gall to ask about her death. Never again.

“Oh but who would ever come back for miserable Myrtle? Miserable, moping, moaning-“

“Yes, we understand, Myrtle.” Hermione had no patience for her.

“No you don’t! How could you when you’re all still alive?!” She screeched and started crying. Her hiccupping sobs could be heard all the way until she disappeared into the toilets.

“Why’d you do that? She’s much easier to handle when she isn’t so emotional.” I asked Hermione.

“Because she’s a gossip and she’ll let people know that we were here and what we were doing if they ask her nicely enough. This way she won’t be able to say anything. It’s just a bonus she can’t pester us.” She began digging through her beaded bag.

“Jealous, love?” I smirked and flipped a piece of hair that was hanging in front of her face. She glared.

“Do we have everything we need?” Remus asked before she could retort.

“Wands?” Regulus asked.

“Check.” Everyone twirled theirs in their hand.

“Blindfolds?” Remus added.

“Check.” I called before casting the spell on James.

“Oi!”

“Roosters?” No one said anything.

“I thought you got them!” James and I exclaimed and pointed at each other.

“Me? It was your job!” We said together.

“I’ve got them!” Hermione called and struggled to pull a cage of stuptified roosters out of her bag.

We decided that it was best to try and kill the basilisk instead of trying to control fiendfyre. None of us would be adequately efficient to perform the spell safely in the amount of time we had, and after asking around, no one had a stock of basilisk fangs or venom on hand so we couldn’t buy them. So killing the giant snake in the pipes under Hogwarts was our last resort. We agreed that it was safer to do this during the summer so that there were no children around.

Hermione gave the roosters to Remus and walked over to the sink that had snakes adorning the faucet. She started making what was supposed to be hissing noises.

“What is she doing?” Regulus asked.

“You have to speak Parseltongue to open it.” I answered.

“So she’s a Parselmouth?” He was confused.

“No.” She turned around frustrated. “I revisited my memory of Harry talking and tried to translate those sounds to books I’ve been studying so I can be able to say ‘open’.” She groaned and rubbed her hands across her face.

“Try again. We know you can do it.” James put a hand on her shoulder.

She sighed and turned back around. She tried her garbled hissing again and again. Pissed off at her failed attempts, she balled her hands into fists at her sides and spoke in an angry hiss.

The structure came apart and the sink lowered to reveal a hole in the ground. We looked at each other before jumping in one after another and sliding down the slimy slide. After casting a cleansing charm, I looked around at the dingy, dark pipe we were in.

“Come on. It’s most likely asleep since the heir isn’t here.” Hermione said as she started walking down the pipe. We followed her taking care to step over bits of rubble and shallow puddles. We could hear the echo of slow dripping water from somewhere in this maze of pipes. The only light coming from the tip of our wands.

We made it to second door that was decorated with serpents. As Hermione tried Parseltongue again, we took to scanning the rest of the pipe. James picked up a flake that looked like molted skin and grimaced. Remus levitated a huge scale up for us to see. I didn’t want to think about the size of the beast that scale belonged to. Hermione let out a triumphant cry as the snakes began to slither and the door was opened.

“Is that…?” Remus trailed off in awe at the statue at the far end of the chamber.

“Salazar Slytherin? Yes.” Hermione finished while fishing around in her expanded bag for the roosters. My face cringed in disgust. What my family wouldn’t give to see this. I noticed Regulus staring slightly awestruck. I shook my head.

I walked over to one of the small pools and looked at my reflection in the water. A twenty year old man should not look this tired. I noticed James’ reflection attempting to sneak up behind me to push me in. I moved out of the way at the last minute and laughed when he lost his balance and fell in. War or not, we can still be twenty year olds.

“Be quiet! You’ll wake it…” Hermione trailed off of her scolding as the sound of stone scraping together filled the room. “…up.” Salazar Slytherin’s mouth was open and we could hear it slithering.

“Close your eyes! Close your eyes! Blindfolds!” Hermione whispered frantically. We performed the blindfolding spell on ourselves and listened. No one moved. We heard the slithering getting closer, I chanced a look in the reflection of the water through the slit at the bottom of the blindfold. I saw a large mass of scaled moving past and coming closer. Suddenly it stopped and we could feel it raise its head prepared to strike. Someone yelled for us to run and we split in different directions. I made sure I grabbed Hermione’s hand and sprinted into one of the many pipes.

“It’s not- after- us!” She panted a bit later as we came to a stop in a dead end off to the side. We pushed up our blindfolds.

“We need- to get back- to the roosters.” I breathed. She nodded and grabbed my hand dragging me back the way we came. I cringed at the amount of noise we were making sloshing through the water. As we were coming up to an intersection, I noticed gentile waves lapping around on of the corners and heard fast approaching sloshes.

“Stop! Blindfold!” I held Hermione back just before the intersection and pulled her to the side. She stayed silent and immobile. The sloshing grew louder and we could hear voices accompanying it.

“Of course! It just- _had-_ to follow- us!” A voice that sounded like James said.

“Can’t you- turn into a deer- or something- and run faster!?” Regulus’s exasperated voice filtered through as they passed.

“A _stag_! And no- my antlers- would catch- on the roof.” James grumbled. Regulus’s laughter echoed long after they disappeared farther into the pipes. We heard the basilisk slithering by chasing to the guys.

We stood up slowly and pushed up our blindfolds and waited for the path to clear.

“So how do we make the roosters crow?” I asked Hermione quietly. She thought for a moment.

“Really strong lumos?” She said shrugging unsurely. I nodded thinking it could hopefully work.

The tail end went by and we started running again. In no time at all we arrived back at the main chamber and found Remus already enervating the stunned roosters. Hermione helped him with the last couple while I walked slowly over to one of the pipe openings. I heard echoes of the guys yelling expletives. I hoped they weren’t getting fatigued from running. I also hoped they wouldn’t be stupid enough to look behind them. Faintly, I noticed the echoes growing louder and small rippled forming in the water in the pipe in front of me. They grew even louder and I ran back to where Remus and Hermione were with the roosters.

“Run! Run!” Regulus and James were shouting at us in warning and waving their arms trying to get us to leave.

“No! Lure it over here!” Hermione yelled with her hands cupped around her mouth. If the boys were confused they didn’t show it; they ran over to where we were gathered and fell to the ground out of breath. The rest of us raised our wands in the general direction above the roosters. We felt the basilisk raising itself again to strike.

“ _Lumos Maxima!_ ” We shouted together. We heard a crow. Then another and another. Soon they had all crowed and we heard a large crash and took off our blindfolds. Cautiously, we walked over to the overgrown serpent and paused waiting for any sign of movement. When nothing happened, Hermione conjured a small bag and walked over to the slacked jaw of the snake and began pulling out fangs careful not to touch the venomous point.

We heard laughter behind us and turned to look at Regulus who was the source. It sounded more like wheezing. “Slytherin’s monster was defeated by a muggleborn, half-breed, and bloodtraitors.” He fell into tired chuckles once more. We soon joined him in laughing at the irony.

“His heir will go down the same way.” Hermione smirked, darkly. I grinned and pulled her into an embrace to which she huffed exasperatedly and returned it with fake reluctance.

We packed up our things and drug our tired bodies out of the chamber. We were glad that Myrtle was still absent and wasn’t there to pester us. We didn’t bother with cleaning charms as we were looking forward to a relaxing shower. Or in my case, a hot bath with a beautiful witch and maybe some scented oils. I was brought out of my daydreaming when James tripped over a root in the secret passageway we were using to leave through Hogsmeade. We apperated back to the Potter’s house and sighed contentedly, praising ourselves silently for our job well done. One step closer to the end of the war.

We’d just placed our things down when Lily came bursting into the room leaning over trying to put on her shoe with a frantic Marlene standing behind her with wide eyes.

“Oh good, you’re back. My water just broke.”

* * *

**HERMIONE**

It was around 6:03pm on July 30 when I nearly had a panic attack as bad as James’s.

Then it was about 7pm when I was in the waiting room and smelled the scent of sewage on my person from our earlier activities. Or maybe that was Sirius.

Around 8:30, I was procrastinating getting out of the lukewarm bath that used to be hot and contemplating staying there forever never wanting the broad chest that was behind me or the gooseflesh-peppered arms surrounding me to leave.

9:45 saw my fiancé handing me my second cup of coffee with a small frown on his aristocratic face.

10:30 and Regulus and Marlene left to care for her siblings and Remus was sleeping in an uncomfortable waiting room chair.

Midnight brought me out of my catatonic state when I felt Sirius’s head slump on my shoulder. Absently, I ran my fingers through his raven locks thinking I couldn’t believe my luck with him. He hadn’t tried to force me to talk, just stayed with me providing comfort in his presence. He let out a soft snore and I smiled for the first time all night. He tried to stay up with me.

1:54 and my head fell against my fiancé’s and I joined him in a nervous slumber.

6:23 Remus was waking us up with breakfast complements of St. Mungos cafeteria. I attempted to stomach a piece of toast.

It was 7:13 when we saw James again. He was still in his attire from the day before. He refused to go home and shower, not wanting to miss a thing. The only difference was the tear tracks down his face -that Sirius would later claim were manly- and the huge smile on his face when he exclaimed that he was a dad. My stomach went up into my throat. Maybe it was bile.

7:15 saw myself, Sirius, Remus, and the newly returned Regulus and Marlene filing into Lily’s room. I saw the pink bundle in the arms of the new parents and thought it strange that a magical hospital would run out of blue baby blankets.

It had just turned over to 7:16 when I was introduced to Hazel Hermione Potter.

It was 7:17 when I ran.

* * *

I went into the bedroom I shared with Sirius and reached under the bed for a small jewelry box I know to be there. I undid the wards I put on it and opened the lid. I reached in and grabbed the chain and pulled it out. I gazed at the swirling putrid color on the face of the locket. I heard the whispers start up faintly and snapped out of it closing the box with a crack that was too loud in this silent room. I pulled a fang out of my beaded bag and the whispers became violent. No longer charismatic persuasion but harsh accusations. It was like it knew the danger it would be in.

Emotionless, I was immune to the locket’s voices. I placed it on the floor in the middle of the room and started speaking Parseltongue for the third and hopefully the last time. It took fewer attempts to get it to open than it did in the chamber. An airy, milky wisp rose out of the open locket. I held the fang up, prepared to destroy it. My emotionless resolve crumbled as it took the form of Harry. _My Harry_.

“You’ve killed him.” Tom’s voice told me. I fell to my knees.

“The one person you wanted to change the world for.” I blinked and a tear fell down my cheek. ‘Harry’ glared.

“You’ve lost him forever.” I choked. ‘Harry’ turned away from me.

“What else will you destroy?” I gritted my teeth.

“Your attempts are futile.” His silky voice assured me. I gripped the fang tighter.

“Give up.” I brought the fang down on the center of the locket. An inhuman screech filled the silence in the room. The milky apparition disappeared. I stared at the blackened locket and watched small tendrils of smoke billow and disperse in the air above. I gasped in a ragged breath and closed my eyes, both hands still with a white knuckled grip on the fang.

“You haven’t lost him forever.” I felt two arms encircle me. “He’ll always be in your memories.” Sirius kissed my left eyelid. “Your stories you’ll tell.” The right. “And in your heart.” He kissed my forehead. The fang fell out of my grasp and clattered to the floor.

“They named you and I her godparents.” What little resolve I had shattered and I sobbed into his shirt. He picked me up and stepped over the remains of the locket placing me on our bed. I heard him kick off his shoes and he sat down against the headboard, pulled me up against his chest and ran his fingers through my hair while rubbing my arm.

We stayed there like that for hours not moving. I had long since stopped crying. It was well into the afternoon when Sirius spoke again. “Come on, love,” He whispered into my hair. “We’ve got a goddaughter to spoil.”

I gave a small smile and that was good enough for him. Wasting no time, he pulled his shoes back on and pulled me into the floo with him. We stumbled out and he grabbed my wrist and tugged me in the direction of Lily’s room looking very much like an overexcited six year old. We passed Regulus and Remus who were drinking coffee and chatting with huge smiles on their face. They nodded to us as we passed. We made it to Lily’s door and stopped. I stared at the door handle and Sirius stared at me. He squeezed my hand which was still in his hold. I took a shuddering breath and reached out a trembling hand.

The door swung open and revealed a low lit scene. Lily was lying in bed with hooded, tired eyes and a smile on her face. James was bouncing a small bundle of pink at her bedside, happily cooing at his daughter.

“She’s only been here a few hours and already has her father wrapped around her little finger.” Sirius remarked stepping further into the room. The two parents finally looked over chuckling at Sirius’s statement. They stopped when they saw me, apprehensive of what my reaction would be. I felt guilty about that. They shouldn’t have to worry about that.

“Can I hold her?” I whispered. My throat was burning with emotion.

Lily and James shared a look and smiled bigger than before if that were possible. I walked closer to Lily’s side and James passed the baby into my arms. I supported her head with one hand and encircled her small body with the other. I lightly began to bounce the sleeping child, naturally conforming into a motherly position. She was sleeping from James’s earlier care so I took the time to take in her features. Heart-shaped face from her mother, high cheekbones from her father, almond shaped eyes from Lily, slightly upturned nose from James. A rich mahogany splattering of longer hair curtesy of both her parents.

She squirmed a little and opened her sleepy eyes: pale blue, not yet decided whose eyes to take after. She yawned and let out a small sound. My heart swelled. She picked up her small arm and stretched up her little hand trying to reach me. A tear rolled down my cheek involuntarily. I put my large finger in her tiny grasp and she held tight.

“Hello, Hazel Hermione Potter.” I whispered.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

“When are you two going to get married? Honestly, it’s been a year and a half.” Lily huffed while burping Hazel.

“Bloody hell, Lily-flower, you’re not this bad to Reggie and Marls.” I said while arranging the wrapped presents on the coffee table.

“They got engaged a few months ago, it’s nowhere close to you and ‘Mione.” She said wiping her daughter’s face clean. “Do you not want to marry her anymore?” She asked seriously.

I paused in the middle of my task. I glanced across the room into the kitchen where Hermione was licking chocolate off a spoon and swaying her hips while putting the cake in the oven and absently humming a tune I’d bet hadn’t yet come out. I couldn’t imagine a life without her in it. I snapped out of my observations and noticed a smile had grown on my face. “No, Lils, we just want to get through the war first.” I placed the last present on the table and stood back to admire my handiwork.

“You shouldn’t put your life on hold and live in wait or the unexpected will take floor out from under you.” Lily admonished. I glanced back at Hermione and we made eye contact. She stopped mid-sway with a deer in the headlights look on her face. She blushed beautifully at being caught sneaking the batter then proceded to wink and deliberately lick the spoon from base to tip before closing her swotty mouth around it and letting her eyes flutter closed. I felt my mouth go dry and blood rush below my belt. This witch. _My_ witch.

“That’s the last of the decorations. Moony, Marlene, and Regulus should be here in an hour or so.” James said coming into the living room and collapsing on the couch next to his family. Little Hazel perked up at the sight of her father and she clapped her tiny hands together excitedly. Lily passed her over to James who was already cooing and making silly faces. For a brief moment, I felt envious. I glanced up and saw Hermione observing the scene. I knew she was envious as well. We love Hazel and spoil her rotten, but it’s bittersweet because we may never have a child that is truly ours. I shook my head of these thoughts.

It was Hazel’s first birthday. It was the perfect distraction from the war outside this house. The Potter’s have been in hiding for months, recently, there’s been talk of the fidelius charm. Despite our aversion, we’d been hanging with Peter more in the past year attempting to alleviate suspicions and secure his place as secret keeper when the time comes.

Dumbledore had been breathing down our necks trying to find any proof we are changing the future. ‘Talks’ with him after Order meetings had become commonplace. His not-so-subtle threats to Hermione had us all on edge despite her telling us not to worry.

We decided to space out destroying the horcruxes because we weren’t entirely sure if Voldemort could actually feel it. We decided that every few months would suffice so not to draw attention to our task. Hermione destroyed Slitherin’s locket, Regulus destroyed the Hufflepuff cup, and Lily destroyed the diadem-much to James’s chagrin- and Remus destroyed Tom’s diary. All that remained was the Gaunt ring.

“Let me see the little flower.” I crouched in front of the family and held out my hands. James placed her in my arms and I smiled making faces at her. She giggled and clapped her hands before reaching out and grabbing a bit of my hair. “Ah, Little Flower, you’ll realize someday that hair is not to be messed with.” I said in mock exasperation. I heard Hermione snort behind me. Hazel giggled some more. “Oh that’s it!” I began tickling her relentlessly.

She shrieked and giggled girlishly. “Padfoo! Padfoo!”

My fingers stopped and I stared owlishly at the little girl. “Hermione, you owe me twenty galleons!” I said turning to look at her.

“Nope. She said ‘Hermy’ last week, you owe me twenty.” She made a face at her nickname and I barked out a laugh.

The floo announced the arrival of a new guest. We turned around, everyone poised and guarded. War makes people suspicious of everything.

“What’d I miss?” Remus said looking at all the faces in the room. He was closely followed by Regulus and Marlene who had moved into Hermione and mine’s old flat when I bought a house for us.

After security questions had been answered, Lily played hostess and passed everyone a butterbeer while we sat around the living room catching up. It seemed to be Dumbledore’s fixation to make sure we can never all be together at any given time. This gathering was a tiny miracle.

“So, Remus,” I began after taking a long pull on my butterbeer. “Tell us. How’s my cousin.” I smirked. Ever since Hermione let me in on that bit of information, I’d been pestering Remus relentlessly.

“Still in the cradle.” Remus muttered. He mentioned to us once that he’d felt his inner wolf pulling at him one day during a trip to Diagon and it led him to an eight-year-old, bubblegum pink-haired, Nymphadora Tonks who quite literally fell for him immediately. Naturally, we tease him.

“She’ll grow up, and you’ll be happy together-“

“Hermione didn’t you say you made chocolate cake?” He cut Lily off effectively changing the subject.

“Cake!” Hazel yelled from her position in her godmother’s lap.

The first few months after Hazel was born, Hermione tried to fold in on herself and went out of her way to avoid seeing Hazel. I wouldn’t let her. She knew it wasn’t fair to treat the girl differently because she’s not Harry, but I made her realize that even if Harry actually had been born, he wouldn’t be her Harry either. With a little coaxing on my part, Hermione began spending more and more time around Hazel and eventually she was able to carve out a permanent place in Hazel’s life.

After everyone had their fill of cake, we moved on to presents. Naturally, the poor girl was spoiled rotten. Her parents bought her anything and everything. Regulus and Marlene bought her a child’s potion kit. Remus bought her multiple muggle fairytales. Naturally, I bought her her first toy broomstick-without Hermione’s knowledge- and a small black dog stuffed animal which she lovingly named Snuffles. Hermione bought her children’s books and toys as well, but she also gave her the last present.

It was a small box wrapped in Gryffindor red with a gold bow. Hermione kneeled in front of the toddler and helped her open it. Hermione pulled out the small golden snitch and Hazel gazed at it in wonder when it hovered over Hermione’s hand. Hermione wiped a tear away and told Hazel-and the rest of us- a story about how a messy haired boy with glasses won his first ever quidditch match by nearly swallowing that very snitch. James and Lily joined Hermione on the floor and surrounded her in a suffocating group hug.

* * *

Later that night, we flooed to our own small cottage. I followed her into the kitchen and she put the kettle on to make tea. She stood there for a moment looking out the window deep in thought. I slowly walked closer and snaked my arms around her middle and pulled her against my chest.

“Do you know how much I love you?” I whispered into her ear.

“About as much as I love you?” She replied and grinned looking sideways at me.

“More.” I grinned and kissed her cheek.

“Cheeseball.” She laughed. We were quiet for a moment, both looking out the window into the velvet darkness.

“We’re like jigsaw pieces.” I said finally. “Rough around the edges, wonky curves, and holes all around. But we fit together perfectly, made specifically to have each other by our side. We make such a beautiful picture.”

“I half thought you’d relate that to sex somehow what with all that talk about curves and holes and fitting together.” She smirked.

“Love, I was trying to be deep.” I pouted. She turned around in my arms and looked at me.

“You can go deep.” She said in a lower voice. I grinned wolfishly and lowered my lips to her.

 **And _Merlin_ it felt like the first time all over again**. I kissed her passionately with all my emotion and felt her return it with the same need. I traced her bottom lip with my tongue demanding entrance and she obliged. I tasted the chocolate and butterbeer on her tongue just as I’m sure she tasted the same on mine.

The kettle whistled and Hermione pulled back in surprise. I kissed my way along her jaw while she swirled her wand getting rid of the kettle. No desire for tea any longer. I paused at her earlobe and brought it between my teeth and tugged gently. I licked up the shell of her ear and blew cold air on it smirking when she shivered. I felt her tug at my hair bringing my lips back to hers.

My hands fell from her hair, scraping my nails down her back knowing she could feel it through the thin shirt she was wearing. I cupped her ass in both hands and pulled her into me so she could feel my hardened erection. She gasped and I picked her up taking her to our bedroom. I cast a quick spell vanishing our clothes we both hissed as the cool air met our heated bodies. I laid her down on the bed and kissed her neck slowly and deliberately.

I felt her hands leave my hair and trace down my chest inching closer to my cock. I grabbed both her wrists and pinned them above her she made a disgruntled noise that sounded more like a whimper. I nibbled the skin behind her ear and she shuddered against me; I could feel her hardened nipples rub against my chest. I kissed my way down to them leaving wet spots that made her shiver.

I took one of the peaks between my teeth and rolled the other between my thumb and forefinger. She moaned. I lapped at her sensitive nipple and sucked then giving the other the same treatment. She got her hands free and reached down and stroked my aching cock.

“Hermione.” I moaned coming back up to kiss her. She continued to pump her hand and I reached in-between us and started rubbing her clit. Her breath hitched. I flipped her over and held her hips up with one arm teasing my tip to her dripping core with the other.

“Please, Sirius.” She whimpered. I plunged in roughly with no warning. We both moaned at the feeling. I pulled completely out and pushed back in over and over. She gave a strangled cry with each thrust. I grabbed her hair and pulled her head back pumping my cock inside her relentlessly.

“You like that?” I whispered in her ear huskily. She moaned louder. I grabbed one of her tits roughly and squeezed. I picked up the pace.

“I asked if you like that?” I kissed her neck. My thrusts were becoming erratic.

“Yes, Sirius! Uh, _gods_ , yes!” She screamed. Her walls were fluttering. My balls were tightening.

I bit down on the soft flesh on her throat where her shoulder and neck meet and came _hard,_ groaning as my hot seed filled her. I continued slower thrusts riding out my orgasm and rubbing her clit relishing in the sounds she was making. I felt her walls fluttering around my softening member as she climaxed singing my name.

I pulled out and collapsed next to her pulling into my arms and kissing her on the forehead. She nestled into the crook of my neck and kissed my pectoral. I felt her heavy breaths on my chest and her rapidly beating heart just above where my own lay.

 **Jigsaw pieces**. I looked down at my fiancé. Her hair was mussed and her face was flushed. What a beautiful picture indeed.


	21. Chapter 21

**HERMIONE**

The winds were growing colder every day, seeming to bring in the coming storm. Leaves were changing to their dying counterparts. Life, death, life. Cycles running round. Time is upon us, the energy in the air is charged.

The start of October brought along well-hidden panic. Everyone was aware of the deadline and no one wanted to let their carefully placed carefree mask slip. Laughs were hollow, smiles were strained, people would tiptoe around the eggshells of our dispositions.

Sirius was the only one I let see past my façade. Just like always he’d pick up the broken pieces after my breakdown and hold my fragile self together. It was tiring trying to convince Lily and James that there was no true need to worry. I felt like a door-to-door salesman with an awful pitch. The worst part is that they know that my suppositions are in vain because of the very real risk.

The floo to our living room activated early on a Sunday morning. Twenty-seven says until the end whether we win or not. Sirius and I shared a look of trepidation before getting out of bed and languidly getting dressed, stalling for the events of the day. Pushing past my slight nausea, I rolled up the bottoms of my jeans exposing my bare feet before standing and relishing in the safety Sirius’s battered beater’s jersey offered me. I opened my eyes and met my fiancé’s gaze as he slipped his Sex Pistols shirt over his head. He reached out and squeezed my hand once. Twice. We walked out to the living room to greet our guests.

It was a relief to see James already started on a waffle replica of his house in Godric’s Hollow. I put up my mask and cracked a small smile at Lily who rolled her eyes in exasperation before claiming once again that she would be the strawberry. Remus arrived and promptly began helping James with the house that looked more like a hut. Sirius scooped up his goddaughter who was loudly exclaiming that she was going to be a “booburry” and tickled her into submission. Marlene and Regulus stepped out of the fireplace and paused taking in the scene of small chaos that accompanies breakfast planning.

An hour and a half later, the hut-house was a sopping sugary mess with fruit everywhere, but the plan was a go. A week before Halloween, the Fidelius Charm would be cast and Sirius would offer the position of secret keeper. Hazel would spend the week at Auntie Marlene’s in case of an early appearance and be none the wiser. Everyone else, bar Lily and James would be positioned in Godric’s Hollow prepared for any occurrence. When the time came, and Voldemort shows up, Lily would put up anti-apperation charms and James would keep him talking while the rest of us moved in and prepared to fight. The Order would be alerted and it would be the end. I tried not to think about what failure would mean.

After everyone left I collapsed on the couch in exhaustion despite waking up just hours before. Sirius sat down and gingerly moved my head into his lap, running his fingers through my hair combing through various knots. We both sat there with our own thoughts listening to the sounds of nature outside our small cottage.

“Sirius?” He hummed and looked down.

“Will you get me some raspberries?” I asked with pleading eyes. His brows furrowed.

“Love, it’s not the season for raspberries.” He brushed my hair behind my ear affectionately. I frowned.

“Fine. I’ll go get some myself.” I stood up and promptly wavered. I felt two hands on my waist steadying me.

“Woah, you alright?” He asked concerned.

“Yeah, I just stood up too fast.” I blinked and held a hand to my forehead trying to quell the pounding underneath. I let him guide me back to sitting on the couch and he was crouched in front of me with his hands on either side of my face.

“What’s going on, huh? This isn’t the first time you’ve had a dizzy spell, you look positively green most days, and you’re always exhausted.” His concern brought tears to my eyes.

“I think it’s just the stress of this whole situation.” I felt a tear start down my cheek and he brushed it away with his thumb. “Everything could go wrong, a-and-“ His arms encircled me and he held me to his chest.

“You put the world on your shoulders, how many times must we tell you to let us take some of it?” He whispered into my hair.

He summoned a blanket and pillow from our bedroom and placed it around me before lowering me to lay on the couch again. Kissed my forehead and stood up.

“I’ll go find you some raspberries, Kitten. Just stay here and relax.” I smiled up at him and he chuckled before heading out the door. I sighed. How I love that mutt.

* * *

A week later, I was in the kitchen popping more raspberries in my mouth and holding my goddaughter. Lily was at the counter chopping up vegetables for our dinner talking animatedly about a new book she read. An outsider would think she truly loved the book, but I could tell it was only a small distraction. I was bringing another berry to my mouth when Hazel hit it and made it roll on the floor. I glared at her and she giggled. When I turned around Lily was looking at us and smiling. Over the course of Hazel’s short life, she had taken a special liking to her Auntie ‘Mione.

Dinner saw Lily rambling about how frustrating it is that a lot of her muggle technology cannot work in Godric’s Hollow and that she’s falling behind on her television shows. Hazel was making a mess in her high chair and I was silently taking it all in waiting for Lily to crack. She let out a frustrated groan and I paused, fork halfway to my mouth. She started talking about the age-old argument on whether magic is sentient or not. I completely disagreed with her argument but didn’t say anything as I continued to chew the bite of meat that was making me ill.

An hour later, Hazel was down for the count in her room that she uses when she visits us and I was skewering a raspberry on a fork and dunking it in melted chocolate. Lily was giving a half-hearted speech on why raspberries are terrible when dipped in chocolate. I knew she was close.

“It would be slightly better if they were drizzled in white-“ I slid the berry off the fork with my lips and placed it down. I chewed and tasted the juices mixing with the chocolate, waiting.

A tear fell. Then another. And another until she was silently crying and staring at the coffee table. I wrapped my arms around her and the first sob broke through.

“What if they don’t come back?” She croaked.

A few days ago, James and Sirius were sent on an Auror mission to an unknown location. They were hunting out a huge threat that’s escaped Britain for years, likely the work of a death eater from the inner circle and they couldn’t send or receive messages. If everything went well, they’d be back in two weeks, but it’s an extremely dangerous job this time around and there’s a chance it won’t go so well.

“They will, they always do.” I whispered half-heartedly. The truth was, I was feeling the exact same way.

Sirius had come home from work halfway through the day and said he was leaving that night. I promptly ran to the bedroom and broke down in tears hugging his pillow to my chest. He followed and sat with me holding me in silence until he had to leave. I was a mess until Lily suggested we live together until they come back, both feeling too lonely to cope.

“Come on.” I stood up dragging Lily with me. “Let’s go do something productive.”

I led her into the master bedroom and rooted around under the bed that hadn’t been slept in since Sirius left and pulled out the small warded box. Lily’s eyes widened when she realized what we were about to do but she didn’t protest. I opened the box and undid all the enchantments, already feeling the compulsion from the ring to put it on. I set the ring on the floor and dug around my beaded bag for the basilisk fang.

“Wear the ring.” I paused. None of the other horcruxes talked except the locket. I was morbidly intrigued by the magical properties of horcruxes.

“Don’t you want to see Harry or Ron again?” The silky voice coaxed. I was confused as to what it was insinuating.

“Don’t you want to see your beloved fiancé again?” The voice resonated and made me uneasy, compulsion spell was having little effect on me. I noticed Lily leaning forward slightly. I wondered what the voice was telling her.

“You can see them all again. Bring them back.” Lily reached for the ring and I brought the fang down, severing the gem from the band. A piercing scream sounded through the room.

Lily blinked a few times, face pale. “Wh-what was that?” The diadem didn’t put up as intrusive of a fight. Having a voice in your head compelling you was a terrifying concept.

I didn’t answer her. I was too enraptured with the remnants of the ring and more importantly with the stone that posed as a gem. The marking on the stone had haunted my research and multiple arguments with Harry about what was important. All too quickly I caught on to what the voice was meaning. I felt sick. I picked up the stone and pocketed it before vanishing the rest.

“L-let’s go get a drink, yeah? I’d say we deserve it after all that.” Lily tried to smile but it didn’t meet her eyes.

I led her out to the kitchen and poured us two glasses of firewhiskey. Lily immediately knocked hers back but I couldn’t get past the smell. My already nauseous stomach rolled. I stared at the amber liquid for another moment. I breathed in and gagged immediately. I hurriedly set the glass down and ran down the hall to the bathroom emptying the contents of my stomach. Lily followed and was holding my hair away from my face.

“Usually this part comes after the drinking, not before.” She joked with a question written in her voice.

“I think it’s just a bug. Sirius practically had me bedridden right before he left.” I said with a weak voice.

“Well come on, let’s get you some warm tea to settle your stomach and maybe you’ll feel better.”

Too tired to resist, I let Lily mother over me until I was wrapped in a blanket with a cup of tea in my hands. Lily sat across from me with another glass of firewhiskey in hand. My stomach churned at the thought. She sipped it and made a contented noise.

“You know the best thing about not being pregnant? I can drink all the alcohol I want. Now, I’m not an alcoholic but- Hermione? Are you listening to me?”

I stopped listening a while ago, absently I felt the teacup fall from my hands and crash to the floor. The noise brought me back. I made eye contact with Lily.

“Are you alright? You’ve gone deathly pale. Are you nauseous again?”

I got up from my chair and let the blanket fall from my shoulders. I walked over the calendar that I forced Sirius to tack up on the wall. It had adorable black puppies for every month. He wasn’t amused. I started counting backwards.

“Was it something I said? All I said was that you can’t drink when your preg-“ She looked sharply at me. “Do you thi-“

“It’s impossible.” I cut her off shaking my head.

“How late are you?” She asked.

“Three weeks, but it’s just stress.”

“And these symptoms?”

“A cold?” I said weakly. She sighed and walked over to me wrapping me in her arms.

“It’s not impossible, just not likely.” She bent down and picked up the blanket and wrapped it around me once more before leading me out to the living room. We both sat on the couch with my head resting on her shoulder.

“Do you want me to perform the charm?” Lily asked after a while. I stiffened, but nodded.

She pulled out her wand and I closed my eyes and grabbed her free hand. I heard her murmur the incantation and waited for her reaction. When none came I slowly opened my eyes and looked down at my flat stomach. A faint purple glow was surrounding my midsection. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. A tear slipped down my cheek. My mouth contorted into the first true smile I’ve had in weeks. I let out a choked laugh. Lily joined me, relishing in the joy of the moment.

I sobered up quickly. “What if he doesn’t come back?” I echoed Lily’s earlier worry.

“He will, he always does.” She parroted with a small smile.

Not long after, Lily fell asleep. The worry lines on her forehead smoothed over as she remained oblivious in her unconscious dreamscape. I stood up from my spot on the couch, careful not to wake her sleeping form, and tiptoed down the hall passing Hazel’s room and stepped into the master bedroom. I reached into my pocket and felt the smooth surface of the stone that has troubled my mind for most the night. I stared at the white symbol scratched into the black surface. Triangle for cloak. Circle for stone. Line for wand.

_“Don’t you want to see your beloved fiancé again?”_

I closed my eyes feeling a tear drip down leaving a wet trail in its wake. I turned the stone once. Twice. Thrice. I felt a presence in the room. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. The air in the room grew thick. Another tear dripped. I opened my eyes. My knees buckled and I barely registered them hitting the floor likely leaving bruises. I let out a shaky breath.

“H-Harry?” I whispered, barely audible.

The blue form of my best friend nodded with a sad smile. “Hey, ‘Mione.” His voice was warbled, like it was trying to transmit through a faulty radio connection.

“Y-you’re d-dead?” I croaked.

The smoky apparition flickered like a glitch. “Not necessarily. I will never live in this world so therefore, I am dead… in a sense.” His faced contorted, cringing in confusion at his own explanation.

My brows furrowed. “I don’t understand.”

“What’s this? Hermione Granger, know-it-all extraordinaire, doesn’t understand something?” He asked in mocked astonishment.

I cracked a weak smile. “I miss you, Harry. I miss all of you.”

He looked at me a long moment. “We’ll always love you. I always will.” His voice cracked and I couldn’t tell if it was from the glitches or from his emotion. Another tear slipped down my face.

“I thought for sure I’d see Sirius instead of you.” He gave me a crooked smile.

“You should know by now that those horcruxes will try anything to stay whole.”

I hummed noncommittally. He laughed in a way that warbled and clipped.

“So you’re not mad I’m marrying your godfather?” I said changing the subject to happier topics.

“He’s not my godfather.” He said simply. “I’m with mine.” I smiled at the thought of the happiness Harry has found at last.

“Just name your kid after me and will call it even.” He grinned showing all his teeth, laughter sparkling in his eyes. In that moment I could understand why everyone had to mention he looked like his father.

“And if it’s a girl?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Harriet is a very respectable name.” I laughed loudly. He followed.

It felt like all those times we stayed up late in the empty common room talking and laughing. No amount of time or space- even death- could take away the bond we always shared. Right from that moment he and Ron saved me from a troll on Halloween all those years ago.

“Will I see you again?” I whispered once we’d calmed down.

“Not for a very long time I hope.” I nodded and held out my hand to drop the stone, ready to say goodbye.

“’Mione?” I looked up meeting his unsure gaze behind his circular spectacles. “Promise me that you’ll never use the stone to see me again.”

I looked at him. Memorizing his unruly hair that’s so much like his father’s. The eyes he got from his mother that I knew to be a deep green despite the blue tint of his form. Every scar and the memories behind each one. I memorized how happy he looks now in comparison to how haunted he was.

“Okay, Harry, I promise.” I closed my eyes and let the stone fall from my hand and with it the weight I’d been carrying since Dobby brought me to this time.

I slept in the empty bed that night, thinking about the small miracle underneath where the palm of my hand was resting.


	22. Chapter 22

**HERMIONE**

“Miss Granger,” The old man with blue eyes behind half-moon spectacles was pacing back and forth. “I have seen many witches and wizards walk through these doors.”

I was back at Hogwarts. Dumbledore had called me to his office rather than hold me after an Order meeting. It was late at night, no other soul knew I was here, the castle was asleep. Still he paced.

“Many witches and wizards of varying intellect and magical prowess,”

The trinkets that cluttered his office and used to strike wonder and curiosity in my young mind now gives me a headache and a sour taste in my mouth. Faux shuffled on his perch feeling the tension in the air. The paintings of past headmasters have given up pretending to be asleep, eager to witness this conversation.

“Not much can surprise me, Miss Granger, not even a time traveler.”

I prepared myself for his lecture on not changing the future and suspicions on what I’ve been up to. My fingers turned white from their hard grasp on the arms of this chair. My back was stiff and straight, my expression betraying nothing. After so many of these ‘appointments’ with the senile headmaster, I learned to take the path of least resistance and hold my tongue. It made the whole affair go as quickly as possible. As usual, I remained silent.

“I watched a boy named Tom Riddle walk through these halls.” That caught me off guard. “He was the most brilliant boy Hogwarts had ever taught. They claimed he could have been the youngest Minister of his time.” I knew this of course.

“At the time, I was busy dealing with Gellert Grindelwald. Protecting our society no matter the cost.” His pacing grew faster and frantic, arms clasped behind his back tightly. The whirring of his trinkets became maddening.

“I let Tom become Voldemort and I am still fighting for the betterment of society- the greater good. Don’t you see? I will never stop fighting for it.” He stopped pacing abruptly, looking out the window over the grounds into the velvet night.

“It’s for the greater good.” He whispered almost inaudibly. He turned and faced me for the first time that night. His eyes lost its twinkle long ago.

“The Hogwarts ledger notifies us of new students for the coming years.” Confused by the abrupt change in conversation topics I had to acknowledge the truth behind his statement. I read it in _Hogwarts: A History_ : Every time a new witch or wizard is destined to attend Hogwarts, the book will glow.

“Imagine my surprise when I receive a list of names of first years for the year 1993 and one has the surname of Black.” My breath caught in my throat but I pushed down the panicked feeling. I stood slowly and glanced at the door out of the corner of my eye. Too far to go to escape without drawing attention.

“I’m sure you know by now that Regulus is deceased. No other in the Black family that carries the name can create a new life. No other, except Sirius. Who has made it known how he feels for you.” He nodded to the ring on my nub of a finger.

“As I’m sure you’re aware, this… _anomaly_ certainly did not happen in your time.” He sneered out the word ‘anomaly’ like a piece of slime on his tongue.

“You understand I must _correct_ this little mishap?”

Immediately my hands went to cover the flat expanse of my stomach, innate involuntary protection. He must have anticipated this action because he cast a nonverbal _Incarcerous_ and bound me where I stood before I even had a chance to draw my wand from its holster. I stared at him defiantly, I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of my pleas.

“You gave me no choice. It’s for the greater good. I’m protecting you. Protecting us.” I couldn’t tell if he was trying to reason with himself or me. I glared.

He brought both his hands out from behind his back and opened his tight fist. My eyes widened and I gasped involuntarily. I struggled against the restraints but it was no use. My hands remained clasped over my stomach tightly. I felt the cool metal of the chain snake around my neck. I tried to bite his wrinkled hands but he was too quick. I felt the weight of the prototype timeturner fall and rest against my breasts. This man was once considered great but how the mighty have fallen.

“You could have done great things as my goddaughter.” I closed my eyelids tightly as I felt him reach forward and turn the nob.

I felt a burning sensation and watched the room whir past me. Abruptly, it stopped. I looked around trying to figure out what time I was sent to- surly it was wrong. His office didn’t look any different. I heard the door start to open and quickly cast a disillusionment charm over myself. He looked the same as he did when I left so I supposed he didn’t send me that far ahead. That was a relief thinking about Sirius and Lily and the others.

Dumbledore walked in with a forlorn look on his face. He strode over to his desk and pulled open a drawer. He reached inside and pulled out a small wooden box and opened it. He let his wrinkling finger curl around a strikingly familiar gold chain as he lifted the instrument out of the box. He held the time turner tightly in his fist. The door opened again and he began to pace with the timeturner behind his back.

A witch with unruly, brown hair walked in with her head held high and a stoic expression on her face. I had to contain a gasp. Did my hair truly look like _that_ in the back? Self-consciously, I brushed through my own curls with my fingers while I looked around. I noted that the time on the clock read about an hour before my supposed departure. Insipid, old man couldn’t send me in the right direction. The one-sided conversation played out exactly as it did before and I watched my horrified expression when he decided to _fix_ my child. My hands folded over my own stomach once more.

He put the timeturner around my counterpart’s neck and I watched him speak and turn the nob. He stopped as if pained and my brow crinkled in curiosity as my past self faded away. Dumbledore looked down at his hands which looked as if red vines where growing and caressing under his skin and he screamed. Chills ran down my spine. Blood started streaming from various places on his skin and I only then notices it was from cuts. The cuts themselves spelled out words.

_I, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, promise not to meddle with your life in 1978._

Over and over carving into every inch of his skin. Still he screamed. Not much has been written about how one dies when the break an unbreakable vow, now I know why. The process of death is agonizing torture and isn’t pleasant to witness. Briefly I wondered if he resents having such a long name. New words formed across the old man’s forehead and he screamed louder if it were possible. I found I had no sympathy left for the man.

_You broke the vow, now prepare to die._

The cuts began to glow orange and fire started to bleed from his incisions. The smell of burning flesh hit my nostrils and nearly made my nauseous stomach retch. I undid the disillusionment charm and calmly walked over to where the man was writhing in agony. I looked into his pleading eyes with my hardened glint. I smiled cruelly.

Dumbledore stilled and the flames stopped, the red vines from the vow were broken and severed, the cuts were cauterized and forever etched. From his tattered left sleeve, his wand sneaked out and rolled as if sentient to stop at my feet. I reached down and picked up the wand and was met with an overwhelming sense of power that caressed and mated with my magic. I examined the dark wood that had six honeycombed knots spaced up and down with runes carved into the handle and I _knew_. I accepted that the hallows were real when I came into contact with the resurrection stone, but to come across the Unbeatable Wand, the Deathstick. It left a sour taste in my mouth at the thought of the history of this wand. And yet I felt the compulsion to use it.

A wispy blue doe burst into the room and I braced myself for what would surely be Severus’s voice giving bad news. I was pleasantly surprised when Lily’s tear-filled tones filled the silent room.

“The boys are back.”

I took one last look at my former headmaster before turning my back to him for the last time and walking out of the room and I didn’t stop until I arrived at the gates. I turned and disapperated.

I landed in the living room of my small cottage. Briefly, I wondered if it would look the same once the baby was here. I wondered if I’d survive long enough to see it. I was then sandwiched into a hug between two decidedly masculine bodies, shocking me out of my stupor. I let out a strangled laugh and hugged them back. It had been too long.

Later, Lily was pressed into James’s side with a sleeping Hazel between them and I was pressed into Sirius’s with a warm cup of tea. I let the familiar smell that is distinctly Sirius wash over and comfort me from the trials of the past few weeks.

“So, Hermione has some news for us.” Lily baited once there was a lull in conversation. I hesitated. Lily caught it and gave me a look. I said the first thing that came to mind.

“Dumbledore is dead.” Sirius and James stiffened while Lily let out a gasp.

“How? Who did it?” James asked quietly.

“You remember the Unbreakable Vow he forced me to take?”

“How could we forget?” Sirius said angrily with a guilty look on his features. I stroked the back of his hand with my thumb calming him.

“He broke his end of it.” Everyone deflated. The guilty relief of no longer having someone breathing down our necks was bringing us closer together. No one mentioned it, but we could all feel it.

“How did he break it?” Lily asked after a while.

“He tried to send me forward in time with a prototype timeturner.” Sirius tightened his hold on me. “But it didn’t work,” I said once I saw their horrified expressions. “He accidentally just sent me back in time an hour.” I sipped my tea.

“Are you sure that time traveling is alright in your _condition_?” Lily asked conspiratorially.

“I’m sure its fine Lily, it’s just a cold.” I said bit more forcefully than I intended.

“You still have that bug, Kitten? It’s been weeks.” Sirius said looking down at me.

“Yes, I do.” I said keeping eye contact with a silently fuming Lily.

I sipped my tea.

* * *

“I don’t understand why you still won’t tell him.” Lily said hotly.

It had been a few days since the boys returned from their auror mission and I’ve been going out of my way to keep Sirius from knowing I’m expecting his child. The Fidelius Charm had been cast and at the moment Sirius was the secret keeper, however, that was going to change tonight. Lily and James invited Peter over to “reconnect” with the rest of us which included myself and Sirius. They thought dinner was the best way to go about making the request for Peter to be the new secret keeper.

The Order had all but fallen apart without Dumbledore to lead. Alastor Moody attempted to take over, but with crime rates through the roof due to death eater activity, there wasn’t much time for leadership. While hopes for the resistance was at an all-time low, Voldemort was ecstatic according to Severus. Once the news had hit the papers that the “old fool” had gone back on his unbreakable vow, the Dark Lord called a meeting and gave permission for more direct and open attacks. While he still believed in the old prophecy, he turned his attentions toward finding Hazel.

“He’ll try to keep me out of the fight.” I said simply while continuing to peel potatoes.

“Is that such a bad thing?” Lily said turning around and facing me.

“Yes, Lily, it is.”

“You could lose it if you fight!” She yelled hysterically.

“And I could lose all of you if I don’t!” I matched her. The potato and peeler fell out of my hands and clattered on the counter.

“You may never get this chance again!” She screamed. The little kitchen in Godric’s Hollow rang with the silence that followed. Slowly I closed my eyes and tried to calm my breathing.

“You don’t have to remind me.” I whispered so quietly if it wasn’t for the silence she wouldn’t have heard it.

“He deserves to know.” She said just as quietly. I opened my eyes and looked at Lily. Her eyes looked at me, pleading.

“Know what?” I jumped and without thinking summoned my wand from its holster into my hand ad under the chin of whoever just walked in, a curse about to leave my lips.

“Come back to me, love.” The voice said soothingly, breaking me out of my autopilot.

“S-sorry, this night just has me on edge.” I shared a hard look with Lily. “We were just talking about how dinner is almost ready and you guys should know.” I clasped my hands together to keep them from shaking. Or to trap the guilt from lying to my fiancé for the umpteenth time.

He looked at me, not believing it for a second, before shook his head and said, “Peter just arrived.”

Dinner was a somber affair. Lily was preoccupied with a fussy Hazel and James was staring intently at his plate. Sirius kept attempting to sooth my own nerves with is nervous habit of petting me or touching me anywhere he can reach. All it was doing was making me hot, the temperature in the room was stifling. I rolled up the sleeves of my “lucky” navy jumper. Peter, who had been stuffing his face with abandon, looked sharply at this moved and burned a hole into the scar on my forearm.

Despite the plan to use Peter’s betrayal to our advantage, there was the underlying hope that he wouldn’t give away his closest friends. More than once I caught everyone spare his own left forearm a passing glance wondering what they would find under his sleeve. Self-consciously, I rolled my sleeves back down covering the scar once more.

“So, Peter,” James began. “We actually had another reason for you joining us tonight.”

Peter set down his cutlery and wiped his mouth with a napkin before speaking. “What’s that, Prongs?”

Beside me I felt Sirius flinch at the nickname. “Well I’m sure you’ve heard about the threat of the prophecy and how that makes Hazel a target, and with Dumbledore gone, we feel our options for safety are running low.”

“What are you saying, James? Why did you bring me here?” Peter’s voice turned low.

“We’re under the Fidelius Charm and as of right now Padfoot is our secret keeper.” Lily explained.

“And it’s obvious to anyone who knows us could figure that I would hold the secret.” Sirius said.

“We want you to be our secret keeper.” Lily finished.

“Y-you w-want me? B-but what about R-Remus?” Peter stuttered, giving me a sharp reminder of the sniffling servant in the Shrieking Shack.

“Remus is away with werewolves on Order business all the time and we can’t be sure he hasn’t …followed the pack so to speak.” James said.

“What he’s saying is that we don’t trust anyone quite like we do you.” I said feeling bile come up as those words left my mouth.

He was all too eager to oblige.

After he left, I ran to the bathroom and vomited. I wasn’t too sure I could blame it solely on morning sickness.

* * *

**SIRIUS**

Following James’s and my own return from our auror mission, the nightmares and doubts that previously plagued my mind increased with renewed vigor. Peter’s visit and subsequent reception of keeping the Potters’ secret did nothing to aid my disposition.

James and I found it best not to disclose the events of our mission with the women in our life. Considering how close we were to the end and how frayed everyone seemed, it’s a story better told after the fact. We got word that Antonin Dolohov was making connections within his hometown in Russia trying to expand the Death Eater regime. The neighboring muggle village held newspaper archives that told of an unknown presence that would appear every summer and kidnap young women. Only this year, the presence returned in October. Antonin Dolohov was masterful in the artistry of charms work, it was natural that he would want to expand this knowledge with the creation of new spells and given the nature of his upbringing, they were decidedly dark. We tracked him down to one of his old haunts only to find that the Russian was testing his experiments on the muggle women.

The old warehouse seemed barren on the outside but inside looked like a nightmare. Multiple young, muggle women strapped and chained to various medieval torture devices in various states or consciousness as well as varying states of dress with magical essence and scars marring their bodies. The smell alone was enough to linger forever, rotting flesh, rancid bodily fluids, singed hair. After apprehending Dolohov, who was caught off guard by our entrance, we looked over each woman for more serious injury and it became clear the Russian’s intentions with them were for more than magical experimentation.

A hand on my shoulder shook me out of the horrific scene. Looking into those beautiful caramel eyes filled with concern for me, I thanked every higher being that the purple scar covering her torso was the only thing she received from Dolohov.

“Are you alright?” She whispered, her hot breath visible in the cold air this night.

“I’m fine, love.” I managed, trying a smile that felt more like a grimace.

It had been a few days since the dinner with Peter and just as many sleepless nights. Everything was going according to the plan laid out weeks ago. Hazel was staying the week with Marlene while Regulus, Remus, Hermione and I were positioned in Godric’s Hollow waiting for Voldemort to make his appearance. On an otherwise peaceful night, the only thing keeping me grounded is Hermione’s warm hand pressing slightly on my shoulder as we sit under James’s cloak on the front porch railing of Bathilda Bagshot’s cottage and stare across the street at the dark outline of the Potter’s home where the only sign of life is the light through the window of what I know to be Hazel’s room. Somewhere down the street, Regulus and Remus are doing the same under disillusionment charms on sidewalk benches.

Hermione’s grip got tighter and I looked over to see her sway dangerously forward. I snuck my arms around her and held her close to keep her from falling off. I knew this was more than a typical bug and her lies and diversions were appalling. Despite being slightly hurt that she couldn’t outright tell me what was going on, I decided to give her time. Even if I already have my suspicions on what it could be. That thought makes my worry for her in this situation spike.

“Now, are you sure you are alright, Kitten?” I asked with light humor, but mostly concern.

She pressed her forehead into my shoulder and took a deep breath once. Twice.

“Yes, yes I’m perfectly fine.” She sat up and plastered a smile on her face.

“Are you sure you shouldn’t be at home resting?” I asked quietly, letting my worry take over. The silence that followed was deafening. Her balance wavered almost imperceptibly.

“No, this is where I need to be, fighting, you know this. Besides, it’s just a small cold.”

I flinched slightly at the nonchalance in her dismissal of her current state.

“I don’t want you to get hurt, even if this is just a _cold_.” Her brows furrowed in suspicion.

“ _Sirius_. I am finishing this. Nothing you can say will keep me from taking him down.” She hissed.

I was about to tell her that her life isn’t the only one she’s putting in danger when across the street the rickety, old gate creaked alerting us to the presence of the shadowed figure heading up the walk to the Potters’ front door.

“He’s early.” Hermione breathed. And that made it real.

 _He_ was here. _Voldemort_ was here. This was the end we’d been dreading. Peter had betrayed us. Despite Hermione telling us he would, despite it being part of the plan, I had the small hope he wouldn’t. That our friendship was strong enough to outweigh the silky promises of a dark lord. I watched, disassociated, as Hermione sent a wispy, blue Grim out of her wand in the direction of Regulus and Remus. Remus. I wondered if he felt the same cutting pain in his heart in the wake of Peter’s betrayal. Introductions on the Hogwarts Express, late night snack runs, planning pranks, wandering the halls drawing the map, choking on mandrake leaves in the process of becoming animagi, running under the light of the full moon for the first time, shameless flirting with Rosemerta to get firewhiskey, the first disappearance, talks of fighting for the light- tainted memories.

A loud explosion brought me out of my stupor. Voldemort had blasted the front door open. I shared a glance with Hermione- swirling silver and molten caramel. My eyes flicked down to the flat expanse of her stomach. I looked back up, opening my mouth to tell her to go to Marlene’s and stay out of the fight, but she was already hopping down, taking the cloak with her. I noted Regulus and Remus sprinting toward the house. I took a deep breath.

I slipped down off the safety of the railing and into a war zone.


	23. Chapter 23

**HERMIONE**

I coughed trying to expel the burning in my lungs. I took a deep breath and choked on ash. My vision was blurry and tinged orange, the heat of flames licking at my skin. Past the ringing in my ears, I heard the warbled sound of someone calling my name. I wanted to call out to them, but my throat was too tight and raw. I felt something wet trickling down my face and I couldn’t tell if it was blood or tears. I tried to move to get up but my muscles wouldn’t cooperate. The flames drew closer. I let the darkness take me under once more.

* * *

_A few hours ago:_

_The front door exploded and I wasted no time sprinting into the fight, I barely registered Remus and Regulus running with me and Sirius’s footfalls behind me. This was it. This was what my life had been building up to since I first got my Hogwarts acceptance letter. Every fight, every conversation, every plan, every scar. All the pain and tears and sweat. And blood. Is that what all this comes down to?_

_Remus and Regulus ran in the front door, wands drawn. I could hear James stalling Riddle. I ran around the house to the back door, Sirius on my heels. I no longer had doubts he knew I was pregnant. I didn’t expect him to leave my side throughout this entire fight. That could prove problematic if he’s giving all his attention to protecting me, he’ll be distracted and susceptible to injury._

_As we reached the door, I felt a cool sensation fall over me, trickling down my spine causing me to shiver. Anti-apperation wards were up. I watched a silvery form fly through the air briefly before disappearing. The Order would show up soon. I threw the door open and stepped inside. I heard another explosion. I hoped they’d come soon._

_I heard spells flying, there was a light show in the hallway, Lily shrieked, Remus growled low. I was about to run into the fray when I felt a hand on my arm pulling me back._

_I turned looking into those silver eyes I fell in love with. Those silver eyes that currently are swimming with worry and pain but are quickly hardening for the battle ahead. Those eyes that almost imperceptibly glanced down at my stomach before meeting mine once more._

_“Be careful.” He said with a strained growl._

_“You know I will.” I promised. Neither of us knew if I’d be able to keep it._

* * *

I felt a cool wind swirling around me, bringing me out of unconsciousness, kicking up dust and ash. I coughed and winced at the gurgling sound. The wind picked up, lifting me into the air, whipping my hair about my face and disturbing the rags that were my clothes. I closed my dry, burning eyes at the cool, comforting sensation. Around me, support beams and large pieces of drywall, remnants of the Potters’s destroyed house, were raised as well and moved out of the way. Ancient magiks were at play.

* * *

_I darted down the hallway, dodging stray spells and pulling up quick shields. The living room was a battlefield. Upturned couches acted as barricades, end tables served as bastions, the middle rug absent of its coffee table was no man’s land._

_Light on one side, dark on the other. The chess board was set and pieces were moving._

_James was groaning from his position on the floor surrounded by the remains of a broken chair. Lily, Regulus and Remus were sending everything they had at Riddle, enraged expressions on their face while he stood there with a twisted smile on his face as he countered every curse and sent back his own._

_Sirius ran to check on his best mate while I hung back, my presence unnoticed by either side. I assessed the situation. Lily and Remus were throwing every curse and hex they knew, which wasn’t saying much because they were all light curses with simple counters and easily overpowered. Consequentially, they were quickly becoming winded and wouldn’t last much longer. Regulus was faring better, though not by much, by throwing dark curses he likely learned in his upbringing and time as a death eater. These curses were harder to throw off and counter thus causing almost imperceptible hesitation in Riddle’s casting. However, these required more power to cast so Regulus was growing tired alarmingly fast._

_This needed to end soon. Where was the Order?_

_Sirius, satisfied with James’s condition, joined the fight and I quickly followed. Sirius, much like Regulus, was not holding back on his arsenal of curses. Through grudging respect, I adopted Bellatrix’s fighting style, throwing the darkest of curses and distracting with joke hexes._

_Tickling hex, Babbling jinx, Disentigration curse, Conjure birds, Cutting Curse, Conjure Patronus, Conjure water, follow with fire._

_Riddle, taking on five to his one, was growing frustrated. The mix of light and dark curses only adding to this. His smile was overtaken by his livid scowl. In a growl of anger, his magic pulsed around him sending all of us to the ground. A flick of his wrist and Lily and Remus were trapped in the adjacent room that held an injured James and blocked by one of Riddle’s wards. Sirius and Regulus were left to try in vain to dismantle the ward that held them in the corner of the living room. I quickly got to my feet, staring defiantly at the creature that’s cause my life so much strife._

_“Your turn, my dear.” He mocked, twisted smile back in place._

_My smile matched his. “Let us play, Tom.”_

_His dark eyes smoldered, fire licking the edges of his irises. I raised my wand._

* * *

The debris and dust around me cleared and I could see the sun rising in the distance. I looked down and saw the Order members searching the rubble. The ethereal wind whipped at my face and clothes, repairing and healing small cuts. My clothes seemed to knit themselves back together. My hair untangled itself and fell in chocolate colored ringlets. The blood stains on my clothes went away. The liquid in my pierced lung dispersed and for the first time in years, I breathed easier.

* * *

_We fought with renewed vigor. I had caught my second wind and it seemed Riddle had as well. I wasn’t naïve enough to think that I stood a chance against him, he was too powerful, only a fool would think otherwise. I was just trying to buy time until my friends could undo their wards or until the Order showed up. Whichever came first and neither seemed to be happening any time soon._

_I kept with my casting pattern, trying to confuse or distract. He seemed to have caught on to my style, he was countering too easily. Perceptive prat._

_“You cannot best me in a duel, muggle.” He taunted._

_“I don’t presume to think I can, I’m not the brightest witch of my age for nothing.” I replied simply, sending him a Sectumsempra. He seemed amused._

_“Your fight is in vain, you cannot win, hand over the child, I cannot be beaten.” He laughed gleefully._

_I smirked. “Oh I wouldn’t be too sure of that, Tom, like I said, I’m not a fool.” I hinted._

_He let out an enraged growl, losing concentration and letting his wards fall, he focused solely on me sending curse after curse, no longer toying. I gave up my offensive attacks and focused on defending against his onslaught. I heard my friends screaming something, but I couldn’t let my attention waver. I was growing tired, my muscles ached, I had cuts, bruises and various injuries all over. I just wanted it to end._

_He sent a slicing hex at my wand arm and it fell out of my hand. He summoned it to his grasp and broke it in two. I felt a pain in my chest. The wand that chose me, the wand that saw me through everything, the wand that symbolized everything I was, was broken. I wondered if I was next._

_“’Mione!” Came Sirius’s shocked cry. I turned and gave him a sad smile, silently conveying all my love for him. I was sure this was my end. I looked back at Riddle and took in the gleeful expression of triumph on his features. I watched him raise his wand and point it directly at me. But it wasn’t the curse I expected._

_“Crucio!”_

_Where Bellatrix’s was like thousands of knives set on fire, Riddle’s was millions of needles injecting acid. I screamed. My back arched off the carpeted floors. I didn’t even register myself falling. My nails scratched at invisible needles in attempts to quell the pain. So much pain. I couldn’t comprehend anything other than the feeling. My very existence at that moment began and ended in pain._

_And then it stopped. I could breathe a little easier. My stomach contorted painfully and I curled in on myself. I felt a sick wetness between my legs and my breathing stopped all together._

* * *

The wind flowed through my body, starting at my stomach and going outward toward my limbs. I’d never felt lighter. I felt a tentative smile come to my face. Slowly, the wind calmed and lowered me back to the ground. The ash felt dry and light on my bare feet. I walked slowly towards familiar people, minding my shaky balance. Regulus was the first to notice me. Soon everyone swarmed.

* * *

_I heard commotion and turned my head slightly to see Sirius engaging Riddle, angrier than I’d ever seen him. The Black family madness making an appearance. But he was no match. Riddle sent an unknown curse that slammed into Sirius and threw him across the room, hitting the wall and slumping to the floor. He didn’t get up._

_Riddle, now satisfied we were no longer a threat, attempted to dismantle the anti-apperation wards. Where did everyone else go? My gaze fell to the ground at my side where my beaded bag resided, having fallen out of my pockets. My beaded bag. My beaded bag!_

_As quickly and quietly as I could manage, I moved my quivering hand into the depths of the inside and felt around for the piece of wood with six honeycomb knots. As I pulled the unbeatable wand out another item fell out onto the carpeted floor. I stared at the smooth surface of the stone and contemplated the symbol. Triangle: the invisibility cloak in my back pocket. Line: the deathstick in my hand. Circle: the stone in front of my eyes._

_I grasped the stone in my shaking hand before retrieving the cloak and pulling it over myself. I crawled over to where Sirius was still laying broken. I laid my head against his chest and listened for that familiar heartbeat. I felt it more than heard it. Tears stinging my eyes I sat up and cast an enervate and silencing him so not to attract attention. He looked around confused for a moment until I raised the cloak slightly._

_“’Mione?” He mouthed. I nodded. I whispered for him to stay quiet and unsilenced him._

_“The Order is here. Everyone else is fine. We need to get out of here. They can-“ I shook my head tears falling down my face._

_“No, I have to do this. I can end this.” I implored._

_He shook his head fervently. “No it’s suicide! Let someone else handle it. You’re not just thinking of yourself here.” He whispered heatedly. I felt a few more tears fall._

_I gazed into his eyes. Silver, with flecks of blue. Rainy skies with gaps in the clouds. Hope in the bleak grey of the world. Swirling silver meeting hardening caramel one last time._

_“I love you.” I whispered standing up._

_“No, don’t say that. You’re not doing this.” He tried to reach for me, but his pain was too great._

_“I’m not asking.” I tied him up with an incarcerous feeling my magic sing from using the Elder Wand for the first time. I silenced him, not wanting to hear his heart wrenching protests and cast a bombarda at the wall that led outside. I levitated him outside where the moon was casting a faint glow over the dark yard and tried to ignore how he was struggling against the restraints. I set up wards so no one could get in or out._

_“Forgive me.” I whispered despite knowing he couldn’t hear me._

_I turned around and met Riddle’s gaze that told me he’d watched the scene with no small amount of amusement. I pulled the rest of the cloak off and let it fall to the floor._

* * *

I was told Sirius was taken to St. Mungo’s along with James and Lily. Remus and Regulus stayed behind as they hadn’t been nearly as hurt. I was immediately taken there and given my own room to be healed. I was silent through the ordeal. Many asked what happened. I couldn’t open my mouth to speak. Later, Sirius walked in and we locked gazes. He paid no mind to the healer that was berating him for being out of bed. He walked over slowly and sat on the edge of my bed, never once breaking eye contact. A tear fell down my cheek and two fell down his.

* * *

_He waited until I casted first. If he was exhausted at all, it didn’t show. My already shaking limbs quickly became more lethargic with every spell I sent his way. Riddle, who certainly not happy for having fallen into a trap, looked ecstatic to finally kill the time traveling thorn in his side. He kept advancing closer with every curse and hex. We met in the center of the room and he thought he had me, that is until I smiled._

_“The ring.” I said, punctuating with a well-aimed diffindo. His smile faltered._

_“The diary.” He sliced my cheek. My smile widened._

_“The locket.” He cracked my rib, puncturing a lung. I laughed._

_“The cup.” He screeched inhumanly. I blocked a blood-freezing curse._

_“The diadem.” He sent me across the room. I smirked._

_“I’ll just make more. And I’ll start with you.” He growled, striding over to me. He wrapped his long, pale fingers around my throat and tightened his hold until my vision had a darkening vignette. He lifted me off the ground until my toes barely scraped the ground. How positively muggle of him._

_“Wrong again, Tom.” I croaked. I pointed my wand at his chest. “You won’t be leaving here tonight._ Fiendfyre _.”_

_Riddle dropped me to the ground, caught off guard by my casting and backing away from me trying to control the fire that was quickly engulfing his robes. His inhuman scream alerted me to his pain. He dropped to the ground trying to put the fire out, but it was in vain. The fire had begun to spread at a rapid pace and was quickly spreading to all parts of the Potter’s house. I watched with sick fascination as the flames overtook Riddle’s form and became satisfied when his screams ceased._

_I never mastered the curse enough to control it, but I knew it was a guaranteed way to kill the man. And I would go down with him. But if it meant that Hazel would have the happy life that I wished for Harry, and that Sirius would never go to Azkaban, and Remus would never have to be alone, and Lily and James were able to live, and everyone I went to Hogwarts with could live a life without fear, then I would gladly sit here and burn. I watched the fiery form of a snake slither closer and closer as my heavy eyelids fell lower and lower. I gave in to my magical exhaustion and as the resurrection stone sat heavily in my palm, and I thought: finally._

* * *

We didn’t say anything, we just held each other. He refused to leave much to the disappointment of his healers. In the end they just magically enlarged my single bed into a double. The healers shoved potion after potion down both of our throats and came in every few hours to run tests. After one truly horrible tasting potion that I didn’t recognize, I decided to read the label. Prenatal Vitamins. I visibly stiffened, eyes wide. Sirius broke the silence that had settled between us, his worry taking over.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” He asked, laying a hand on my shoulder.

I looked up at him with watery eyes and spoke for the first time in what felt like years. “We’re okay, we’re both okay.” I said with one hand over my stomach.

He grabbed me in a tight hug and everything finally felt right.


	24. Epilogue

**SIRIUS**

“Sirius, why the hell are we hiding in the bushes? We’re too old for this.”

“Relax, Kitten, just enjoy the show.” I replied.

We were indeed hiding in the bushes like horny teenagers- minus the teenager part. I had it on good authority that a very good thing that will make my wife very happy is about to occur in the clearing in front of us. In fact, I recommended this spot. It had lovely flowers that bloomed this time of year, a breathtaking view of the lake and it was a good distance from the prying eyes that lived in the castle. Not to mention these bushes that were great for spying. The sun was setting and it was a perfect day in May.

“Seriously, my back is hurting from being crouched down like this.” She grumbled.

“Maybe you are getting old, love.” I looked at her fondly. “Oh Merlin! Is that a grey hair?” I donned a look of astonishment before picking at her chocolate colored curls that didn’t have a hint of grey in them.

“What!?” She shrieked, batting my hands away. I laughed, she slapped me. “You absolute prat!”

I heard voices and footsteps approaching and quickly shushed her. “Show’s starting, Kitten.” I smiled.

“Draco, why the hell did you drag me up here, you know I hate bugs.” A feminine voice said, matter-of-factly.

“It has a nice view, so shut up.” A masculine voice belonging to Draco said.

“Ah yes, the lake that I get to see every day.” She said sarcastically.

I snickered lightly and Hermione slapped me. She was completely enthralled by the scene unfolding in front of us.

The pair of teenagers walked into view. The boy named Draco was every bit his father’s son standing tall with platinum blonde hair and eyes the color of hardened steel. He unconsciously continued to run a hand through his bangs which fell over his eyes, leaving them artfully dishelved: a nervous tick of his. The girl only came up to his shoulder and had a small pout on her bitten lips. She had boisterous curls she’d inherited from her mother, however, they were the color of dark ink like her father. Her silver eyes scanned the clearing observing every detail. He was still in his auror robes and she in her uniform complete with her head girl badge.

The girl was still facing away from Draco, calculating the significance of the clearing. “Honestly, you’ve been so weird. You came all the way back here to ask me to go on a walk. A walk! You hate going on walks. And you never come to visit unless you want something.“ She said with a frown.

She turned around to face him and was stunned. He was down on one knee, getting mud on his very expensive, designer slacks. “Draco, what the fuck are you doing?” The girl asked in a serious voice.

“Vulpecula,” She scowled at her name but let him continue anyway. “we’ve known each other since we were kids. I remember pulling your hair and calling you horrid names.” He looked terribly guilty. “But I’ve known since the day you punched me in the face for stealing your books-“

“Like mother like daughter.” I whispered to Hermione who was biting her bottom lip trying to keep from laughing, mirth dancing in her eyes.

“-That you were it for me. I’m still a prick to you, nothing’s changed, but didn’t you ever realize that boys are always meanest to the girl they like?” Vulpecula, at this point looked vaguely disgusted and her eyes kept darting around the clearing.

Draco laughed nervously before continuing. “You’re the only one I can hold an intelligent conversation with, and you’re not afraid to put me in my place- you do that quite a lot now that I think about it.” His brows furrowed as he trailed off.

“Godric, this is a disaster.” I laughed behind my hand. Hermione snorted.

“The point being,” He began again, a bit loudly, startling Vulpecula. “That I want to spend the rest of my life with you. That I’ve loved you for years behind all of our bickering, despite only getting together this year.”

“I knew it. I fucking knew it.” Hermione whispered gleefully and turned to me. “You owe me twenty galleons.”

I sighed and handed it over.

Draco reached into his pocket and pulled out a sphere whose bottom half was white and top half red.

I started laughing again and noticed Hermione’s shoulders shaking as she shook her head.

He opened the ball and held it our presenting a ring that was glinting in the light of the setting sun. “Vulpix, I choose you!”

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Vulpecula asked crossing her arms and glaring down at Draco who only blinked, still holding the ring out.

“Godric, that’s the last time I take you to muggle London. Get up, you’re embarrassing me.”

Draco scrambled to his feet with all his pureblood grace. “So is that a yes?” He asked.

“What do you think, asshole?” She said heatedly holding out her left hand with her right resting on her hip.

Draco took the ring and slid it on to your ring finger.

She punched him on the arm. “Never call me ‘Vulpix’ again.” She told him.

“But ‘Vulpecula’ is okay?” He smirked. She punched him again.

By this point Hermione had put a silencing charm around us to contain our laughter. She’d fallen over clutching her stomach.

“Just ‘Rose’.” She glared.

“As you wish, Little Fox.” Draco gave her a lopsided smile that she tentatively returned.

“Don’t think that this means I like you or anything.” She said.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He smirked.

“This is real right?” She asked, suddenly self-conscious. “It’s not one of your stupid pranks that only you think are funny?”

“Nope, it’s real. Asked your dad and everything.” She looked stunned momentarily.

Hermione was equally as stunned.

“He really asked you?” She asked me.

I nodded. “He came in like a stuttering fool. You would have loved it.”

“Twitchy, little ferret.” Hermione said fondly.

“Not a, what was it? A ‘foul, loathsome, evil, little cockroach?’” I asked her with a grin.

She slapped me.

“Want to go remind them how closely related they are?” I asked my wife, laughing.

“No, we don’t want to traumatize them. Besides, they’re distant enough not to have to worry.” She said with a smile.

“Looks like you’ve got a wedding to plan.” I told her. Her eyes lit up.

“I do love you, you know.” Vulpecula told her fiancé as they turned to leave.

“Ew. You fucking nerd.” Draco said crinkling his nose and reaching out to hold her hand, thumbing the ring.

“Merlin, their relationship is weird.” Hermione said shaking her head.

I couldn’t help but agree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is, that's it! Thank you for reading.  
> I am currently writing more stories I just haven't posted them, and I currently have a fremione story in progress on ff.net that I'll probably start posting here soon.  
> Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas (or Happy Holidays!) and a Happy New Year!


End file.
